ac (she/her)

Date posted: 3y

Anybody willing to talk depersonalization?

kosmo

Date posted: 3y

🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏻‍♀️

Anonymous

Date posted: 3y

I am very sorry to hear that you are experiencing this. I have experienced varying degrees and durations of dp/dr since 2014 as a result of meditation, particularly following multi-day retreats which consisted of upwards of 9 hours of meditation per day. The longest bout following a retreat was several years back and lasted close to three months. I stopped meditating this past January after a decade of dedicated practice with a Zen community and although I miss the connection my mental health is far better overall as a result. A similar thing happened to a friend of mine who was a long time meditator and upon seeking help from a therapist was diagnosed with OCD as well. Unfortunately, meditation is perceived as a a panacea for stress, depression, anxiety, etc, but for many, it has adverse effects that are not well publicized. If anyone recommends meditation to for you right now please don’t move in that direction, and if you’re currently meditating, even for shorter durations using apps like headspace or calm, please consider discontinuing your practice to see if your symptoms lessen. Hope that this is helpful.

girlanon

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 3y

Me!

Lilyrosalynd

Date posted: 3y

heyyy!

nicocd

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 3y

for sure

expos27

Date posted: 3y

I have experienced depersonalization! I find it very difficult! I hope you feel better soon!

ac (she/her)

Date posted: 3y

Thank you!!

GoneHiking

Date posted: 3y

I think I've felt it, or at least something like it (it might've been dissociation or some kind of depression, I'm not completely sure), and it was hands down the scariest sh*t I've ever experienced. It went away eventually, but it was really hard in the moment. I think it's a good idea to attempt to accept how you're feeling and not fight it; if you tell yourself that you're wrong for feeling the way that you are, that's only going to make it harder. Be gentle with yourself as best you can - I'm here if you need to talk.

ac (she/her)

Date posted: 3y

Thank you so so much!

kaylanicole01

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 3y

Hi there! Totally understand where you are coming from! I felt this way when I was in a very bad OCD episode, and it just felt terribly. Please, please remember that this will NOT last forever. I found that continuing with my ERP therapy and practicing my exposures on a daily basis really helped me. Show yourself compassion during this time. You could also try some grounding techniques to help if things get really frightening. You've got this!

ac (she/her)

Date posted: 3y

You are amazing. Thank you so so so much. I appreciate your kindness and empathy so much!!

ac (she/her)

Date posted: 3y

HIIII, FRIENDS !!! I have been depersonalizing for almost 4 months and it’s so frightening to continue to exist as someone that I do not connect with or recognize. I would love to hear and discuss your experiences as well.

nicocd

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 3y

I'm so sorry you're experiencing this!! It is so distressing. I've experienced depersonalization since I was a child, and there was a time I was out of it for a year or so. I went to therapy and worked on my social anxiety, depression, and trauma and it faded. It does take time but you can feel real again.

ac (she/her)

Date posted: 3y

@nicocd Thank you so much. I appreciate your kind words of support and empathy. I have experienced it when I was younger as well, but now here it is again and becoming so very powerful over my life! Do you have any coping suggestions? So sorry that you have had to battle this as well. I’m with you in solidarity and always here to offer support.

kosmo

Date posted: 3y

hello ! I've experienced both derealization and depersonalization but for me depersonalization was harder to deal with (currently dealing with depersonalization again but it's not as bad as my previous experience). whenever i look at the mirror or take a picture i don't recognize myself and it feels like my 'actual' self is separated with my body. to be honest my depersonalization comes (usually after an ocd relapse) and goes (takes me a long time to feel like myself again) but pampering myself, doing things i love/doing things that im passionate about, jamming/vibing to my favourite songs helped a lot. take your time, sometimes it feels really bad sometimes it's just meh or not that bad, don't stress about it too much, from what I've watched about someone who used to suffer from severe depersonalization they said that if you pay more attention to it it'll feel more scary. if u have any other questions feel free to ask me and i hope you feel better again soon, goodluck ! <3 :)

ac (she/her)

Date posted: 3y

@<3 OMG, THANK YOU!!! This literally described EXACTLY what I am experiencing. The mirror is so triggering because it’s always like I do not recognize myself and feel outside of the body of the person that I’m looking at. It FREAKS me out And THEN that pairs with my existential OCD. Thank you for offering advice, support, and for sharing your experience. I’m always here to listen.

mizzie1703

Date posted: 1y

@ac (she/her) did it ever go away? i’ve been having dpdr for months, 24/7, no breaks. it’s been hell

ac (she/her)

Date posted: 1y

@minezm16 Oh, I absolutely hear you! It IS absolute hell. So terrifying and so isolating. I promise it can get better! It has for me and I hope the very same for you! I’ve come to learn that depersonalization is a form of protection from feeling like you’ll mentally explode. It’s hard to believe that it’s a form of protection when it feels so scary. What has worked best for me is not to fight it. Allowing it to come and go as it likes and accepting its presence and knowing there is nothing wrong with you and nothing to solve. ❤️

kayla.