Date posted: 2y

ERP/ACT question

Hi. I’ve been very compulsive on this app of late and not using it in a healthy way. Question - a real issue I am struggling with is committing to ERP. - my mind doubts wether it’s OCD, so therefore sees ERP as useless. - my mind tells me that exposing myself will lead to discovery that my fear is true. - I’m finding it incredibly difficult to see my theme as irrelevant and not ‘real’ How have people tackled the above? Any examples would be great. E.g. was it just trusting your therapist knows and you just have to trust them? Was it just giving it a go for long enough? Would love some advice/lived advice etc. Cheers

C181913530

Date posted: 2y

I doubt everyday whether its OCD. Would love to hear some advice too.

[Deleted]

Date posted: 2y

Comment deleted by user

Date posted: 2y

@HenryMP27 Thanks Henry. Bit more context. My theme is SOOCD. I identified as a straight male, with no seemingly other thoughts otherwise until the thought popped in - “you are gay”. Although it’s a bit more complicated with some ROCD stuff too, I’m now 35 and have been really struggling for a year. One of (many) roadblocks I’ve had to engage with erp has been this inner feeling or belief that I am gay. This despite never seemingly wanting, or ever wanting this, nor any romantic attraction or even thoughts about it. So take this ‘belief’ or maybe it’s an intrusive thought that it’s a belief, I’m scared that doing exposure will prove my fear.

Date posted: 2y

@gp Honestly, when it comes down to it. I seem to believe the intrusive thoughts and feelings as real and true. It appears to be a major barrier to me engaging in therapy correctly. It seems it would be far easier if I ‘knew’ this was ocd.

Date posted: 2y

@HenryMP27 It’s horrifyingly scary. I’m married with a son on the way.

Date posted: 2y

@HenryMP27 Sorry - I can’t really describe exactly why I’m so afraid of it. My brain just will not stop thinking about it. Won’t stop trying to find evidence that it’s true. Won’t stop trying to engage with the content and thoughts. And it causes me so much fear and anxiety.

[Deleted]

Date posted: 2y

Comment deleted by user

Date posted: 2y

@HenryMP27 Thank you for experience. From what I understand about treatment, it wasn’t the act of exposure that helped you, it was what you were doing in your head during and after if. So in terms of the way I logically see ERP, is it’s all about getting to a point where the thoughts and feelings don’t matter. So you get to a point where you are ‘meh’ to them. ERP creates the environment for you to do this and the RP is the practice to allow yourself to be as scared and anxious and unsure as possible. Then over time, the thoughts and feelings become less relevant to you. It makes absolute sense to me why this is helpful. My barrier appears to be insight into my condition. My psych has diagnosed me with ocd (that doesn’t seem enough), my symptoms mostly align with HOCD, that doesn’t seem enough. I’ve never felt a romantic attraction to a man in my life, that doesn’t seem enough. Yet … it’s like I don’t believe this is ocd, I believe the theme, and it’s stopping me from engaging in treatment. I THINK the answer is that EVERYONE believes their theme to begin with. If you didn’t, you likely wouldn’t care. The key is to trust in the diagnosis, trust in the treatment and engage in ERP, over and over again, until your brain re-learns healthy coping patterns rather than obsessive ones. It’s bloody so hard.

Tea and Honey

Date posted: 19w

Summary of recovery through ERP

I had just posted a summary of ERP for a group member, and I thought it might be useful for everybody. Here it is below (with a little extra added)…. ERP therapy is researched-based. Most other therapies don’t work. There have been people who have been literally stuck in their houses (from their OCD) who gained their lives back through ERP therapy. NOCD does ERP therapy exclusively. You can find it in other places too, but you have to ask around. There are two tenants of ERP therapy: The first one has to do with the repetitive thoughts inside our heads. These thoughts are actually defined as “obsessions”. You are not supposed to do anything with the obsessions. You are supposed to let them run through your head freely, without trying to fix them or stop them. Imagine a tree planted by a river. The leaves fall off and float down the river. You can see the leaves falling, but you don’t try to stop them or pick them up. You don’t try to fix them. You just let them float away. This is really important to do with your obsessive thoughts. The more you try to fight them off, the worse they get. I used to have blasphemous sentences running in my head 24/7. I felt like I had to put a “not” next to each sentence in order to “fix” it. But this just took hours of my time every day, and it was very scary, because I was worried that if I messed up, that I would go to hell. It was very freeing to learn later that I could just let those sentences run freely through my head without trying to fix them. The second part of ERP therapy is all about “denying your compulsions.” Every time OCD tells you that if you don’t do things a certain way that something really bad will happen, that is a compulsion. Once you recognize what your compulsions are, ERP therapy will have you practice stopping doing all of those things. For some people, that will mean stopping washing their hands or touching lights switches or, in my case, putting “fixing” words in their head. Compulsions are safety behaviors. During ERP therapy, you will practice stopping engaging with safety behaviors. All this is very hard to do and scary, so during therapy you will be given tools to help you deal with the fear. Often ERP therapy will take people from being non-functional to functional. I highly recommend it. ————————————————- PITFALL #1: After you have been doing ERP for a while and become somewhat successful, the OCD will try subtle little tricks to bring you down again. The first one is to tell you that your thoughts are REAL and not OCD, and therefore you can’t apply ERP therapy. Don’t fall for this trick! All thoughts are just thoughts. They are all meaningless. Don’t try to figure out what is real and what is OCD. Just treat all thoughts with ERP therapy. PITFALL #2: The second pitfall is that OCD will tell you that you can’t move forward unless you have absolute certainty that you will be safe. Hate to tell you this, folks, but there is no certainty in life. You will never know for SURE that you or your loved ones will be “safe” from the OCD rules. Therefore, you have to move forward in the uncertainty. It’s hard, but it gets easier with time and practice. We got this, guys !!!!!!

Monkeybrain842

Date posted: 18w

How does one activl 'practice' exposure therapy ?

One problem - Various themes This is my first post. I had a relapse a few months ago. Life was amazing and then boom, I got triggered by something and started spiralling about my sexuality (having finally been at peace for two years, entered a healthy new relationship and come out of the closet as an older women). How do you, when you're not triggered practice ERP? I'm able to try and accept the thoughts every time I see a man. What should I be doing when I don't encounter these triggers. I was to say as well that I also am starting to get real event OCD about some of the sexual things I did in the past when I was married and in an unhealthy toxic relationship with my ex husband. I am shamed and disgusted and I'm working on it but there's a certain subsection of the LGBTQ community that trigger these thoughts, groinals and thing for me... I feel like I'm beginning to realise I need to maybe be a little more active in my recovery instead of waiting for triggers... But I don't know how

TrustGod24

Date posted: 18w

ERP

I’m thinking about doing erp but my ocd is so severe the thought of accepting my fears happening to me makes me sick to my stomach. I also believe in the power of my words and saying I accept this Bad thing will attract it into my life. I’m not sure what I should do🥲

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