Guilt from OCD

@bonitabella I totally understand this!!! I struggle with that as well. I always ask my husband questions and it can be a question I asked him a million times!! And he gives me the same answer every time. Sometimes he gets upset about it, because he feels like no matter how much he tells me I don’t believe him. just explain to your boyfriend that to you it feels very real. And it’s not that you want to feel or be this way, but you just have a hard time believing. I feel like I cause problems between my husband and I as well. But use this to just communicate with each other better. Be open to why you feel these ways. And explain what happens when you start thinking this way. That it’s not he’s not doing enough, but that you just struggle with these things because of your internal struggles.

@Jesus loves you I did tell him, I told him I think I have ocd cause these thoughts just happen. And his response is “get some help”..lol he’s kinda resentful towards me. But thank you for the advice.

@bonitabella Maybe he doesn’t know how to handle it. Guys can sometimes go into “fix it” mode and once they feel like they can’t fix it they probably feel like it’s out of their hands. I feel like my husband doesn’t always know what to tell me. Have you tried communicating to him what you want/need from him? also I’ve very sorry you are going through a hard time. I know how terrible that can feel. It’s not your fault you feel this way. And I also know it’s not the easiest to just reach out for help. OCD is very complex.

@Jesus loves you Yeah, he’s given me reassurance from the moon and back. 😂 So I’m sure he’s to the point where he’s thinking it’s out of his hands. It kinda feels cold to hear that but he’s already done the most, it’s just up too me. But yeah I think I might have ocd, I kinda don’t want to go to a psychiatrist and have it diagnosed and I also don’t want to tell my mom at all cause of personal reasons, I just don’t want her to feel bad. So yeah I’m doing the best I can, I’m pretty optimistic as of now. But I’ve had hit my lowest just a couple of days ago last week, that’s how I figured I might have this problem.

@bonitabella I’m sure that’s what it is, but that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t love and care about you at all. I understand though completely. And if you don’t feel comfortable reaching out to a psychiatrist as of now, maybe go on your own search. There is many ways to seek help and work towards doing better. Some days are going to be worse than others. But just keep taking steps forward. And be easy on yourself when you have those bad days. But I’ve learned mental health is like this.. if you have a broken leg… you go to get it fixed.. because if you don’t it’s going to get worse. It got worse for me, very much so. That is when I sought out a relationship with God. That is what has helped me. You can read books, watch YouTube videos. Self care. Any step forward is better than being stagnant or taking a step back.

@bonitabella I meant to say my point is mental health is the same way, if you don’t get help for it. It gets worse. It’s like walking on a broken leg

@Jesus loves you Thank you for the advice. 💖💕 Do you go to church? Can you briefly tell me how God helped you, if you’re comfortable with it. I considered myself a Christian but I don’t read the Bible daily or go to church like I used to when I was younger.

@bonitabella Well, let me try to sum it up quickly 😂I actually came from a broken household. I did not grow up knowing God. Jesus found me at my lowest. I actually was wanting to take my life at 16. I had dream where I was actually on one of those autopsy tables and I saw a figure of a man when light coming from Him. I knew it was Jesus. Even though I never even grew up as a Christian. He told me “it’s not your time” I woke up and didn’t want to take my life anymore, I actually felt a peace I can’t explain. Still then, I didn’t accept Christ yet. As time went on, life got more difficult. I prayed to God to send me someone who understands me and loves me for me. Exactly a month later I met my now husband. And we both found Jesus together. We both came from broken childhoods, didn’t know Jesus at all. The Bible is His word to us. He gives us hope and a purpose. He loves us and just wants a relationship with us. I’ve experienced Jesus in my life, in ways that I cannot not believe. He is real and He loves you and wants to help you. I’m honestly in a tough spot in my life, but there’s a difference now then there was without me knowing God. I have a hope now. He’s the best healer. Maybe start by searching up sermons and looking up the gospel. Praying for Him to help you. I’m here to answer any other questions you have!! And I’ll be praying for you!

@bonitabella Sorry it’s a lot lol! Also I do go to church, but I have not lately. I’ve had many ups and downs. But God has changed so much in me already!