how much should i share?

Hey I’m sorry you’re dealing with this! Remember that confessing your themes and “bad thoughts” is a form of reassurance and also can add to your own stress level. It is okay to keep some of your thoughts or themes to yourself and disclose what feels the most comfortable for you. Putting the worrying thoughts you might not feel comfy sharing into a journal he won’t read is ideal so you aren’t keeping them inside of you, making yourself suffer more than need be. There’s a way to disclose what you are going through without making it all consuming for either person involved :) sharing articles can help or maybe even sharing some books if you are able to.

I see you and feel you so deeply. I want you to know that sharing your struggles is one of the most vulnerable things you can do so I understand why it's scary to consider. You can still share it with your partner and help them understand your themes and how you deal with them. It's up to you how much you want to share - watch out for compulsive reassurance and I'm sure it'll be okay 🫂

Just be mindful of both of your boundaries. Your partner will probs understand if there are just some things you don’t want to talk about bc it’s personal or distressing.

Ive shared most of my themes or thoughts with my fiancée mostly because I can’t really afford therapy but also because it helps him understand better of where I am at. There’s been plenty of times where I’ve vented to him and he literally goes “honestly hun, if I was in your shoes I’d have a mental breakdown more often then you do. Your strong” it also helps that he suffers from intrusions as well so he has a understanding and guides me to what he would do if he got that thought.

Hi there I’m sorry your going through this:/ Personally I didn’t tell my partner about my rocd. He knows I struggle with ocd , anxiety and depression but doesn’t know the exact theme. For me it has been working. I feel like I saved myself from a lot of painful conversations and possibly my partner not understanding. He could absolutely try to be compassionate and try to understand but I feel like it’s never gonna be understood from their perspective. Basically he knows I’m going through something and he’s here to comfort me when I need it without him feeling as hurt. He hurts from seeing me in pain but he would hurt most if he knew the truth. It may not work for everyone but it’s been working for me. Wish you the best and I hope you find what the best thing to do for your relationship:)