i know there’s some therapy like exposure and response but how will that work for me? like im so scared of e. coli that i will shower with BLEACH to kill that awful bacteria… i want this to be over, i hate having these burns. i hate these headaches from the smell. i hate it all. i can’t live like this anymore.
I think you can get over it. But please try NOCD therapy. And meditations geared towards anxiety and OCD. And OCD podcasts. Plus this book about “Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts” which you can find here: https://a.co/d/0deXnaw
I can relate because I have contamination ocd and have a fear of a similar illness...the fears and compulsions were taking over my life, but it DID get better with ERP. I also take medication (Luvox) that helps a lot. So I just want you to know you're not alone and there is hope for life to get better. Please let me know if there is anything I can help with or any specific questions you have!!
@Valerie123 thank you so much!! 💖 how long did it take to get better?
@fae_luv - It's definitely going to be different for every person in terms of how long it takes to have major improvements, but personally, I've been in treatment for 4 months. A family member who also has OCD recommended starting medication a month before starting ERP, and that helped because the medication can take the edge off of the anxiety of facing your fears (did for me). If you take medication, it usually needs to be titrated so you start at a lower dose and gradually increase; plus, it takes a few weeks to notice effects. Once I started feeling a bit less anxious (from the Luvox), I found a therapist through NOCD. You start small and take baby steps...your therapist will work with you to decide what you can handle. For me, progress started slowly and the pace increased more and more as I felt more ready to take bigger steps at a time. But it might take a longer period of baby steps, and that's OK too. Before treatment, I had constant, highly distressing intrusive thoughts about [certain disease] and was afraid to touch things even in my own apartment (constant washing, bleaching, etc.), let alone out in public. I'm still working through some compulsions, but I'm living life again and things are going amazingly better than I could have imagined. Intrusive thoughts are at a minimum...sometimes one appears, but it doesn't control me. Anyway, I hope my answer wasn't too long. Just wanted to share how much ERP (and in my case, meds) can make a difference. Sending you lots of good energy and strength in taking on this incredibly hard illness. You got this! <3
It will work by having you gradually face your fears which will allow you to change your behaviors. It’s worth doing and it would absolutely help with your specific concern.
@Erin P ah! if it’s worth doing, i’ll definitely look more into it. i’m just scared if it’ll get me worse 😬
@fae_luv It will get you better. I know this from personal experience.
@Erin P thank you so much, did you have the same fear?
@fae_luv Different fear.
This has recently developed into something much bigger than it originally was. When this past winter season started, i noticed more people were getting the stomach bug than usual. I was fine at first, until I was noticing almost one person in every class was saying they recently had it. I researched about it, and I found what I was looking for unfortunately. Norovirus cases were surging across the U.S because of a new strain of NoV that recently had been spreading. This immediately altered my way of thinking. Everywhere I went, I would be overly cautious of what’s around me and whose around me. The first obsessive compulsive problem I had was that I couldn’t eat at lunch anymore unless I washed my hands. One time, I didn’t have an option to wash my hands, so I didn’t eat lunch. That’s when I knew it was interfering with my daily life, and it was becoming a serious issue. There was another time where some guy threw up near me in the hallway trash can. My mind was spiraling. all. day. long. It felt like it was consuming me alive. Not a minute would go by where I wouldn’t think about it, and the high possibility of me catching this virus. There’s been so many other scenarios where I feel myself losing it. I’m not the best of explaining in detail how my mind feels when it spirals, but the best thing I could say is that I could feel myself slowly losing my mind. It takes over my life. I HAVE to act on my compulsive acts, if not, i’ll have these obsessive thoughts until it consumes me whole. I’ve had nervous breakdowns, panic attacks, anxiety attacks, insomnia, and it almost feels like it’s causing me to have an eating disorder. Most recently, I went to use the bathroom and saw what looked like puke on the toilet seat. I was already using it, so I just finished my buisness and rushed out there asap. I figured, if I fasted for two days, what’s there to puke if I do catch NoV? So, I did. I missed school because on the second day of fasting, I became very dehydrated. I was weak, and couldn’t move. I realized what this all rooted back to. That’s when I knew I needed help.
