- Username
- 7710 ❤️
- Date posted
- 2y ago
Hello— Sounds like you are going through an incredible difficult time. ROCD is exhausting. It is very miserable and it causes you to question everything. For me with ROCD I personally do not tell my partner my specific thoughts. I say “I am having anxiety right now” and he has learned to not ask about the specifics because when I tell him it’s confessing/reassuring. This is something we have learned over many months though. Something I tell myself is I do not like to make decisions in this state of mind. Allow yourself to do the work. If anything being in this relationship is a perfect opportunity to do ERP because it is forcing you to confront your OCD.
It doesn’t stop! I really believe I don’t love him! How can I get my love back! Can ROCD really do this!?
It is a wild ride. ROCD literally can change everything you think and feel related to your theme. It is horrible and heartbreaking. But there is hope with treatment.
I’m constantly stuck feeling this way… I can’t remember the last time I felt love for him…. I don’t wanna break up! I had a dream I was arguing with my partner and I asked my friend what it meant. She said I have some unresolved issues with my partner or that I need to tell him how I truly feel. I know if I broke up with him I would cry my eyes out bc I don’t wanna break up!! I wanna fix issues that we have. My mental state is beyond bad! I am stuck in my own head 24 hours a day for 2 years! I had moments where I truly knew I loved him and was actually happy. But in the bad of my mind I still obsessed.
@7710 ❤️ Awe it is so painful. I also think it can be hard talking to well intentioned friends/loved ones because if they do not know OCD they provide a bunch of reassurance/advice that is not helpful. Sounds like you really need to start doing ERP
Also I have been in your shoes. When I first learned of this I was frantic and it was horrible. As you start to learn the tools you begin to heal and have better days. We are here with you in this.
I need to.. I really do.. I want to get better… I just can’t do this anymore I can’t.. there was times I thought death would bring me freedom on a couple of occasions. This pain hurts… my head is all mixed up. I know I still love him but the feeling of not love him is so very strong. I just hear so many things and feel nothing but negativity… I don’t want to see him with someone else… I really don’t. Whenever I say I don’t wanna break up I always hear it’s bc I don’t wanna hurt him… 😢 Most of the time my nerves are shot that my hands shake uncontrollably. Yesterday I kept hugging him.
Awe you are not alone. There is hope. I know it doesn’t feel like that now but there is always hope. We are all here for you. You are really in the thick of the anxiety and that is incredibly painful. I have been there. I have wanted to die because of how horrible I felt. But I promise you ERP can work. It’s not fun but it works.
It sounds like you are experiencing difficult symptoms! I hope you know there can be relief in doing Exposure Response Prevention! ai have many members who are dealing with similar thoughts and have made a lot of progress with ERP!
Would you guys take Fedelis??
Why do I feel healed?! That’s why I’m stuck believing I don’t love him… I’m stuck believing I’m convincing myself or forcing myself to love him…
How can I believe that this is ROCD when there are some proof? Like… I know my ROCD could have exaggerated things.. I know when I am calm I love him and hug him. But this morning was bad.. I started crying when he told me he loved me… before he got of the car I hugged him super hard… I can’t shake this off… I wanna accept his flaws… when I don’t overthink I know I love him.. some parts of him I know I dislike and I told him what thoses things are…. I know relationships go thru rough patches.. I wanna fix it! It’s like my brain is trying to force me to run away.. My friend told me that my relationship is fine. It’s just both of our mental states are to blame for why our relationship is struggling…. I just want my relationship back.. if we break up.. I don’t know if I can handle another relationship again.. I can’t… I just don’t want to
I don’t think I have ROCD anymore.. I believe I have fallen out of love with my partner… 💔 I still do compulsions and try to test myself but it doesn’t work anymore. I think about my happy moments and cry bc I want that to be the true me… I am just at this point convinced I don’t love him the same way anymore.. that ROCD just tricked me… I don’t feel numb but I am unhappy.. I cry randomly but not as much. I just… believe in am with him to avoid hurting him.. I’m just worried I don’t wanna admit it.. 😞 Can ROCD do this? Or can a relationship be saved even if I fell out of love!? I just know I am mentally exhausted. I even wanted to say I love you to him but didn’t bc of how bad this is… felt that I had no right…
hi so i am pretty new to discovering ocd and trying to figure out why i am feeling the way i am feeling. i’ve never been diagnosed with ocd and honestly thought my anxiety was just super bad until it started affecting the way i saw my relationship. i’ve never had this bad of anxiety in my relationship and around november of last year is whenever i started noticing the cycle of repeated thoughts of “should i break up with him?” ive been with my boyfriend for almost two years. yes we’ve been through our ups and downs and our relationship has overall been such a beautiful relationship (super healthy compared to old ones) we love each other deeply and communicate and just overall find ways to help improve our relationship healthier and i’ve had a doubt here and there throughout these years but since last November i started feeling disconnected with him a little. i started to question sometimes if i really loved him. other times i told myself and asked myself if i should break up with him. if we really loved each other. i started focusing on his features a lot more. to the point where these thoughts around him made me feel so extremely uncomfortable. i’ve done all my research trying to figure out if I love him or not and trying to find reassurance and other people stories to see if they feel the same way I would also see how I feel whenever I was around him and it got to a point where I overall just felt very disconnected with him and a lot of different forms. I sometimes will forget about these thoughts and I will go out through my week throughout my days and I won’t even think about them and then something good will happen actually and it will trigger that immediate thought or sometimes we’re not even doing anything we’re just hanging out and being together and that will trigger the thought of wanting to break up with him and it makes me extremely uncomfortable and it makes me panic gives me anxiety and it just stresses me out because I know it’s not true, but my brain has tried to fully convince myself it is. I was doing really good and I figured out how healthy I wanted this relationship to be recently and because we’ve been so stressed on talking about our relationship and moving on even further and growing together, it started coming back and now I’m very very anxious again. I also have this type of anxiety of obsessing over things such as my health. When it comes to my gut health to my skin I have a very bad habit of having perfectionism not only within, my body face and everything around what is myself. I have a lot of anxieties, and I always thought it was just very severe anxiety until when I was researching why I was doubting my love for my boyfriend I heard of ROCD and I was super curious to know if I even have OCD, I brought it up with my psychiatrist and she doesn’t think that I have any. I have so much anxiety over this I feel like it’s physically and mentally controlling my body from how much it’s overwhelming me. I don’t know what to do. I keep convincing myself it’s not even RCOD and maybe I truly don’t love him but I have no other proof or feelings that that could be true. It’s just a thought that circles in my head and no matter how many reassurance I give myself it will come back within an hour, if someone could please give some advice I will have my own therapy session here soon and I’m very excited to know how I can overcome this
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