Why is my partner the theme of my OCD.

My partner proves to me each day how much he loves me. He is kind, patient, and most importantly present. Even so, I obsess over the small flaws and convince myself he isn’t good or he is a “liar.” It’s almost as if i self sabotage and will believe the fears in my head to the point where I am obsessing that he isn’t the one. The constant theme was planted in my head when his EX 2.5 years ago called him a Narcissist because he no longer wanted to be with her. Now every time something isn’t perfect i obsess over that term and convince myself he is a bad person over very minor things. please help me. i love him and he sticks by my side even when i’m in an obsession. I have shared these thoughts with him and he will sit there and go through the characteristics of a “Narcissist” and will logically help me see that he doesn’t fit that description to help me cope. He is good. I just want to be happy with him rather, him being my theme. My ocd attacks all things I love the most.

Nica

Date posted: 2y

Because you care about your partner and OCD latches onto things we care about.

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

Look up Sheryl Pauls website “conscious transitions” she has a whole program that covers this topic. Its under relationship anxiety. I had the same fears. And just a little tip, your fears and thoughts actually have nothing to do/very little to do with your partner 🙂 I had the same fears and thoughts about my now husband. That program was a saving grace.

hellopeople

User type: NOCD Alumni

Date posted: 2y

I’m sorry you’re going through this. Even if he acted like a narcissist at one point, can you forgive him and move in the direction of a healthy relationship? OCD makes us think it’s all or nothing but that’s a lie! Relationships are tricky, OCD demands perfection that nobody, not even the sufferers can attain! I hope things get better for you! Stopping compulsions is difficult

Angel20

Date posted: 2y

I’m sorry you’re going through this. My ocd is focused on my wonderful husband so I completely understand how hard it is. I wish it would switch themes or focus on me, he doesn’t deserve this, he’s never done anything wrong

aservello

Date posted: 2y

I will. Thank you for this feedback. I felt a sense of relief for a second, finally. I am struggling and need any help 😣

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