I don’t know what to do

I really need some advice right now so please if your readying this just tell me how you feel or what you think could help. So I have many types of ocd and have been struggling for a year now but a couple months ago everything seemed to ease a little and I was happy with myself again but recently I fell into a spiral about my sexuality and then I figured that out too and thought okay good another issue gone but then all week I’ve been constantly having panic attacks and worrying all night about relationships. Now I don’t know if this is connected to ocd but I’m pretty sure it is but basically I constantly get scared and dread being in a relationship even though I want to at the same time? Thinking of being in a relationship with someone gives me terrible anxiety like I don’t even now how I’d function or how I would show affection. The thought of making out and having sex scares me but then when once a day il be in a good mood and change my mind and think no I want to it will be fun. And it’s a constant spiral and it’s making me want to never be in a relationship ever it’s just so scary to me. I’m 15 and have never been in a relationship but I’m too scared to even talk to boys. Can someone help I’ve told my parents I think I have ocd and they don’t believe me:(

elevenofferings

Date posted: 3y

Hey Carly! I totally understand that this can feel like a scary and frustrating situation. OCD loves to "theme jump" and can latch onto anything that is important to us. OCD is ego-dystonic, meaning it goes against the things in life that we may truly value. We have hundreds of thoughts per day that we let pass through our mind without becoming obsessive. But sometimes we will have an intrusive thought that becomes quite sticky and the moment we begin responding to it, the rumination spiral can begin. OCD tends to center upon a desire for certainty. Part of our journey to recovery rests in truly embracing the unknowns in life. I would certainly bring up to your therapist that relationship OCD seems to be the current theme you are experiencing. They will be able to create some exposures that incorporate some intrusive thoughts you have been experiencing. Just know that this is just part of the journey and healing is not linear. Wishing you all the best!

Carly0022

Date posted: 3y

Thank you x

Carly0022

Date posted: 3y

Also can you have relationship ocd and not be in a relationship?

an0nym0us

Date posted: 3y

@Carly0022 yes you can have rocd without being in a relationship! it applies to friendships too if anything. i’m in my first real relationship and i was worried about all those things too. i feared that i wouldn’t be “experienced” enough or be able to show affection but your partner would help you through that! i was fortunate enough that my boyfriend was my friend for 2 years previously but it still made me nervous because he had dated before. sex scared me too, i was scared of all these stories but it wasn’t bad when you trust that person. don’t rush into a relationship! i didn’t start dating till my senior year :) boys around 15 are sometimes immature too so don’t worry too much about it! and with your parents it’s a struggle because my mom doesn’t understand my brothers ocd but because of my mental health from a few years ago she’s trying to take it seriously

Carly0022

Date posted: 3y

@an0nym0us Thank you so much x this has really helped me a lot. I know I want to experience relationships it just so so scary but I have hope that once I meet the right person and explain my situation to them hopefully I will find someone that will understand and love me. And your right about the teenage boy thing they are super immature and in 1 of my only relationships I’ve had he basically only went out with me for my looks so that could of caused this including childhood issues. But yes thank you x

an0nym0us

Date posted: 3y

@Carly0022 no ofc! i’m extremely grateful that my boyfriend is patient with me because idk how he handles it. you definitely got this! your fear is completely valid and normal but it’ll get easier :)

