- Username
- Brian F
- Date posted
- 2y ago
Thanks for your input. I believe being constantly in an an anxiety state, worrying and having your mind race with obsessive thoughts trying to convince you some physiological issue is causing the problem just overloads your mind. I think the cognitive issues and the brain fog are just a result of fatigue and exhaustion. Iv found some comfort in just accepting the uncertainty. I know it’s very unlikely I’m losing my mind but I have to accept that I can’t be 100% certain and I can’t do anything about that. Somehow that has eased the severity a bit.
Yes. I’ve been experiencing this for almost 3 years, and it got somewhat better last year but then my harm OCD hit and now I’m all over the place, full of extreme brain fog. I fear what if I act on my thoughts because I’m so full of brain fog, or what if I don’t love my family. Im not sure where my brain fog is coming from exactly but I think it may be coming from my depersonalization/derealization.
I also thought I had a brain tumor last year because of it, and I went to the ER and got a CT scan; everything was normal though.
Yes, my main fear is losing control either by going crazy, forgetting who I am, or developing a problem with my brain. My ocd bothered me all day today and at the end of the day, I had a hard time pinpointing exactly what I was obsessing over today. That started me down a spiral that something must be wrong with my brain to not remember exactly what I was thinking. It’s a hard thing to accept uncertainty to.
I’m tired guys. I’m tired of thinking something is always wrong with my health, tired of letting random symptoms/ sensations take over my brain and make me think something is horribly wrong. Tired of thinking I need to go to the doctors to get X & Y looked at. I’m tired of always assuming worst case scenario. I’m tired of constantly thinking if something is unethical/ immoral if I don’t do something, tired of always thinking I’m offending a religious higher being, tired of thinking I’m a bad/ disgusting person for my thoughts. I’ve had OCD ruin so many things for me that should have been fun. It’s ruined intercourse/ intimacy because of religious thoughts, or I keep thinking about STDs/ infections. I’ve been having panic attacks lately, something I’ve never experienced, because of life changes and it’s all gotten in the way of my structured life and it’s been very uncomfortable. Lately I’ve been feeling like I’m in danger, or nothing is real. Right now I’m fearing the most that I’m losing my mind, who I am, and I’m just so scared of my mental health getting worse and going manic or developing a dangerous mental illness. My mental health has NEVER been this bad. This is all new and it’s so scary. I was just fine a few months ago, sure I was dealing with other OCD stuff, the intrusive thoughts, the fears, the repetitive actions just to make sure something is the way I want it/ brings me comfort. But ever since my structure was changed/ ruined, it’s all been downhill. I just finished an EMT program, and that messed with me. Saw/ experienced things I’ve never done before and man, it’s really messed with me. Working on getting a new job in healthcare but still don’t have insurance so getting a new OCD specialized therapist has been difficult. Can someone relate just so I don’t feel like I’m crazy?..
I feel like im loosing my mind. I feel like i experience derealization or what. I feel confused like very very confused. I cant even think normally. Im just tired. I feel like im loosing myself. Im scared that everyone tells me that i have OCD, but what if this is all true? I dont think and im scared that other so-ocd sufferers dont feel this way as i do. I feel literally, LITERALLY so convinced that this must be true. It feels like i already accepted that this is true. Im done. My brain is broken. I even started to have thoughts like what if i have schizophrenia or dissociative identity disorder. Help me please. Do i have psychosis or what?
im not diagnosed, but these past two days have been terrible. i constantly have this underlying feeling that i might do something that i think is gross and i feel like i can’t do anything on my own because otherwise i might do something wrong. like i feel like i constantly have to be in front of people so that i can make sure of my every action. this is so exhausting and I’m so confused. and like i keep getting terrible images and stuff replaying in my head. i also try to recall what happened but i feel like i have false event too. i used to have religious ocd and that eventually stopped completely, but now it feels like all my work getting over that was pointless. also like i feel like i might have contamination ocd but not the typical germ type. I just get terrible images and I can’t remember if those images are true or not even though they’re impossible and i feel terrible. I don’t know if i could ever get over this because even the thought of it is terrible.
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