Worries of Unpardonable Sin

I am a firm believer, a child of God, and deep down inside I know that God has me and loves me. With OCD though, I keep circling back to worries of the unpardonable sin; I analyze it again to try to find the answer, and there is no universally accepted answer so it’s impossible just to find one answer. In recent years I hadn’t doubted my salvation, but then during an OCD therapy session last year, I said something I did not mean (as a therapeutic exercise), and then I found out about the unpardonable sin a couple weeks later (interestingly I had read those bible verses before, and it never registered with me that Jesus was speaking of an unpardonable sin). I initially worried that what I had said may had been the unpardonable sin but now, looking back, I understand that it was not. I have since read many articles and listened to numerous sermons on what the unpardonable sin is. The fear was overwhelming, and I found myself having terrible (unwanted) thoughts in my head (that I will not type out); I did not believe any of these thoughts, and the more I tried not to think them, the more they kept coming back. I then had fears that I committed the unpardonable sin in my head, but knew that was nonsense. I remember praying in late November last year, telling God that I knew I had not committed this sin (it was not the first time I had prayed this, but I had peace after that prayer this time). The next day, I was hanging around my fiancé’s apartment while she was out, and I heard myself saying, “The Holy Spirit”, out loud. I then went into panic mode, because I was unsure as to why I had said “The Holy Spirit” out loud and was worried as to what I might have said prior to that; essentially, I was worried that I might have caught myself saying one of my terrible thoughts out loud. It scared the daylights out of me, but quite quickly I concluded I must had been thinking and speaking “Praise The Father, Son, and The Holy Spirit”, because I’d remembered thinking and (I believe) saying that out loud earlier that morning. The worry essentially comes back every now and again of “what if” I actually did say one of my terrible thoughts out loud. I love God, the faith He has given me is all that matters to me. I sometimes worry though that I have messed everything up. Does this all make sense? Any input here?

Religion & Spirituality OCD

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 1y ago

Hello, I am also a follower of CHRIST JESUS....If you have TRUELY accepted JESUS CHRIST as your LORD n SAVIOUR it is impossible to commit the unpordonable sin...The unpordonable sin can only be committed by an unbeliever with a REPROBATE MIND, a mind that has REJECTED GOD and a HEART that has no intention of repentance....the unpordonable sin is the SIN OF UNBELIEF.....The PHARISEES committed it during JESUS'S MINISTRY when HE would HEAL THE SICK or CAST OUT DEMONS, they would say HE did those good works by the spirit of Satan when in actually it was HOLY SPIRIT, and JESUS WARNED THEM that calling the HOLY SPIRIT the spirit of Satan was the unpordonable sin because THEY DID NOT BELIEVE THAT GOD DID THOSE GOOD WORKS, those PHARISEES HEARTS were TOTALLY AGAINST GOD and THEY HATED JESUS and had no intentions of repentance and knowing TRUTH....The fact that you are soo sorry about the possibility of sinning against GOD proves YOU LOVE GOD and that your HEART IS RIGHT TOWARDS GOD....Just REST YOUR WEARY SOUL and TRUST GOD...HE LOVES YOU VERY MUCH...JEREMIAH 29vs11 say GOD knows HIS plans towards you, PLANS OF GOOD, NOT EVIL, to give you a GREAT LIFE.....Read PHILIPPIANS 4vs6-8 for ANXIETY.........and KNOW that GOD has NOT GIVEN YOU a spirit of fear but of POWER, LOVE and a SOUND MIND!!!

Username: MollyGrace MollyGrace

Date posted: 1y ago

I struggle the same way is accepted Jesus as my savior but my ocd questions that and it’s scary

Username: A person A person

Date posted: 1y ago

Thanks brother (or sister). Do you have scrupulosity as well?

