What should I do if my OCD thought torments me with intense pain and regret? I would’ve never had this regret if I didn’t have OCD, so how should I respond to it? Should I respond to it in a way that would decrease the painful feeling, or should I just feel the pain everytime I think abt it?
Feeling it without judgement is a good start. If the way you try decreasing the painful feeling comes from a place of urgency and "this needs to be done now" it's probably a compulsion. It takes effort, but allowing the feeling to be there and then not focusing on it, not letting it have any weight in how you go about your day, helps to decrease how often it impacts you. It's like when you're online and see an opinion of someone on the internet that's hateful or wrong; if you engage with the commenter, you give the argument legitimacy. Acknowledging it and "scrolling past" it, though difficult, is a good step. The commenter only has power if you respond to it and let them feed their argument, same with the thoughts and feelings. They dont go away - the comment is still there - but the power it's got lessens I hope this analogy helps!
@Caeles Thanks for the tip! This was very helpful! So whenever I’m enjoying myself, my brain basically tells me ‘if you didn’t do this, you would be so much happier now’. This counts as an intrusive thought right?
@DillonLee Yup, maybe! Definitely sounds like one. And allowing for uncertainty would be to respond "maybe I'd be happier, maybe I wouldn't, but I'm gonna keep going on like I have been"
@Caeles sometimes that thought pains me a lot and prevents me from enjoying myself, no matter how hard I try to ignore it. It’s crazy cus it’s a regret I never would’ve had if I didn’t have OCD
@DillonLee Yeah it's hard. And it can be frustrating when what's bothering you feels like something that shouldn't bother you but now suddenly and uncontrollably it is. But the steps to allowing yourself uncertainty helps ease how often and to what extent the thought persists
@Caeles Exactly how I feel! I’m so glad someone understands this pain
@Caeles If I just get on with my life without doing any exposures or compulsions, will the intrusive thoughts get quieter over time? The reason I’m not doing exposures is because my OCD only gets triggered in a certain game that I don’t play anymore and isn’t important to my life.
@DillonLee - Not doing compulsions is the main way I think it'll quiet down. Doing exposures helps to ensure that they remain quieter over time; its not a perfect guarantee, because relapses happen even with things that seem "solved" or less stressful. But in this case with the trigger being something that can be avoided without a major change in your day to day life, it may be that going on with your life can work fine. Exposures may help ensure that you can interact with the trigger with less distress later on and could be beneficial but in the end that's up to you
@Caeles Thanks for your advice! I was feeling anxious on whether this was counted as avoidance
@DillonLee - I'll admit it could still be avoidance. Maybe some exposures on the specific topic outside the setting of the game would be good, but also doing something that's meant to be recreational and fun that causes anxiety doesn't seem like a fun alternative. I would suggest looking up therapists advice and seeing if there are other things you can/should do. Hope this helps!
@Caeles what could be some exposures I could do outside the game?
@DillonLee It depends on the game/topic, so roughly, figure out what in the game causes the trigger and find ways to isolate it. For example if we're playing, say, the last of us, and it's the disease/clickers/mushroom people that are triggering, isolate that and work on maybe some contamination exposures, such as not checking for cleanliness or over washing hands. Whatever it is that causes the trigger in game, and whatever the obsession latches onto, find where it may exist outside that story line and (starting small) work through those specific things bit by bit. I'd highly suggest finding some of the tools on here to create exposures or doing some quick searches on what therapists suggest for exposure therapy cause it's different person to person and there's no one way to do an exposure, so a little research might help
@Caeles I think for mine it is symmetry, but the thing is I’m not bothered by things being unsymmetrical in real life, only in the game. Sometimes, it’s just obsessing about a bad decision I made, not abt symmetry, so might be pure O
What to do when we feel guilty about our ocd checking and compulsive behaviors?
I’m currently struggling with guilt from checking OCD. By this I mean, I feel guilty and shameful by my OCD checking because I feel as that was immoral and wrong and I really don’t know what to do. How can I fight this?
So, my brain brought up a question that really affected my worldview. I solved the obsession, and gained some good wisdom on that could be useful towards unconditional loving self acceptance. Maybe I was being OCD about recovery, and tried to find logical reasons for why progress is important no matter the outcome when I should've just embraced uncertainty. So now I have an answer to the Obsession. But this obsession took me to a pretty dark place. And I know OCD is just gonna throw and equally Bad one at me if I use this information to my benefit because it will essentially be reinforcing the OCD cycle. "Oh, he got the solution he needed to now I need to throw a new obsession at his way." So what do I do with the wisdom I gained from ruminating here? It's useful and practical information, so I don't want to throw it out. But I can't reinforce the ocd cycle.
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