Quick question: When I first was dealing with my ocd I would not talk to this one girl because my hocd tried to say I liked her. I thought if I ignored her it would all stop and I wouldn’t think about the thoughts anymore. Is that a compulsion?

I don't think so. But maybe you should meet her, and let the thoughts come, don't analyse and do not panic. Whenever I get these thoughts, I take a deep breath and say: Okay whatever, I'm going to focus myself on something that's actually benefits me. It will be very hard, but it gets better. I have a relapse atm, but I'm trying really hard to do the exact same as I did before. Goodluck and let me know if it works for you✌️?

Well I was friends with her, and she was bisexual so I was afraid I was going to like her so I avoided her. It’s sad because I never thought like that about her she was just my friend :(

That's OCD fucking with your head. I also have these moments, but I think it's all fake. You say you don't want it, so there's nothing to worry about. OCD can feel very very real, but I don't think it has the power to make you actually like someone. It will say you do, but deep down you know it's bs

Yeah I know it’s not true, the way I’ve been feeling lately is not me. I’ve never felt like I liked girls, I’ve always liked guys. It’s sad because ocd likes to question my whole life, it’s just not me! I know I can get better it’s just going to take awhile.

Yes I know. I'm rooting for that you are going to feel better??

I hope you feel better too!!❤️

Thank you?

That’s not a compulsion but it is avoidance, which most people with OCD struggle with. Try not to avoid her. In fact, getting closer to her would be a great challenge to your OCD.

Do your best to treat her like you would any other teammate. You said it yourself: she’s not the cause of your thoughts. She may be a trigger, but the cause is your OCD, so don’t take your frustration out on her. She’s just an innocent person living her life. It’s okay to be scared you might act on your thoughts, but avoiding the situation only convinces your brain even more that that fear is true. It’s not. And you have to show your brain that by not avoiding her even when it scares you.

Yeah that’s what I actually tried to do at one point, I just talked to her I was on edge the whole time but I did it. It didn’t help but that’s probably because I didn’t do it more than once

Yeah you gotta do it again and again!

I’ll make sure to do it when volleyball starts!

Please do not use this as reassurance, bc I don't mean it that way. Reassurance is going to make everything worse

Yeah I’m not playing volleyball at the moment but when I do I’ll be closer to her. I’m just scared I’m going to act on my ocd thoughts. Idk why I don’t want to do that, it’s very confusing. During volleyball I used to literally not talk to her, I would try not to look at her, I avoided her 24/7. Also at one point she started to piss me off. I didn’t want to be around her because I thought she was causing my thoughts. I just wanted them to stop and I thought that would help me, but it didn’t. It also messed with volleyball, I didn’t want to play anymore. I hated it. I’ve always loved volleyball and I’m not trying to be cocky but I’m very good and coaches are looking at me, and ocd was really affecting it :(

College coaches*