Hi, I’m hoping someone can help me please. Does anyone have any resources for loved ones to help them understand OCD and how to help (not reassure). My parents are struggling to understand what I’m dealing with, and I don’t really know how to explain to them. They also don’t understand why giving reassurance would be unhelpful for recovery.
My husband and I have been navigating our son’s severe SCRUP/OCD for about six months now and his NOCD therapist and ERP exercises are extremely helpful. We are currently reading Understanding Scrupulosity by Thomas M Santa, The Doubting Disease by Joseph W Ciarrocchi, A Thousand Frightening Fantasies by William Van Ornum and Jesus and OCD by Charles Thompson. We used to read these with our son but that is considered assurance-seeking/accommodating so now it’s just for us parents for more insight. Any other way we can help just ask. All the best on your journey to recovery!
@Waipahu1 Wow thank you so much for taking the time to respond. Scrupulosity is exactly what I’m dealing with, and my parents who are also christian just can’t understand. I’m going to give these resources a shot, thank you soooo much!!! Hope your son’s recovery improves and he is doing better. You are awesome parents!
@Waipahu1 If you don’t mind and are comfortable could you share what some of the erp excercises are he’s doing to recovery from the Scrupulosity. I’m working with a biblical coach right now, but she is not a therapist and I’m needing to do the erp on my own just not sure of any examples for that?
We had to learn from therapist that praying over and with our son and reading scripture almost constantly was NOT helping. It’s accommodating his compulsions. We are Christian and were unsure about taking NOCD therapist’s advice about forsaking all things spiritually for a while where concerning him. But it seems to be working. Not sure of your level of severity but my son says to caution you about starting ERP alone and how hard it is for him to practice on his own and also your anxiety will increase some but that it does get better if you’re more determined to do the exercises daily. Say something that triggers you over and over again until the anxiety decreases by half. He gives as an example- “I am a sinner” or “Maybe I will go to hell”.
@Waipahu1 God bless you guys, thank you so much for sharing. I appreciate the insight from you guys very much, this is so helpful 🙏🏻. https://scrupulosity.com This link is the one to the coaching I’m using. Some articles might be helpful to you guys as well with the topic of Scrupulosity. Thank you again, appreciate your time and advice!! <3
My son says, “When you give into compulsions or are being accommodated by your parents you build up a resistance to the compulsions and accommodations and as a result you will give into compulsions more and need even more accommodations.” It’s a vicious cycle.
We started with the free OCD help w/Jaimie Eckert too and subscribe to her emails! All great for helping loved ones understand.
@Waipahu1 That is awesome! <3
Listen, I totally get it. It’s hard to hear a loved one obsessing over small, insignificant things. My mom tries to be supportive, but she gets so mad when I tell her what’s on my mind, and she just yells at me and says I’m crazy for thinking like this. So, I just sent her this, and I hope it helps: Mom, I know it’s really hard, but when I’m suffering with OCD thoughts, all I need is sympathy. Getting mad at someone for having OCD is like getting mad at someone for having a head injury. Please understand that I can’t help it, or else I would stop it. I need someone to say, “I’m so sorry that’s bothering you this much. It must be so overwhelming. It must be so hard to cope with this.” You could even ask me questions, like “What does it feel like? How much are you thinking about this? What helps you feel better?” I just need someone to validate my experience and sympathize, not tell me that I’m crazy or say my problems aren’t real. I’m aware these thoughts are crazy — that’s why I feel so alone and sad and scared. When you tell me my thoughts are crazy, it makes me feel even more like a freak. Sometimes, I just need someone to hold my hand and tell me I’m not alone.
Hello i got this app hoping to maybe find some support for my partner i thought about reddit but reddit has become a hateful place and i figured this is a safe place. i love my partner more than anything and he’s been struggling with OCD his whole life he has a hard time talking about it with anyone because it’s too painful he’s stated that it’s gotten worse as he’s gotten older His biggest issue right now is overwhelming thoughts of his actions having tragic outcomes and being unable to stop these obsessive thoughts (such as needing to check out door handle 5 times to make sure it’s locked but still panicking that it’s unlocked) he’s not open to one on one therapy or meds although he loves learning and watching informative videos i fear he’s afraid to confront his OCD or just afraid nothing will help i really wanna help him live a stress free and happy life he deserves it would anyone possibly have any ways to naturally help with OCD or recommend any great individuals that could share techniques on managing OCD or helping your partner with OCD? i would very much appreciate it!
Someone I care about has OCD, he often gets worried to answer certain things in fear that he might be wrong or gets anxious in times when certain conversations such as dealing with negative emotions come into play and in the event something goes wrong even though we deal with the issue it takes him a long time to put himself back together. Often times worried about his image, hyper focused on being a good person etc etc. I believe I’m doing my best but as someone who doesn’t struggle with OCD I cant fully comprehend him and i wish to learn more about it, not just read it off of google. Any advice would be appreciate it. -Thank you!
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