Username: A person A person

Date posted: 1y ago

I feel so alone in this struggle sometimes, and honestly being able to talk to other OCD sufferers helps me

Username: A person A person

Date posted: 1y ago

I understand the struggle Molly. What helps me is making sure I am always bearing fruit, and not so others know I am a Christian, but because it glorifies God. Think of ways you can spread the word of God, and do those things. 🙂

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 1y ago

I have scrupulosity as well and this story vibes with my experience. I'm sorry that you are going through this. It's challenging to face these fears and doubts. You went to therapy, said something as part of an exercise, but OCD wants to make you doubt your intentions. You did your research, but OCD wants more. You know the thoughts are unwanted, but OCD will not allow you to write the words down, even though you don't believe them. It sounds like you are getting beat down by the obsessions, and struggling with some mental compulsions (mental replaying, thought cancellation, avoidance). I would like to invite you to challenge these compulsions; in the long run, they make OCD worse, which is why you are going into panic mode. It's difficult (I know, I had panic attacks initially) but exposure and response prevention will help. If you don't have a therapist to work with, challenge yourself to see if you can do an exposure and prevent a compulsion. Maybe try writing those words out. Maybe try writing them out so many times that they no longer seem to mean anything. Or record the words so that you can listen to them over and over until they don't mean anything. You are not trying to lose faith, you are trying to learn that these thoughts don't deserve the attention that OCD wants you to give them. Hang in there, OCD is tough but you and God are tougher!

Username: KelSul73

Date posted: 1y ago

Scrupulosity & real event/false memory OCD:

Hey- so I’ve had a rather rocky relationship with God and I’ve always been back and forth but in the darkest times of my life, I have tried to turn to God for consolation. But long before I discovered NOCD, I had a very disturbing cycle of OCD situations for months on end of waking up in the middle of night and calling my pastor/ youth counselor trying to clarify if I had committed the unforgivable sin. Because I have had such an up-and-down relationship with God and going astray so often and all of that- I worried that because it felt like I was being struck by a demon trying to urge me to say (I didn’t say out loud but like a low, inaudible mumble in my mouth) “saying” that God was the opposite of what He is… ever since then I’ve struggled with that moment so much and in that moment, it didn’t feel like I 100% cared about doing it. Because I had been constantly plagued with these obsessive thoughts for so long and didn’t understand what they were, I gave in cause I was exhausted from battling it for so long but it didn’t come out like how it’s described in the Bible…. Idk. I just hate myself thinking about it because I have always been one to skid along boundaries so I feel like it was mocking God because I was angry and it just fills me with fear, upset and panic… I remember feeling so terrified and the physical sensation like my chest was burning and I just felt like I was empty… has anyone else ever gone so far in their OCD that they wondered if they could ever come back?

Username: Cammy123

Date posted: 31w ago

Intrusive thought

I had such a horrible thought! Sometimes I can’t tell if they’re on purpose or accidental but my mind said a thought about “I reject God” then it said “with your heart”. I immediately started freaking out! I still feel the anxiety and fear. I’m trying so hard not to cry my eyes out. I did cry a bit but I’ve prayed for God & Jesus to please forgive me! I can’t live without them! I love Him so fricking much! To have a thought like that hurts so much! It bothers me! Makes me feel so much guilt and shame! I would NEVER say that or even want to think that but my mind is questioning did I think that on purpose or was it my OCD? Sometimes the blasphemous thoughts “feel” on purpose. Please any advice?! Does God still love me?! Will He forgive me for this thought?

Username: Cammy123

Date posted: 27w ago

Religious OCD - being scared

The past few days have been a lot better. But recently I’ve been struggling again with dark wicked unwanted blasphemous thoughts. Such as demonic thoughts, devil thoughts, Satan heart thoughts, worship thoughts & s soul thoughts. These thoughts scare me so much. Especially since I have been having False Memory and it makes me think I’ve accidentally said those nasty thoughts out loud. Sometimes the thoughts are demands of blank enter my heart which is so scary! Or it replaces there names. I just hate when my mind says I “want them” I don’t. I love Jesus & God so much and I feel like I’m disappointed them or made them mad. I don’t ever want them to leave me. Does God & Jesus love me even with these awful thoughts? Sometimes I just get so much guilt & shame. Last night the really hit me hard after being ok for the last 3 days. I just don’t ever want God & Jesus to reject me or look at me with disgust. I know He loves us so much but it’s difficult to see whenever these disgusting thoughts come. I just feel so “far” or how could He want someone like me. I try to remind myself a lot of us Christians struggle with blasphemous thoughts. Religious OCD is pretty common for having devil/demonic thoughts but it just makes you feel so evil. Any advice? Does God & Jesus still love me even with these thoughts, feelings, urges? I pray and sometimes I just feel shame. I love them. Am I okay?

Religion & Spirituality OCD

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