All of this happen in like 5 minutes I felt false atraction (If I can call it false) with little anxiety, then I got anxious about not being anxious, then I saw the picture again and felt anxious and then I blink and didn't feel anxious and then I saw the picture again and felt anxious (but during this whole procces I was feeling like it wasn't anxious enought for it to be OCD and that I'm actually on denial)
Hi, glad you decided to share how you are feeling! OCD is characterized by obsessions & compulsions. Obsessions are intrusive, unwanted, recurrent, distressing thoughts and compulsions are repetitive behaviors that one engages in whether mental or physical to relieve the distress of anxiety. Do you feel you struggle with this or do you feel you have more generalized anxiety thoughts? I would either way, encourage you to sit with your anxiety, rather then push it away and not get rid of your anxiety. Anxiety is not a bad thing, it's okay to feel anxious. An anxiety disorder is when that fight/flight response is triggered more often than it should be (mis-firing). Hope this helps :)
Do you blink to get rid of anxiety? That may be a compulsion. Wondering about your OCD can also be a compulsion. It's good you are aware of what's happening before and after you look at a picture. Maybe work with a NOCD therapist to expose yourself to the uncertainty that you may or may not be attracted to this person.
These past few days I was fine. Minimal intrusive thoughts ,no anxiety etc(to add I'm on medication so maybe it's starting to work although it barely is 2 weeks) and today I got a sudden wave of anxiety and it started latching on some thoughts like" what if I'm in denial and I wanna break up with my bf? And what if erp doesn't work for me because I actually wanna break up with my bf?" But they didn't really stay long usually those thoughts would make me spiral for days or so, now they lasted for some hours. And now I'm trying to trigger myself into being anxious again because if I don't it means I don't have ocd and if I don't have ocd it means I don't love my bf and if I don't love my bf it means I have to break up. Idk if it makes sense but the lack of anxiety makes me wonder if I actually have ocd or not.
Ughhhhhh it feels like I can’t tell between false attraction or attractive 😭 :/ idk I just saw some pics of joji and artist that makes music when he was younger (it was a post on insta) and on one of them I thought oh he looks cute here, but no I’m like omg but idk in what way tho but it felt like not false attraction like I thought or meant it in another way and I. Felt that and then kinda freaked out bc idk if it’s weird and then I felt groinals and *sigh*
So, yesterday while I was laying in bed, I was relaxing when suddenly I had an intrusive thought about someone, but the thing is that it brought me a sense of enjoyment or calmness for a few seconds before it went away. Once it did, it was only until hours later when I realized what had happened and I began to freak out because I'm reading everywhere that when someone experiences this type of thing, the anxiety happens shortly after the enjoyment or "false" enjoyment. Can OCD do this?
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