- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I don't know If it is possible or not. But surely; if you have anxiety/doubts/fears about a future relationship, therapy will help you understand better whatever it is, and most important how to manage everything!! I think it is a beautiful idea start already the healing journey!! Good luck!!
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
I don't know if it answers you or not, but at this point I don't think I can date ever again. I'm a hopeless romantic but the moment I'm faced with someone I like possibly liking me back I am so anxious I can't function. I don't have a specific fear, I just despise romance in real life despite wanting it so badly in daydreams. I've basically resigned myself to being lonely. I'm too scared of anything else
- Date posted
- 3y
You know, maby it is because you fantasticise it too much, and you fear that it will not be like in your expectations...
- Date posted
- 3y
@eoid Sorry I'm not a psychologist or anything, didn't mean to judge!
- Date posted
- 3y
I had a similar problem with touch, with people I like. Especially with my first bf, I used get too anxious, not even panicking but I was litterally blocked! It was strange and I don't know why I had it. I know that the first thing that helped me was talking about my "problem" to the other person, so he could not take it personally and think that I don't liked him. And the other thing was going really really slow; little steps every time. I remember that the first dates I gave him a number of hug.. like today you can hug me 5 time! Haha
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
@eoid Interesting. My ex was never understanding. But even just being in his vicinity made all my nerves on high alert
- Date posted
- 3y
@Kaylaaaa Well... it sounds like a really good erp to me!
- Date posted
- 3y
@eoid Joking obviously! Maby you can try a pyramid system! Like get used for example to text him sometimes, when you stop feeling so anxious, maby some calls, and goes that way! For me worked well also get used to the person and be able to trust him! But also the "living in the moment" kind of mentality! Do something without programs before with him! I am not a professional, and everyone Is different... but for me all of that worked!
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
@eoid Last Wednesday I went to a Christmas market with the girl I like... now I'm convinced I had zero feelings whatsoever and also am a bag of anciery and never want to date again š¢
- Date posted
- 3y
@Kaylaaaa Uhh sorry I assumed it was a him :( Hey you should know that feeling aren't everything! Like, you can love someone, even if in that moments you can feel nothing! Maby you can find something that help you let the stress out! Like a sport... or an hobby!
- Date posted
- 3y
Yes this was me for the longest time. It's actually harder than in a relationship cause you can't do behaviour experiments and exposures as easily
- Date posted
- 3y
Any advice for me? š what did you do? Did you just wait to address it until you were in a relationship? I feel itās probably not the best idea to just forget about it until then. Any tips are appreciated. š„“
- Date posted
- 3y
@mangoflavoredocd You know you can do imaginal exposures and such right? There are people with harm OCD or pedophilia OCD for whom actual full exposures make no sense to do.
- Date posted
- 3y
@arunb Oh I never really thought about that. You think thatāll be enough?
- Date posted
- 3y
@mangoflavoredocd No, nothing is ever enough for OCD lol, we have to change our entire approach to life
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
Good morning everyone, I need some opinions or help on what people might think is wrong. March 2024 is when I started questioning everything about my relationship for no reason he is everything that I wanted, but my mind is trying to tell me that it isn't April 2024 was probably one of the worst times of my life I stayed home from work because I was constantly crying and totally sick because I didn't know what to do. The thoughts slowly started to not bother me as much. I feel like since it ever started I never have gotten that. Love feeling back for my boyfriend, but I want it back so bad because when I did have it, it was absolutely amazing. I have no desire to kiss him or be intimate with him either which also scares me fast-forward to today. I am waking up with so many doubts in questioning myself. Is this ever gonna go away or am I ever gonna feel that love back for my boyfriend ever again? I feel like I'm wasting his time and my time because it feels never ending. I went to a therapist shortly after starting to deal with this and she didn't really seem to help so now on Wednesday I have a new therapist that specializes in OCD I think does anyone have any advice? Thank you so much in advance.
- Date posted
- 23w
Hey everyone, First time posting here! Wanted to share my story for some support but also to hopefully make others feel less alone. In short - my ROCD has made such a mess of my personal life. I was in a great relationship until spring of last year, at which point we separated mainly due to my ROCD. I struggled heavily with OCD about 10 years ago (harm based intrusive thoughts, sexual orientation ocd, etc). It took a lot of work but I was able to mostly overcome my struggles and truthfully, hadnāt given ocd much thought since then. I thought I was cured. And then 10 years later I am in a very fulfilling relationship with a girl I really love, but at about the year mark in my relationship things really changed. She wanted to have a conversation about next steps (moving in, marriage, kids, etc) and at that point my brain just went into panic mode and the ocd took over. From that point on, I was constantly scanning for red flags, felt very reserved when it came to any sort of statement or commitment and tended to avoid anything that would indicate I was committed to a long term future. It was not that I didnāt love it was just that my ocd was doing anything to keep me from making a big commitment. It eventually got a point where we had a big conversation about breaking up or staying together and my OCD convinced me that it was safer and that I would do less harm to her if we ended things, which was incredibly devastating to me. At the time I felt like my obsessing over small red flags were normal and that I needed to protect myself. I just had no clue it was ROCD. I spent the next 8 months missing her and kicking myself for my mistakes, and I eventually got the courage to reach out and see if sheād be willing to talk again, which she was. But the problem is, at this point I still didnāt know it was ocd. So when we talked again I was still plagued by ROCD as all the same thoughts and feelings came flooding back. We tried to talk through things but once again I was unable to make any sort of commitment to the future so it went nowhere. Once again, I am feeling very sad and angry at myself for not being able to handle ROCD. I feel like I let it control me twice and has robbed me of a lot of happiness and hurt someone I care very much about. I understand itās probably not best to just look at ourselves with anger and guilt all the time but itās hard not to when you feel like you just caused so much harm. Anyone feel like they can relate? Or if anyone is going through something similar I am happy to chat as ROCD can really be tricky. Thanks
- Date posted
- 19w
I started feeling a certain way in each relationship Iāve been in after a certain amount of time and it feels like itās something to do with relationship OCD or something like relationship anxiety. Iāve never been diagnosed with any type of disorder and so on but it just fills all the boxes that Iāve noticed and Iām worried that my relationship right now is slowly coming to a halt because of it potentially š. I have anxiety when Iām about to be talking to my girlfriend at times or when I have to call her and when sheās over and does certain things and it worries me so much and makes me wonder that is it ROCD or am I just not interested as much anymore? The anxiety definitely plays a role in my emotions too which causes me to not show as much too sadly. Can anyone help with this? I canāt see any therapists on here since my insurance (Ambetter) isnāt covered here
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