Anyone from Romania?

PLEASE do not argue over political stances in this post that is not what this is for at all. For context I consider myself someone with mixed views (politically homeless) and I am connected with people of all stripes and beliefs and stances. After the inauguration in the USA this weekend there has been an overwhelming response from the populace especially online. I feel like I’m completely surrounded by people (on every “side”) who are making very intense and unyielding statements about other people’s morals and values and “good-“ or “bad-ness” based on their beliefs, opinions, responses or non responses to all the different things going on politically. I feel like it’s driving me insane. My head has been spinning constantly and I can’t stop crying. I feel like I’m drowning and cornered and under a police interrogation light. I’m so terrified of saying or doing or thinking or not thinking the “wrong” thing, I’m feeling my heart being torn in so many directions and I’m struggling to stop ruminating and spiraling over feeling like I don’t belong anywhere and no matter what I’m always going to be evil to someone. This is not me taking a side or revealing what I think, or trying to make an implied judgment or comment on ANY political figure, policy, etc….My point is: the issue I’m having is with the way people are talking about these issues and about other people in the midst of these issues, so black and white, so moralistic, and my OCD is having a field day. Just looking for camaraderie and to know I’m not alone in this. I please ask again do not bring up specific political issues or take stances in the comments. Thank you.

I read a lot of other people’s posts where they deal with intrusive feelings, and sometimes even emotions? Would anyone care to further explain so i can understand this better? it would be very much appreciated.

Hey everyone, First time posting here! Wanted to share my story for some support but also to hopefully make others feel less alone. In short - my ROCD has made such a mess of my personal life. I was in a great relationship until spring of last year, at which point we separated mainly due to my ROCD. I struggled heavily with OCD about 10 years ago (harm based intrusive thoughts, sexual orientation ocd, etc). It took a lot of work but I was able to mostly overcome my struggles and truthfully, hadn’t given ocd much thought since then. I thought I was cured. And then 10 years later I am in a very fulfilling relationship with a girl I really love, but at about the year mark in my relationship things really changed. She wanted to have a conversation about next steps (moving in, marriage, kids, etc) and at that point my brain just went into panic mode and the ocd took over. From that point on, I was constantly scanning for red flags, felt very reserved when it came to any sort of statement or commitment and tended to avoid anything that would indicate I was committed to a long term future. It was not that I didn’t love it was just that my ocd was doing anything to keep me from making a big commitment. It eventually got a point where we had a big conversation about breaking up or staying together and my OCD convinced me that it was safer and that I would do less harm to her if we ended things, which was incredibly devastating to me. At the time I felt like my obsessing over small red flags were normal and that I needed to protect myself. I just had no clue it was ROCD. I spent the next 8 months missing her and kicking myself for my mistakes, and I eventually got the courage to reach out and see if she’d be willing to talk again, which she was. But the problem is, at this point I still didn’t know it was ocd. So when we talked again I was still plagued by ROCD as all the same thoughts and feelings came flooding back. We tried to talk through things but once again I was unable to make any sort of commitment to the future so it went nowhere. Once again, I am feeling very sad and angry at myself for not being able to handle ROCD. I feel like I let it control me twice and has robbed me of a lot of happiness and hurt someone I care very much about. I understand it’s probably not best to just look at ourselves with anger and guilt all the time but it’s hard not to when you feel like you just caused so much harm. Anyone feel like they can relate? Or if anyone is going through something similar I am happy to chat as ROCD can really be tricky. Thanks