Okay so I’m sitting here trying to relax and read my book. Sometimes I feel like it’s almost impossible to get through more than five pages without some sort of intrusive thought. I need the courage to practice my erp right now no just keep reading and not rereading the same sentence. Ugh OCD sucks.

Is the rereading a compulsion? Just remember a thought is just a thought and not reality. When I get intrusive thoughts and try to not do compulsions for them I start thinking about lots of good things that I want to happen like “I have a million dollars” “I have a chocolate cake in front of me” etc etc to prove thoughts aren’t real, or I even think thoughts like some crazy scary thing that’s different from the one fear I’m focusing on will happen right now, to also prove the thoughts don’t actually do anything.

I relate on this one. I think you re-read something because the moment you read you had a bad thought about yourself or someone you care about don't you?

TBH I'm not even sure there's a real way to pass get through this except by understanding that the moment we get obssess we're literally owned by OCD. I try to focus more on myself to better understand how to manage my energies. When I read something if I'm triggered I try not to pay attention, when it works I keep on reading but if I'm too triggered I know it's over and I'll end up wircling round and round so I stop and listen to music for example (it really helps). I assume there's no real escape as aforementioned and the only way to get better, maybe at some points, is to stop putting ourselves under pressure by willing to feel "normal". Try to manage and understand and yourself more than changing who you are because that's often when the mess begins.

I have this issue too! I’m too afraid to read my book because then I will be alone with my thoughts and my imagination, and that’s a frightening experience.

Ugh, I love to read and OCD has stolen the joy from me. When I went on more meds it got better but I lowered because of side effects and now it’s back.

Thanks for all your comments. Really helps not being alone in this !