- Date posted
- 5y ago
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Rumination is the compulsion. Its the "why am I having thoughts about suicide all the time? Does this mean I want to kill myself? How can I be sure I dont want to kill myself?" On and on and on. The obsession is around suicide. So do exposure around the obsession not the rumination. If you afraid if knives and you threw all the knives in your house out go somewhere you could buy a knife. Maybe buy a knife when your ready. Cut vegetables with the knife etc. If your compulsions are all mental then induce the scary thought. Maybe read about suicide so it triggers your anxiety. Then try and sit with it. Note dont turn reading about suicide into a compulsion where you are reading about it to try and "figure it out". Ocd can be sneaky like that.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Same:( Thy are def intrusive for me, but at the same time, my level of agreement/anxiety with them changes. Like sometimes it’ll pop up and I’m really depressed that day and I think “not going to do it, but that sounds peaceful,” whereas other times I am fed up/upset with the thought and don’t understand why I’m thinking about it.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Yes fears about whether I want to ir should kill myself have been major ocd theme for me for a long time. I will have vivid instrusive thoughts about cutting or shooting myself. The reality is I dont want to kill myself. If you do please seek help for that. If its an ocd fear the best thing to do is accept the thoughts and try to be okay with them. They will lessen over time as you train yourself to do this. Ill sometimes say to myself "maybe I do want to kill myself maybe I dont, so what". The trick is to feel your anxiety and not give into the compulsion. For me the compulsion is either rumination or putting myself in situation where I could kill myself to see if I really want to or not. I once went so far as to walk on a bridge and look down into the water to see if I wanted to live or not (do not do this!!).
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Wait .... how do you do exposure for rumination?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Yes I get these as well
Related posts
- Date posted
- 19w ago
I’m having a very bad evening with my intrusive thoughts. I was doing really good dealing with them but tonight one hit me hard. I’ve been having a lot of different intrusive thoughts but I’ll have one occasionally about hurting my mom or my dog who I love and they’re the only family I have in my life. They’re my world. I was helping my mom put away the dishes and I had the big kitchen knife in my hand and my intrusive thought was you could stab your mom. And then my brain said I had a twitch in my hand and that meant I wanted to do it. Let me just say that I wouldn’t hurt a fly. I actually caught a fly in a glass and put it outside instead of killing it this evening before this intrusive thought happened. I’m such a gentle and compassionate and caring person and these thoughts instantly cause me to have a panic attack. And I have no one to talk to them about. I know they’re hard for my mom to hear and I don’t want to be any more of a burden than I already am. I do desperately want to tell her and have her reassure me that I’m not crazy or a psycho. Then my thoughts wander to if your hand did flinch could you be a psychopath. Is hurting someone in you. I know it’s not but I feel like my mind is out to get me and hurt me. I’m working so hard and I thought I was doing so good but I need to know why I have these thoughts. They’re not ok. I need someone to help me make sense of why. I know we aren’t supposed to ruminate but I shouldn’t have thoughts like this about people I love and care about the most in the world.
- Date posted
- 15w ago
I’m sharing this bc I need advice or even support from anyone who can relate. If you can’t relate and don’t think you’ll say anything helpful or kind pls don’t comment anything… I’ve been struggling with somethings that’s making me question myself. There has been moments while self pleasuring when I get intrusive thoughts, in those moments it feels like I’m enjoying or even self pleasuring myself bc of the thought. Right after I immediately have an anxiety attack and my HEART drops bc it feels terrible I feel like a disgusting monster :( ppl have told me I haven’t done a bad bc of how intense my guilt and panic are but I keep thinking that MAYBE I made a horrible decision in the moment and the guilt is just realising that it’s just wrong this doesn’t make sense to me because I’ve always told myself that I would never act on this in 1 million years and I’ve been known that these things are wrong so I’m just like constantly questioning myself these feelings and exact same situation has happened two times already I even promised myself that I wouldn’t act on anything beforehand and yeah, I still felt like I did act on my thought during my alone time I’m genuinely convinced that I’m a horrible and it’s even got into the point where I don’t wanna be here anymore and I don’t even think this is my OCD :( tbh
- Date posted
- 14w ago
I struggle so bad with intrusive thoughts. They can be so bad that I'll cry because I KNOW that's not how I feel or want to do. (Too embarrassed to say what they're about) I'll constantly try to figure out why I have them, and constantly figure out what they mean, causing me to constantly circle around and around. I had to get on anxeity meds, which helped a little but the thoughts still happen. How do you help yourself with this? How do you know that you're just not some physcopath? 😅
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