- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
That's like the least helpful advice I've ever heard. If I wanted some kind of Christian abstinence advice, I'd go see a priest.
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m glad you understand this!!!! That whole sex outside of marriage is bad/unhealthy etc can be very damaging. Ask me how I know 😳 It can fuck you up mentally. Now onto your post. Are you doing therapy yet? Anxiety can really mess with uour libido and also, trying to force yourself to have sex is likely to backfire, as you have seen. Be patient with yourself. If you haven’t done any of the community groups definitely join some of those. You are not alone
- Date posted
- 3y
Hi - I’m also a Christian and going through my own questioning of sexual-related Christian doctrine alongside scrupulosity ocd and am also questioning if im on the asexual spectrum etc. lol BUT i can empathize that intrusive thoughts and anxieties of all kinds suck a lot and are completely valid. I think knowing when you are doing things because you want to vs because ocd is telling you to and recognizing that some thoughts are just ocd trying to get to you are good first steps. Then you can tell the ocd to shut up when the thoughts start to play and see it as separate from you. That has helped me with some of my obsessions. My therapist also has me write “narratives” about my fear (basically writing the worst case scenario) and exposing myself to that story until it holds less power. Hope that helps maybe. Prayers that you will find comfort peace and wisdom in the midst of all you are going through. It can be so hard but just being on this app I know you are getting where your going :)
- Date posted
- 3y
Sex outside of marriage can create all sorts of problems; so my advice would be to wait. But anyways even if you don’t listen to that, I would say that relationships are not about sex; it shouldn’t be the focus. Also, if you are having intrusive worries that can certainly affect your ability to have an erection because you’re focused on your own worries rather than your love for the other person. Maybe ERP would be to just accept that you may never get better, but I think you will eventually, but if you accept that then maybe you will not be so worried when the thoughts come in.
- Date posted
- 3y
There is more to sex than penetration, but many men have worries about performance. Definitely work with a therapist on your exposure hierarchy.for this. The theme doesn’t matter so much - all OCD can be treated with ERP.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
Hello, im a 21ye old male. All of my life i was always atrscted to girls, even if it was only a hug by a girl i liked i got a boner. I always fantasised about doing fun stuff (not onyl sex) with my gf. Had a gf for almost two years. Two months ago i fell into severe anxiety about my sexuality changing. It happened to me 2 years ago bit then i had my gf and i did not need to worry if i will find a girl i love or will i be able to because i already had her. The toughts were realy intense but they faded and for 2 years i did not experience any doubts or fears about it. Then it happened again in december. For 2-3 weeks i was realy down...constant toughts about doing things with men i never wanted to do, fear that i liked someone, fear of denial...but them bc of getting back with my girlfriend it was okay for three weeks almosf. Then we broke up again and after a few days i had the worst days of my life. I felt like i actually changed, i did not know what to do. Then after a week I went out with a girl and when she laid on me when we wafched a show I got aroused like i always did with my ex. I felt such relief and i could handle my fears and anxiety for almost a month. Then a week ago the fear returned and i am again in a very bad spot, i dont know what else to do, i have no girl that i love, i am afraid i will never be able to experience those same feelings and moment that i had with my ex and then again the toughts of being in denial came back. I dont know what to do. My psychiatrist said i dont have ocd but onyl simptoms and that my anxiety is the proboem. Any one experienced something similar? Thanks
- Date posted
- 23w
I started having intrusive thoughts about my sexuality when I got into a relationship with my ex and I wondered if it would seemingly go away but it hasn’t and I find myself ruminating about it constantly especially before or during my period. Has anyone else felt with this?
- Date posted
- 19w
I know that anxiety and OCD can affect you in a lot of ways and I know it can affect your sex life. I was having sex with this chick about 4 days ago and everything about was amazing. it was a random hookup. But I got tired quick and got so worried about meeting certain expectations during intercourse I lost my erection part way through and couldn't match her pace and that felt honestly embarrassing and debilitating. Like there is no way I should be not keep it up with this chick. But I am aware anxiety can destroy performance in intercourse and I look at porn and notice other guys maintain erections forever without constant stimulation. A few seconds with stimulation and I lose mine. But I am been like that pretty much forever. Do I have misconception about how that works or is something wrong with me cause the doubt sucks. The girl even said that it was weird how I got soft after not that long. But she tried to be supportive for the most part but it felt terrible. If i am not flexing by pelvic muscles it feels like I can't maintain it.
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