- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
It sounds like it’s sending you spiralling. I often seek outside reassurance and my partner is right for me, and it seems like you might be doing that with your mother. Except she isn’t giving you that reassurance, she’s feeding into the ocd by questioning your relationship and so you’re sent back into an ocd loop over and over again. I know how difficult it can be to accept that you cannot confirm whether he’s right for you, but it’s what helps. And it’s okay. It’s okay to not know whether he’s right for you. It’s okay to doubt your relationship and it’s okay to have these intrusive thoughts.
- Date posted
- 6y
She doesn’t understand the situation. People who offer advice on things regarding OCD, though they try to help only end up making things worse.
- Date posted
- 6y
Yeah, I noticed that when she said that to me I started to analyze whether my boyfriend did or said anything bad in front of them that could make her believe he is doing something to me or not. I tried to not talk to her about this bc of the same thing you are mentioning, she doesnt really understand. I know she probably believes I dont love him and Im having a hard time accepting it. Another thing is that Ive noticed I usually want like people's approval of my decisions and I know it is SO WRONG but when she says those things I believe she doesnt think we should be together and that affects me
- Date posted
- 6y
when she said what a problem he is becoming she was refering to my boyfriend
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
I talked to my therapist about the emotional disconnection I feel in my relationship — how I often feel nothing when I’m with my boyfriend, how I feel irritated or even disgusted during intimate moments, and how all of this creates constant fear and sadness in me. I told her that I want to love him, that I used to feel more, and that I believe my thoughts and reactions are part of something deeper — like ROCD — not necessarily the truth. But she said something like, “It doesn’t make sense that you want to love him but don’t feel love,” and suggested that I might just be lying to myself and need to “accept the truth.” That crushed me. I kept explaining that these thoughts feel obsessive, that they don’t align with my values or how I see myself — that they’ve taken away my ability to feel joy or peace. And yet, I left with this terrible fear that maybe she’s right, that maybe I’m just in denial. She even told me that I have two choices: accept that I don’t love him and stay while lying to myself, or leave. And that… that made me feel like she was confirming my worst fear — not helping me explore it safely. I don’t want to hurt him. I don’t want to lie to myself. I just want clarity, and peace, and the ability to feel again. I also didn’t tell my boyfriend about the session, because he’s skeptical of therapy — he thinks therapists just want money, and that I have to “help myself” if I want to feel better. I kind of get where he’s coming from, but it still makes me feel a little alone in this. I guess I’m posting here just to say… I feel really lost right now. I don’t know if what I’m experiencing is ROCD or just the truth I’m too scared to accept
- Date posted
- 22w
I don’t know where to begin, this is going to be very long. But whoever responds I appreciate you dearly. I’m 20 years old, I’ve dealt with a lot in my childhood with abandonment and insecurity issues from my family. Aswell of not having a role model of a healthy relationship shown to me as a child. Me and my boyfriend have been together for 3 years, my first healthy relationship. Last year I discovered OCD (I am diagnosed but I ignored my mental health as a teenager like anybody would) I started to get these feelings that I don’t love my partner/he’s not attractive enough/ etc etc. I’ve discovered that it’s ROCD. I made threads on Reddit asking for advice googling for reassurance, all the things as one would do with ocd (as I’m doing now!) One day I woke up and that theme was gone, I felt normal in my relationship for about 4 months with no terrible thoughts. As of about 2-3 months ago, my theme switched. Now I have a fear he doesn’t love me, he’s cheating, he doesn’t want to marry me. It has utterly consumed me (just like my last theme!) I check his phone an unhealthy amount (guess what I never find anything!) He always lets me go through his phone, but as anyone would he gets annoyed and frustrated. I always am searching for signs if he’s acting weird, will get into arguments 24/7 because my brain keeps telling me he’s cheating, I get fake scenarios in my brain, hell I even bought Snapchat+ to stalk his snap score. But ever single time I find nothing. A lot of things trigger me and I over analyze everything, phone calls who his texting. When I do search his phone I check his EMAIL because of how paranoid I am. When I see things on social media about people cheating I SPIRALLLL But what really triggered me was this scenario, his family loves to joke around with me and mess with him at the same time, especially with our relationship, saying I have a leash on him etc etc making jokes (which I can take but when I’m in an ocd spiral and they have no idea something’s are triggering) anyways, we were out to lunch and his mother texts him “are u at some girls house” he told me straight away then responded “why would u say that” then she proceeded to say she’s messing around with him. And sent a picture of me and said I’m with Hailey at lunch, then they had a normal conversation after. Obviously this sent me into a spiral, it still bothers me. I was so upset and anxious, when we got back to his house I went through that man’s phone like it was my only job in the world. And I search EVERYTHING not one thing goes untouched. (I sound insane) anyways we went back to his place, then he called his mom to come in his room and asked why she said that, she felt guilty and said she was messing around she had her hands in her head (mind you she’s been drinking probably just messing around with him when she texted that) she told me not to worry ever about that kind of stuff because her son is not that type of man, she proceeded to leave the room then texted me about how sorry she was and didn’t mean to freak me out and felt like shit about it. Ever since then she’s been acting kind of weird towards me (not really) maybe she’s uncomfortable or there’s another women idk LOL. Anyways yea what the hell do I do I literally can’t function properly.
- Date posted
- 16w
for a few days now I’ve been super anxious about my relationship. I’ve been anxious about it before but lately it’s been worse than normal. I’m in a very healthy and loving relationship, I love my boyfriend so much and he treats me so so well. The only thing is that I’ve been having scary thoughts that what if I’m lying to him and don’t actually love him? What if I don’t find him attractive? And like what if the only way to stop being anxious is to break up with him? I don’t want to leave him and I am so scared. I feel like I’m lying to him by not telling him what’s going on because he might think I’m actually going to leave him, which I’m really not going to. I have had anxiety since before we started dating and incestual and sexual ocd, then I got into a point where I started having religious ocd, and now I have ROCD on top of that I think. I’ve never been diagnosed but I’m going to therapy and figuring things out but I’m so scared. Idk what to do and I feel like if I talk to anyone they’re going to say I have to leave him.
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