i’m very scared because what if I don’t care or love my boyfriend as much as he loves me? I’m just having a really hard week so can someone please respond

I would recommend Awaken into live on YouTube. It helps to make you realize love is a choice and it is good ERP to say maybe you don't feel love today, but you choose to love today and you don't need the answer right now. You've got this! ❤

I agree, hello dear. Love is a choice, and takes work. A few people on YouTube or tiktok to check out would be awaken into Love, and anxiouslovecoach. You've got this, and know ypu are not alone.

@WitchyKota I’m having a spiral right now “do I love him” “am I better off without him “ but I know deep deep in my heart I love him truly and I care so much but then my head thinks “do I love him for the wrong reasons “ when I’m in a spirals I just want to cuddle and get a kiss from him because he comforts me and supports me tells me not to try to put too much thought into the negative or replace with positive . is it bad I want to be comfort by him is that a bad reason to love him .

@lexi1347 No I don't think so, someone loving you right and you loving that about them isn't bad. Remember love is a choice, we choose it everyday. If you need someone to DM in between normal life I am here. I go into these spirals too, I am sorry these happen. I sometimes get the calm intrusive thoughts. Those are scary too, know that you are fighting this and you are so strong

@WitchyKota I know I love him I know I do I wouldn’t be so upset about the fact that maybe I didn’t love him . my mother always tells me if u truly don’t love someone you can get up and walk away without any problems. But it hurts to think about and it hurts to think I’ll be away from him . We broke up before and it killed me it felt like I lost half my soul , my best friend . Yeah dm would Be nice

@WitchyKota I want to love him I want to know I do so is that me choosing to love him . I mean I don’t wanna give up I do not want to give up on him he makes me feel warm and safe and comfort and when we go out I feel excited and happy

@lexi1347 i read when you said you knew super deep deep down you love him, what if i’m doubting that too?!? i’ve been really good at resisting compulsions but this is hard

@lexi1347 I am here my Instagram is: witchy.bun.bun

@Anonymous Ya it is rough, it can be very difficult. Tell yourself: okay so what, if I don't I don't, but right now I am with him and that's all that matters.

This is exactly how I’m feeling rn…I feel a flare up coming on. I’ve been staying with my bf for about two weeks now because my family got covid. And I’ve been feeling more irritated with him and I’m kinda sad so my rocd is being triggered. We can’t let this take over us though. You need to use erp. You should say things like “yeah maybe I don’t want to be with him anymore”. You have to accept it. “Yeah maybe I don’t love him” “maybe we will break up” but rn you’re together and that’s all that matters. My therapist tells me that unless there’s absolutely nothing you like about your partner anymore then you shouldn’t break up.

but how do you ever know if it’s not the right person or if it’s just your intrusive thoughts from ocd telling u he’s not the right person or what if u don’t love him .

Idk I fele like I know deep in my heart I love him and I’ll be sadder if I left him . He makes me warm , and I feel a sense of comfort around him he always makes me laugh . I try to think these intrusive thoughts don’t know how I really feel toward him but sometimes it’s hard to not believe then

@lexi1347 You don’t know. No one knows

@lexi1347 My therapist says that until there’s nothing you like about your partner then don’t break up.

@Anonymous If there are problems or you are not happy or fighting constantly not good

But my rocd tells me I’m not happy or I have anxiety around them because he may be the trigger but I still have so much love and happiness and he does nothing but support and love me and tells me everything is gonna be okay . how would I ever wanna leave someone that good . idk I guess we all have different experiences I think anxiety and unhappiness soemtimes is in healthy relationship you have to work togeteht to solve and get through it and find ways to make things exciting again

Actually alot of people with ROCD don't know, there isn't a right person. Love is a choice. It isn't a choice to be unhappy, to be nitpick, to have rocd, I don't think your responses belong here in this community. While ERP is helpful and helps alot of people just telling someone that they will know is not an okay response. I hope these people find their way through the rocd tunnel, I suffer from it too. I hope you are happy with your choices, but your experiences are not meant to guide theirs. Have a wonderful day ❤

@WitchyKota Thank you I also agree. Saying that you’ll know is triggering.

@Anonymous Agreed