- Date posted
- 2y
Tips
Any tips on how to let things go? It’s the weekend and I’m perseverating on work conflicts. Combo or perseverating and guilt ocd. No physical compulsions on this just mental anguish.
Any tips on how to let things go? It’s the weekend and I’m perseverating on work conflicts. Combo or perseverating and guilt ocd. No physical compulsions on this just mental anguish.
Well... This might sound crazy but the other night I walked out into the snowing weather with no shoes and just a bit of clothes and stood out there until my brain no longer paid attention to what I was obsessing over, but instead paid attention to how cold my feet were and how I wanted to go inside. That 3 or so minutes in the freezing cold helped me to break from my sympathetic nervous system and get into a different head space. I was actually perseverating (you taught me a new word) on work as well. If you can't do an ice bath like that, cardio helps to get into the body. Something like running, biking, or really anything that just gets your heart and respiratory system going, even jumping jacks. Yoga helps force you to feel your body, even the kind of painful bodily feelings, which can bring up emotions and help you process them and calm the mind. Meditating can help you observe the mind while letting it do its thing while you watch without judgment. Getting into a manual task like deep cleaning a room, a physical project like building a model, anything that takes less mind and more physical action. Exposures are going to be the best method. I don't know if you have a therapist to guide you through them but you can at least come up with your own mental exposures and try to do it yourself. Getting out of the house also could be a great idea. I think what I'm getting at is exposures are always #1, but getting into your body and out of your head as much as you can is a helpful addition.
Thank you so much for such a lengthy response. I actually got a little emotional reading it and how thorough it is. I’ve done extensive erp for my compulsions but I’m not as sure on how to do them on mental obsessions and regulations of emotional responses. I just bought a book on pure o that I hope will give some insight. It took a long time to conquer the physical compulsions and I never thought that would be possible so I guess there is some hope there. I know exercise is key but I’ve been having difficulty motivating this winter. I’m hoping your reminder will give me a jump start. I can definitely try shocking my system with the cold. Thank you so much
If you try shocking your system with cold, just be safe about it. I wasn't out for long, and I don't suggest going out and getting frost bite ☺️ you can alternatively take an ice bath (I would look up how to do this). But all of those other options for getting out of your head are also good choices. I understand not being motivated to exercise. Maybe think of it as a survival response at the moment. Instead of making yourself establish a workout routine for the long term, maybe agree to doing it for the next day or two to get you out of your head space. Then at least you've done it, even if you forget to do it in 3 or 4 days.
I recommend ACT exercises, for example "Dropping anchor" (check you tube) it helos me a lot with my mental activity.
whats up guys what are some tips dealing with ocd and what to do when a thought makes u anxious ??
So, I know my capacity to get fixated on things. And it's normally something that's relatively remote but, my latest issue is really getting to me and I was wondering if people have any advice. I'm avoiding getting too into specifics, as I don't want this to get reassurance-y but, in essence.. I came to the realisation recently that people who I'd been "friends" (feels like the wrong term now) when I was younger were not very nice people, and normalized a lot of very unpleasant behaviour towards other members of the group. They really normalized it, sold themselves as figures of authority, as older and more responsible and grown-up than others, and looking back, they acted horribly. And coming to this realisation, that I'd been manipulated into just accepting their behaviour has just... broken me. My OCD has latched onto it and I can't stop feeling irreversibly tainted by it. I've talked to others about it, and they've reassured me, told me it's not a big deal and that I hold myself to too high a standard, but none of that sticks. I feel better for a bit, then think 'Maybe when you told them you were skewing it to make yourself look better' or 'Did you leave out a crucial detail'. I keep ruminating over and over, trying to remember exactly how everything played out, trying to figure out if I fed into the behaviour, if I did something bad myself (because y'know, I feel like I was accepting of it at the time, so what does it say about my own values?). I know I need to stop doing all this if I want to improve, but then some part of me keeps saying 'So, you're just going to let yourself off the hook then?' Normally, I can rationalize my own fears to some degree, assure myself something won't happen, but the realness of the situation, and the fact I only came to understand the reality of it because the thought had been bothering me means it feels so much more all-encompassing. I know confessing in itself is a compulsion, but I keep feeling that if I'm not I'm somehow concealing what I 'really am' from others around me, and any positive interactions are me deceiving them in some way. I feel like I can't enjoy anything in life right now, and a good part of me feels I should not enjoy it ever again. If anybody has any advice on it, I'm all ears. Or even hearing if you relate to these feelings, I might appreciate the solidarity at least.
I’m new to the app and wanting to know who else experiences this form of ocd. Some background I was a therapist for over 10 years now I am out of the clinical space. So I have background knowledge of ocd but never knew much about relationship ocd. I realized over the last several years with my now fiancé, that I have a hard time just letting go in general, whether that’s an argument or statement or feeling. I want to be able to just accept things at face value and move on (and talk later if my partner is ready as needed). But when conflict arises I can’t disengage till there is a clear resolution. It’s causing serious strife as he can feel trapped and it escalates the argument. I am reading more and this sounds like relationship OCD. Anyone else experience this? Curious on what others have done to work on this for themselves. I do have a therapist but we are not doing work in this area yet as I am realizing this is an actual concern.
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