Harm OCD tips

I need help. So harm OCD is a relatively new theme for me. It’s only been happening the last few days, but it sucks. I’m taking Prozac for anxiety and I’m about 3 1/2 weeks in, so these intrusive thoughts don’t cause a lot of anxiety as much as they do just general discomfort. I can feel the anxiety start to take hold a little, but it’s mostly just discomfort and disgust in my head that I’m having these thoughts which makes it worse because there’s no anxiety so I think “do I like these thoughts?” or “do I actually want to do this?” Like today I’m making carne asada tacos and suddenly the thought pops into my head “this is human meat” and I had to check the label on the meat to make sure. Then I have a knife cutting it and my dad says something and I thought “what if that annoys me” and then the thought of stabbing him came into my head which sucked. I think this has to do with the fact that I saw a preview for the Dahmer series on Netflix and got anxiety at the urge to watch it. I’ve never been a violent person and that makes these thoughts worse. I feel like I’m a psychopath or some repressed killer who is losing their mind. Please help

CopingwithOCD

Date posted: 2y

Hi! I actually went through the theme of Harm OCD and overcame the intrusive thoughts so maybe I can help a little. I’m not sure if you have been going through ERP, but it helped me tremendously. Personally, exposure is good. These thoughts are not you; they’re called intrusive thoughts for that reason. You don’t want them there in the first place. The goal is allowing the anxiety to overwhelm you and sitting with the thoughts. Continue what you are doing, because if you noticed, nothing happened while you were cutting or making your food. That’s what’s going to continue to happen; absolutely nothing. Intrusive thoughts have made me believe I needed to go into a psych ward, spent weeks not being around family, and even had to lock my dog out of my own room in fears I was going to kill her or “wanted” to. I went through exposures and every thought slowly got less debilitating. I am struggling with POCD at the moment but because I have been through ERP I can manage it a little more. You will be okay.

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

@CopingwithOCD Thank you so much for this reply! I am also going through POCD as one of my themes, which sucks too. I really appreciate your words of wisdom, and I wish you the best in beating OCD!

kaio16

Date posted: 2y

i was going to comment something similar but you everything you said was perfectly based, good work!

D:)

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

@CopingwithOCD thank you so much for sharing this, it’s very helpful🩷

Beth4321

Date posted: 2y

Thank you so much for being vulnerable enough to share the intrusive thoughts you're struggling with...I've been struggling with the exact same things, like what if that annoys me and horrific intrusive thoughts pile on....making me feel like I'm watching myself become a psychopath. You're not alone....ERP has been helping, my reactions to all of these things are less severe, but still just as scary, do over time I keep believing it'll all become less and less debilitating, disgusting, shame inducing etc.

lu22

Date posted: 23w

I really need advice harm ocd

I know we’re not meant to ask for reassurance but I’m currently not in therapy and I need help, it feels scarily real and I feel like I’m not anxious or worried over the thoughts. I had stabbing thoughts about someone I care about and I started deliberately imagining them to test myself to see if I hate it or not but instead it felt like I knew how it feels to stab someone and like the feeling of doing that physical action and I swear it is the worst thing I have ever experienced as well I had moments where it felt like It was about to happen or I keep getting this really sick ‘happy’ feeling that I want to do that and I don’t know what that is but it feels incredibly real almost like I was getting a happy feeling or wanted to do that thing and jsut wasn’t giving into it and now I’m thinking I’m actually evil and it feels like I get a pleasurable feeling over the thought of doing that and would want to do it?? Because I ‘like’ the feeling of doing it or it would ‘feel’ good I swear I really don’t know what to do it feels incredibly real I feel like I can’t even say that I’m worried or scared because I feel like I’m lying and actually want it and have evil desires I’m really concerned, I have never done anything bad in my life, I feel like what if through experimenting and imagining the thoughts to test myself I have suddenly discovered I like it because it feels extremely real that I would ‘enjoy’ or like Doing that evil thing and it’s really concerning, i don’t understand I was fine a few days ago and suddenly I’m experiencing this? Is it possible to suddenly become evil i don’t want to be evil, but what if i like it and my desire to not be evil isn’t as strong as this ‘happy feeling’ i wish I can be normal I don’t want any of this please but I swear I feel like there is something wrong with me, I think this is the worst I’ve ever felt, like it feels like I want it and would enjoy it and it’s making me feel really worried but at the same time I don’t even know if I’m worried please help I need advice

Thejollygian...

Date posted: 22w

My Harm OCD

Basically long story short, ive been dealing with anxiety for a very long time all my life I'm 23 now but about 5 months ago my anxiety started to get really and I overthink a ton and get worried to easily. So my chest hurt for a while from stress at work made me worry why it was hurting, then me worrying and thinking worse case scenarios was making it worse. So i and to go to the doctor and got diagnosed properly with anxiety and I have a med now that I take when I really need it called hydroxyzine but I also have another med that is Zoloft that I have been taking for a about a month now, to help with my intrusive thoughts I have sometimes i only get them when im stressed or when I'm by myself or when i just overthink in general, my loneliness depression is one of the reasons for my anxiety because I wish I had someone as in partner wise to love me and for me to love them. But anyways I've had intrusive thoughts about possibly hurting myself and family, or even my dog. Ive never acted on any of my thoughts in the past and I don't want to but I have had anxiety attacks when everything feels to real and really scares me. I constantly have the thought of am I crazy or am I becoming crazy and stuff and I've done a lot of looking stuff in the past about symptoms but most of them are identical to what anxiety is so it's hard to tell the difference. It's been probably 2 weeks since we last talked. I've been mostly doing good. But I just was wondering if had a little Harm OCD intrusive thought happen yesterday that targeted my Aunt at work she was complaining all day and when it got closer to the end of the shifts for us. I was already annoyed with a situation that happened earlier in the work day. But she came into my department and then went back over to hers and I said it out loud to myself and said you better get back over there or I'll, I tried to say something else because the word I was going to say was kill you. Obviously I don't but that's what my intrusive thought wanted me to say. And made me think thats why i got to hurt her to stop her complaing So the rest of the night I was saying she is safe I am safe I'm control, like this is just anxiety lying to you, it's just because I'm tired and got annoyed earlier. I can't tell if it was working or not because I was so tired and just wanted to go home. But after work her and I spent time together at our house she was on the one couch and I was on the other with a bunch of our dogs in the living room. I tried to keep my mind off of what happened, and I was fighting some stomach achyness already. But I obviously don't want to hurt her and we had conversations just fine. But I went to my other aunt house at night after work to go to bed because she has to watch my aunts dogs because my other aunt and family is on vacation. But anyways I'm trying to get over that word Kill, that word is what is scarring me and sticking. Like my anxiety is lying saying kill, or basically do harm. I don't want to do anything bad but I'm trying to shake that feeling and stickiness of that word. I'm just so scared and worried.

joshuadrennen

Date posted: 20w

struggling with harm OCD

i’m back in a cycle of having harm related OCD thoughts and feelings and urges and i get these episodes where it’s like i’m disassociating and feel like i’m about to snap and go crazy violent. does anyone else experience this? i need help

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