I’d love some encouragement from anyone who is willing to send it my way. I’m having a hard time really leaning into uncertainty and my exposures. I know I need to take a leap if I’m going to get better, but I just don’t want to! I struggle to stop myself from ritualizing and I put off doing my exposure tasks too. Any support would be greatly welcomed. Thanks everyone.

hi. so one big factor of my OCD is rumination. i met a guy who i have a crush on the idea of (idea bc there are red flags). my biggest fear is not finding true love, my ex told me no one else would deal with what i have (my ocd, specifically reassurance seeking and getting overstimulated after intimacy). a few weeks ago, my friends and family all gathered and tried to give me advice that sounded like “you’re shy and you’ll never find someone.” after that, i’ve felt off. i’ve been using an unhealthy coping skill, daydreaming, and i’ve just felt unbalanced. my ocd makes everything feel different sometimes, i can’t explain it. life, myself, almost like being in a dissociated state. has anyone else experienced that? i don’t know how to remain balanced during my off times and i know pms exasperates it all. i take ashwaghanda and omega 3s in a multi vitamin daily. i take them all together in the evening but i’ve missed three days recently and also messed with my rocky sleep schedule because of fun times with friends. i hope these supplements work, because i don’t know if i’d be brave enough for medication. i had a bad reaction on prozac and often am forgetful. i just have been battling my OCD consciously for almost ten years now and unconsciously for longer. i am so tired, as my mental health extends beyond my OCD. i’m in talk therapy with some cbt aspects but i only see her twice a month. i’ve broken down so many times and promised myself id get on track or that certain things would work, but it’s like i am stuck in a circle that gets smaller when i’m able to help myself. i just want to be normal. i want to be able to mess up my sleep schedule to enjoy good times and not suffer horrible consequences or fear that i will be entirely thrown off balance. i don’t want to worry or doubt or feel so dissociative that i squint my eyes for a moment and wonder why i feel so unreal. i will never understand why god has allowed me to go through this. i cannot let it be for nothing but i don’t know how much more to bend and contort my body and brain to get somewhere stable but how lovely it would be if i could. i don’t have much of a schedule right now, i get apathetic and give in with things from time to time. one thing can trigger me and i am back to square one wether in a week or month. any advice, any and all is so helpful. your stories, your thoughts. maybe feeling less alone and knowing what has helped you is exactly what i need right now. thank you 💗

Hi everyone. I'm feeling kinda scared because I have to wait a whole month to start ERP therapy, but I feel like I need to start doing exposures now because the longer I wait, the more anxiety I get. It just feels like the OCD monster is getting worse. One thing that helps me is asking one person about an obsession I have...asking a person that I trust, and then doing an exposure after I get the "ok" to do it. I feel like I do need 1 reassurance and then I can go ahead and do it. I know i'm not supposed to ask for reassurance at all, but i dont think you're supposed to do ERP on your own right? Does anyone have any suggestions for what to do while waiting for therapy? PS-the reason there is a wait is bc she's on vacation. After she's back we will meet regularly.

Specifically how can my fiance best support me without offering reassurance? I'm trying to encourage myself to grow and keep trying ERP, but I'm not sure how I can include my partner in a healthy way. I plan on talking to my therapist about it soon, but I wanted to hear thoughts from people who have been dealing with it themselves.