- Date posted
- 3y ago
- Date posted
- 3y ago
It would just latch on to something else. It would be a compulsion. Everything we did would be a compulsion. I know my husband is incredible and worth every bit of fight I am giving OCD. We deserve to have healthy relationships. I guess it depends on how important your relationship is to you! Or was to you before OCD took over!
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Yeah; i understand that... but my rocd; even If I am in therapy, gets stronger and stronger all the times that I see my boyfriend... and each time is worse! Even if I learned to throw away doubts, now bad feelings stay, and I have to choose between cry for like an half hour ( I think it release all the stress; because that way I actually enjoy the other times of the date) or stay anxious for all the time! Also, sometimes I feel guilty thinking that he deserve someone better than me! Furthermore, I start to forget about all the really good moments we had! It is like if wen ocd strikes, I connect to my boyfriend all the bed emotions, and the only chance I have to "survive" is to run away! I know it is wrong, and I really don't want it, but it is getting worse and harder in those time restist to the urge of breaking up! How do you "get out" from those moments? (Hoping that you don't have, but in case haha)
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I’ve already tried it and broke up with my bf SEVERAL times because of these exact thoughts and instantly whenever I did it I’d regret it because like you, I also didn’t want it but was also really sick of it and just wanted an escape. When you do break up, your ocd now starts saying “see they never really liked me, they aren’t even chasing after me” or “now he’s going to go with someone else and kiss/ have sex with another woman because he can, he’s single now”. Trust me, breaking up is not the answer, it’s another compulsion and another means to escape/avoid the feelings of anxiety/pain that the thoughts bring. Remember that ocd thoughts aren’t real, the solution is nothing, the more serious you take them, the more power they have over your life. Call them out, laugh at them but whatever you do, do not believe them. Once you believe them, you’re in serious danger
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Thank you again. I reached the point that even if I see my him, the second after he go away I start to cry. Everything is going well, but with all the anxiety accumulated, and all the bad moments and memories caused by ocd; I feel like I can't be myself anymore and I don't know if it is still worth fighting or not... but you gave me some hope!
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I feel this. My thoughts about leaving or breaking up and finally being “free” have honestly been making my anxiety decrease and go away. So that makes the whole idea more alluring and makes it seem better to break up rather than stay together. We’re all tried of these cycles and deserve to live our relationships thru. All while working on ourselves. Compulsions and ocd are tricky. Especially when mixed with our fatigue of ocd in general and the separate problems it creates in our lives/relationships. Best of luck to all of you.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
YES; EXACTLY. I know that if I break up with him, things will return to "normal" and I would regain myself. It happened with my ex, I had the exact same doubts, and I (before therapy) acted in the same way. I really want to change things, but I don't know it it is possible, or is better to be single forever haha... and the fact that now it has been a couple of months that I am mostly without good feelings (or maybe the ocd make me think this way, I dunno) make me keep question about "is all af this worth it? If you are alone you would immediately feel better!". Probably another "intrusive think" but it is kind of true, and i'm scared that one of these days I will fall and listen to this! Thank you btw; you made me feel so understood! Sorry I'm Italian; still have some problems with English haha
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Think about this right, if you were to be with someone new, do you think that the same thoughts will come up? Will you be able to trust them or will the same doubts crop up? That’s when you know it’s your ocd talking
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I never saw it this way, maybe this could be a really good game changer. It is a very good point of view actually!! Thank you soooo much!!!!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 22w ago
Having a really bad day with my ocd. Just had a massive meltdown. I’ve had 3 sessions with an ocd therapist and I feel worse. This is very confusing to me. I’ve read online that it’s normal to feel worse at the start of therapy, but i don’t know. I’m asking for a lot of reassurance from people, way more than I have ever done. My doubts and thoughts seem to be getting worse. My mum said if the relationship is making you so unhappy why are you doing it? This was sooo triggering for me but maybe she’s right? She said if I didn’t have the relationship in my life, I wouldn’t be having meltdowns or have an ocd spike, so she thinks I should consider whether to be in the relationship or not! Omg it’s so awful to hear those words. But maybe she is kind of right? If somethings making you anxious or unhappy, you stop don’t you? So why haven’t I broken up with him? That would be the logical step. Im so worried to make myself even more ill so im very scared to carry on with the relationship, because right now, my mind is telling me its the cause of my unhappiness and i would be better without it. But is that my ocd speaking? How do I know?! My life without him would be so bleak, or is it my life without the idea of someone in it? I have so many questions, it’s overwhelming. What if I’m not listening to my gut? Maybe I’m not. That makes me feel sick if I’m ignoring myself again. This is torture. What can I do to stop all these doubts and feel better about things!!! I would love some advice 🙏🏻🙏🏻 (this is my ocd talking, but comments that agree with my ocd are very triggering like ‘yes if you feel like that that is a major red flag’. Just comments that maybe give some hope, thank you 🙏🏻)
- Date posted
- 21w ago
I’ve been struggling with relationship OCD and differentiating between what is an intrusive thought and what is a real doubt. I was really happy with my partner then I got one aggressive thought that I didn’t love him and this spiralled into noticing all his flaws. I struggle being around him because I feel a huge sense of guilt that these thoughts even come into my head and I cannot figure out if this is my brain lying to me or this is how I feel. It’s really impacting a relationship that is so important to me.
- Date posted
- 15w ago
That’s kinda my question. All my thoughts feel so realistic and so now I doubt if they are ocd and if I just can’t make my mind up about something and I’m using ocd as an excuse or something idc I feel like this post is word vomit.
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond