Has anyone else OCD toward morality? I have an obsession with being morally right, doing the right thing, being a good person etc I have a notebook with a list about my morals -things that are morally wrong/right -words to avoid because they are wrong -things to do to do the right thing -moral missions how to change the world ... I check at the end of the day if I was morally right and write it down and hate myself if I failed I am hypercritical of myself and also about others When for example and artist does something that’s against my morals(and even if it is only on slur in a song) I delete all their songs, unfollow them, don’t listen to the music again I am very isolated because almost no one can be always morally right ;me neither but I can’t stop this. Is this even OCD or am I narcissistic or something like that. Or am I maybe a narcissist with OCD. I come from a narcissistic family system so I am scared that maybe I turn into one without noticing.

I can be way too hard on myself and beat myself up over the smallest slip up in regards to OCD. Sometimes it can feel like I'm gaslighting myself on what was "so blatantly and obviously a moral atrocity in thought and intent", when 95% of the time I'm not even sure what my own intent with dealing with these thoughts is or why I do what I do. It makes me feel like some shameless beast for "daring to even entertain the thought of something so VILE!!!" When I just get so confused and scared on moral issues, like my mind is pulled down a rabbit hole I can't escape until the tricks are done on me and it's too late, i've accepted such ideas I hate until that hate and trying to not give in convince me "it might not be that bad". It feels like anything, even the most mundane things can trigger this. This cycle happens mainly because I feel like there's "no way to escape committing more 'attrocities' in thought or compulsion anyway"...and these cycles become the basis for more of these incidents. there a way to stop this? There have been multiple times where I called myself the R word, and even knowing it's a slur I still called myself that because "I'm nothing if not deserving of such scorn". Any attempt to stop the madness makes it worse and it's like all this I talked about is so convincing I dare not question it until after the fact. Please help.

Lately I have been engaging is a very vicious mental cycle of not being as productive as I wanted to at work, worrying my boss with notice and get mad at me or fire me, and then feeling like I have to “figure out” how to “fix myself” and be more productive. I come up with detailed elaborate plans and lists for everything I need to do and fix to be a good person. I have a lot of negative thoughts that are very distressing to me and basically I am a horrible person if I don’t “fix myself” via making these plans. For me, oddly, it’s not about doing the things, it’s about making the list. I do research on how to be more productive and have this need to make the perfect plan that will solve my problems. And then once I make the list I feel better (temporarily, of course). All of the mental energy put into the researching and planning is so draining that it begins to negatively impact my work… and the cycle continues!!! I feel like this is not a “normal” obsession or intrusive thought that people with OCD have, so I guess I am trying to figure out if it could be OCD? This is a very consistent thing I have been experiencing since probably around 8th grade?? So 5+ years now. It’s always the never feeling like I’m good enough and then the compulsory planning until I felt like I had a good enough plan to fix myself. Thanks in advance!! Disclaimer: I have not been diagnosed with OCD but I suspect I have OCD/Pure O or OCPD and many people in my life agree. Obviously this is not my only reason for thinking I have OCD lol

I know I have OCD, but is this a part of moral ocd? I have a huge thing about recycling. I feel guilty if I can't. (Ie, there's an item with food that cant be cleaned out since you have to rinse food off of stuff for it to be recycled). I've genuinely cried over having been given plastic bags instead of purely using reuseable bags. Another time I cried about not having the option to recycle things that were clearly recyclable while I was in the mental hospital. It was a tough week. Everything I have has to be sustainable. My toothpaste, shower soaps, hand soaps, detergent, and everything else has to be recyclable or I'll get upset about it. My toothbrushes are bamboo. Plastic irks me so badly. I want to help the planet and reduce waste. It feels right! But is that ocd? Or am I just weird about recycling? I just feel like a bad person if I can't recycle properly.