bad thoughts

this may seem really gross. but i was at work today and i was feeling things sexually and i often worry that it's because of other people because i will think about people and then get these feelings but i tell myself to stop in my head because i don't want to think them or feel that way about anyone else because i'm with someone that i love dearly. and i feel horrible about it because sometimes it happens with people younger than me. i feel disgusted with myself.

spookycupcake

Date posted: 2y

I get this and I notice sometimes it’s just as a result of anxiety not even sexual stuff, it feels like the body tricks me into feeling that way just because it’s exactly what I don’t want to happen

c.dence0.0

Date posted: 2y

@spookycupcake yeah that does make sense, thank you.

VGH

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

I understand, I truly do. One of the most difficult things for me to wrap my head around was the fact that the very things I was doing to make myself feel better, were the very things that kept the OCD thoughts going strong. When you say you "can't stop thinking about it" that is rumination which is a compulsion and that keeps the thoughts coming. You can't stop the thoughts, but instead of trying to figure it out or hoping it stops, maybe try labeling it as an OCD thought, and every time in pops in your mind you label it again. When I first started I actually counted and I would have over 100 times a day where I would label a thought "Oh there's my OCD again". Confession is also a compulsion that keeps the OCD thoughts going strong. I understand, it feels horrible and you want to get rid of that feeling. It speaks to the kind of person you truly are that these thoughts are some bothersome to you. Have you reached out to NOCD for therapy? I highly recommend it. What you are going through is truly very common, and you don't have to suffer through this.

c.dence0.0

Date posted: 2y

@VGH i really really appreciate you talking to me about this by the way. but that does sound right, often i make myself believe that i actually want to think these things and it sucks. but i haven't tried the therapy because idk if it costs money and im kinda nervous i guess to talk to people on a call and won't take the step to do it. i've been wanting to go back to therapy but i can't spend money on it right now.

VGH

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

I'm glad you reached out :) Here is a video you may find helpful https://www.youtube.com/live/ErCZG86nWQg?feature=share. Chrissy Hodges has same great info on YouTube about these types of intrusive thoughts. Just remember you are not alone, and when you are ready, there is help out there. A really great book is "Needing to Know for Sure" by Seif and Winston. Wishing you all the best!

c.dence0.0

Date posted: 2y

@VGH thank you!

VGH

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

Hey there, allowing the thoughts while focusing on things that you value may help. Don't try to figure it out, stop the thoughts, berate yourself, etc. You don't have to "do" anything. I know it's hard, but allowing, rather than resisting thoughts is what will decrease their frequency. Dr. Michael Greenberg has a great article on rumination. When we "worry" or ruminate we are directing our attention toward something which keeps it in our minds. What if you just let the thoughts be there without focusing on them. When I did this, my thoughts cleared on their own.

c.dence0.0

Date posted: 2y

@VGH i've tried this but it's very hard to do when my thoughts have been so loud for so so many years now. it's as if no matter what i do i can't stop them. especially when something like that happens. i feel disgusted with myself and i can't stop thinking about it until i confess because i feel it is the right thing. and i know it is my ocd but still. i didn't mention this before but having sexual thoughts about people that are younger than me who are intoxicated and getting those feelings is horrible.

issphra 🫶🏻

Date posted: 23w

Does anyone ever feel like they like a thought?

I have been struggling today, most likely due to lack of sleep. I had a thought that I would consider intrusive, but what really unsettled me was that I felt like I liked it, **not just in the sense that I lacked anxiety over it, but that I genuinely felt like I wanted it.** It left me feeling really confused. It happened during intimacy, which makes it even more unsettling. The thought was incestuous, I found myself imagining and comparing the moment with my boyfriend to my father :/, and what really alarms me is that I felt like I wanted it there, both mentally and physically. I was having a really nice time, so maybe the physical sensations got mixed in somehow, but it still worries me. I did my best not to ruminate in the moment and avoided checking. I tried to move on, but the feeling of genuinely liking the thought was so clear that it is hard to shake off. Has anyone else experienced something similar? This is one of the first times it has ever happened to this extent.

G06

Date posted: 22w

Lust while in relationship

Does anyone struggle with the OCD thought of lust while in a relationship? I get all these intense feelings and feelings that I want to have these thoughts with other people besides my boyfriend in my head yknow? And I’m afraid that these feelings are true and that i want to think these things but I don’t. I’ve been having a hard time this evening with this because the feelings and sensations I have on my body are really strong. And I feel like I sinned against him.

Anonymousssssss

Date posted: 21w

Help

I deal pretty heavily with this. The last couple days, I’ve had what I think are urges. Something pops into my head intrusively and then what stems from that is me WANTING to just indulge in it even though it’s gross. I get worried bc I used to struggle w thoughts about my dad for a long time until eventually I just purposely thought of him while self pleasuring and got off to it. While that’s something I did, it is NOT me. It all stemmed from my mental health declining a couple years back, I was never this way before. So I get worried that it almost happened or might happen with my pocd cuz I could never live with myself if it did.

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