maya_hockey1728

Date posted: 25w

I need help

So basically, I don’t know when this started, but basically whenever I look at a girl, a girl on a phone screen, or even a cartoon that’s a girl, I have this weird tendency that I like them, even though I’m straight. And though I am fairly young (still a teen), I’m positive that I’m straight, but my mind is giving me these weird feelings and signals that I’m not. And disclaimer, I do not have a problem with people with other kinds of sexualities, but I am feared for my life about this. I’ve honestly been keeping these tough emotions and feelings in me for days now. I don’t want to tell my mom because I don’t want her to think bad of me, and we also live in a Catholic household, so the thought of having a different sexuality is a lot on us. I’ve done some of my research, and since I’ve had many different types of OCD for quite some time, I’ve come to the conclusion that apparently I have SO-OCD or HOCD (basically the same thing.) I don’t know if this is true or not. But some other websites have told me that it’s just a part of being a teenager and growing up, and finding what love interest suits you the most, but I honestly have no pleasure with this whatsoever! I constantly think about, “oh, what if you like this girl right there?” Every time I walk past a girl, and sometimes my mind agrees with it, but deep down I don’t want this. And even sometimes, when I’m watching a video, or looking at boys in real life, looking at boy cartoon characters, most of the time, my mind tells me, “this boy is cute. I am attracted to him.” But other times, I completely disagree with that statement. Same with girls, so I don’t know. And also my mind tells me, or something in me tells me that the guys at school that I like, I don’t like them anymore, and instead I look at the girls, in which I know that I’m not attracted to, so it’s just a continuous cycle like that and I don’t know how to stop it. Someone please help because I don’t really know how to explain this, it’s just tough on me.

J.E

Date posted: 22w

Idk what to do at this point any tips help.

Hi I’m 17. My life since I was born has been full of exploring and tons and tons of hobbies. I have adhd. But about 1 year ago is when it kinda started or at least when I started to notice these thoughts and compulsions. I got in a relationship with my girlfriend. And about 2 weeks into that relationship my I started thinking “what if I don’t love her” and I didn’t even know that that’s what ocd was at the time and it ruined with gut wrenching anxiety for months. Then I started titling it as ocd. After we broke up I started to notice that my ocd was starting to flare up a lot. Like when I was snowboarding and normally when I was having the most fun is when I would ask myself things like “what if I hate this” “what if I’m not having fun” then I would try to feel if I was having fun. I would use chat gpt a lot to try and help it but it didn’t really help. I have lots of other ocd thoughts aswell but at the time this one really caused be anxiety and I just felt numb and I became not social. To this day I’m still not as social and I don’t feel like myself anymore. This is the opposite of who I was a year ago. Then I started questioning everything I do and people I love. So it feels like from the moment I wake up my mind just starts spiraling. I can’t seem to find peace or joy in anything anymore and I just feel like my life is going to continue like this and I’ll never be happy. I’ve accepted it at this point. I would love some help. I haven’t really told anyone I know so any tips would be appreciated. I’d be surprised if you even read this far haha. I’m also Christian and love to approach things from a Christian standpoint. I don’t want to sound like a baby who isn’t experiencing real ocd and it’s hard to put into words how much it affects me I just really hope yall understand and can help.

Adi7

Date posted: 17w

Advice please ❤️

Hi ❤️ I’m really struggling right now I’m in my sophomore year of Highschool and I’ve finally started planning or thinking abt my future (for context I was extremely depressed and suicidal from 6-9th grade) After conquering my depression this is a huge leap for me and I’m proud of myself ❤️ But there’s something still holding me down :( and I’m not sure what to do anymore that thing is OCD. Since 6th grade I have had strong and invasive intrusive thoughts all the time they scare me so bad and make me feel as though I’m not even real anymore :( I’m sick of taking the time to do ridiculous compulsions to rid or ease these thoughts it’s a waste of time and energy and it hurts me so bad I feel like I will never get to just live my life without this :( How can I plan my future when I can’t even find myself in this mess of anxiety 💔 I’m so tired of fighting my mental health it’s been years from anxiety attacks to sh to survived suicide attempts (I got help dw❤️‍🩹) and recovery there. Just to be thrown into a storm of awful scary sickening thoughts day and night-when can I just be a normal teenager and possibly a happy adult? How do I conquer this so I can love myself to the fullest and live my life free and happy? :( ❤️❤️‍🩹 I’m so scared to talk to my parents about it I’m ashamed of my thoughts and every time I bring it up they just say I shouldn’t be diagnosing myself or it’s just ADHD. It really really hurts me they have no idea how awful this feels and it makes me feel so alone sometimes 💔

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