(long read ahead, sorry lol) I’ve struggled with ocd for as far back as I can remember. I find that it gets worse with stress, and recently I’ve really been struggling with the contamination aspect of my ocd. I’m worried about it becoming unmanageable and negatively affecting my relationship with my partner. I’ve been living with my boyfriend since January (got kicked out of my house a week after I turned 18, it’s for the better though my house is toxic as hell) and I love living with him, but him and his family aren’t as concerned with cleaning as I am used to. My boyfriend and I have been together going on 2 years and there’s been many times throughout our relationship that his struggle with depression severely impacted his ability to keep up with cleaning his room. This is something I completely understand because I’ve struggled with it too so i’ve often helped him clean, and since i’ve moved in he’s done so much better at keeping up with cleaning (especially because he knows about my issues with clutter, mess, germs, etc.) He is really good at being accommodating towards my needs (not overly so, i’m aware that recovering includes accepting being uncomfortable), but it’s so hard for me to differentiate between what is the normal standard for cleanliness and hygiene and what’s excessive and unhealthy. I get so stressed out every single day over the thought of how dirty everything is. He has 3 cats that mainly stay in his room (he has a catio attached to his window/side of the house) and dogs which stay on the opposite side of the house and backyard, so there is fur everywhere constantly (i’m also allergic to cats but it’s not severe). I can’t stop thinking about how they are getting germs from their litter box all over everything. They also used to piss under his bed and in his closet when his room used to be a mess and it’s soaked into the floor so no matter what it stinks. It’s so hard to bring myself to walk around the house without slippers because my feet will get visibly dirty and my socks would get covered in hair. I always think about how my boyfriend sometimes walks on the rugs in the bathroom in shoes and all the germs that spreads. There’s so many more things but this is already getting long and I am shaking just thinking about how unclean everything is. I want to deep clean the entire house myself so I can get it to where It’s not like psychological torture everyday and it’s easier to maintain but I have been so busy I don’t have the time. I am worried about my boyfriend thinking I don’t like living with him or that I think that’s he’s dirty but i don’t. We have had several conversations about this and he’s reassured me that he knows none of my obsessive thoughts are personal but I still feel so bad about it. I would like to get therapy to help work through this but currently that is not an option for me. I know things will get better once I get through the main things in my life that are causing a lot of stress and therefore making my ocd flair up, but I need advice on what to do in the mean time. I keep having moments where all I can do is shake and cry and clean and I feel bad for my poor boyfriend who can only sit next to me and try to comfort me or help me clean. I also don’t want to make him worried that nothing he does is enough for me (i’ve also already talked to him about this and told him about how I can never even be clean enough for myself and that I don’t think he’s dirty). There’s been many times where I want to tell him to do things that I think might be my own unhealthy compulsions (ex. not wearing shoes in the house or in our room, not getting into bed with socks on, making sure to completely dry off before getting out the shower, put makeup and jewelry back where they belong right after using them, etc.) but i can’t tell if they’re reasonable or not and i try to not tell him unless it’s something that severely distresses me. I’m aware that everything is going to have germs no matter what and have been using NER’s to help manage my thought spirals/rumination. I know that I shouldn’t keep doing compulsions because it just offers temporary relief and makes the problem worse because nothing will ever be enough. I just feeling so overwhelmed and hopeless and exhausted and want some feedback.
This is my first time posting - I have a fear of throw up and I’ve been told it is cause from my OCD (repetitive thoughts) which makes sense because if someone gets sick it replays over and over again and I can’t get it out of my head. It’s gotten a lot worse in the past maybe two years. I’m always on edge that someone is going to get sick around me. I’ve heard the “best or most common” way to help with this is exposure therapy and OBVIOUSLY I don’t want to do that. Anyone have any tips or anything for this (or maybe have done the exposure therapy)?
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