Addicted to validation

I love astrology and tarot readings and watching YouTube videos but I realized this kind of perpetuates my ruminating thoughts but I feel like I’m addicted to the doses of validation it does give me. It also helps me deal with relationship stress but gives me a reason to hold on to toxic relationships at the same time. Does anyone else experience this ? Mainly if you understand these concepts and how they can be useful tools but because of how we use it to cope it can become a toxic distraction. I miss approaching life embracing the mystery but I find it difficult to stop entertaining this content. Honestly though when I am more social the less I want to hear someone’s perspective on reality because I am instead just living my life and sharing it with others and that mirror explains what is reality. However I have the tendency to isolate when stressed and it becomes a negative cycle. If you have tips on getting out of your comfort zone please share :) <3

mbfaraoni25

Date posted: 2y

i’m glad you shared your perspective! personally i don’t entertain the idea of astrology or tarot cards anymore. i don’t think they are factual/ accurate or can truly predict anything about your personality or your life. but i totally understand how it can be comforting for some people. i actually used to believe in astrology and i would research it a lot but by looking at it in a different perspective i was able to see that it really wasn’t doing much for me. embracing the uncertainty is the best way to go about it. we will never be 100% sure about what will happen in our lives even with tarot cards and astrology. ultimately we all naturally do things that will make us comfortable so just try to take small steps outside of your comfort zone and i promise you will feel better :)

avacado3

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

I definitely get this - my mom has ocd and she loves taro and signs from the universe and all that (which can be helpful and interesting) but I think it’s important to find the line between compulsive consumption and when you’re actually just interested in it. So noticing when you’re motivated to seek those things out because you want certainty is important. I think that in terms of validation - there’s healthier ways of doing that for yourself (people inherently just need validation and support) so noticing when you want validation from someone - thinking “can I trust myself to answer this?” Or, “can I give myself this validation (if it’s not compulsive) self esteem work can be helpful with ocd especially. There’s a workbook on Amazon called Self Compassion for OCD which may help you start to find fulfilling connection with yourself rather than seeking out approval from others. Tips for getting out of your comfort zone: - do the opposite of what ocd says (as best you can) - exposure therapy - in your case I would recommend scripts about hearing someone else’s perspective because it sounds like something you avoid - ERP - noticing tendencies to isolate and why you might do so - gently opening up to safe people and expressing your feelings Anyways, hope this helps!! I deal with some of this too and these tips have helped me. Wishing you all the best in your recovery 🤗🤗

Honeyshark

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

It sounds like reassurance seeking which feeds OCD.

flyana

Date posted: 25w

Realizing my mind doesn’t know how to be content

Man… it’s like, if I get over one obsession, another comes, and when I run out of new obsessions, old ones come back. Do I… not know how to be content? It reminds me of when Ru Paul told Katya, “You’re addicted to the anxiety.” I don’t know how to change this, but I’m glad I’m recognizing it. It’s awful — I can’t let myself be happy without punishing myself for my past mistakes, and honestly, I just have to just let myself be human. Gonna try meditating and reading more. Any other tips greatly appreciated.

SunnyAnon

Date posted: 25w

ocd + interests + online discussions

i’ve been having this theme pop up recently where if I see people either criticize or be a hater and spread misinformation or seeing old controversies about my current interests/hyper-fixations i find myself having a crazy anxiety attack about if it’s “morally okay” to be interested in my interests anymore. i feel really singled out and like im doing something wrong because im watching a youtuber or listening to a specific musical group. in all of these specific situations the people involved have talked about the situations and have changed accordingly but seeing it makes me feel like i shouldn’t be allowed to like my favorite things. to be clear none of these things are dramatically evil or bad. it’s either misinformation/uneducated people influencing someone opinion and then they learn and change. it just makes me feel like im not allowed to like my favorite things anymore because of people criticizing it??? if that makes sense??? also this is a little off topic but also not really because i’m 99.99% sure im autistic because of MANY things but with this specifically i have very strong interests and i feel very deep feelings about them and any and all criticism or hateful comments towards my favorite things trigger me deeply and make my ocd act up and make me feel uncomfortable and uncertain and anxious and it causes physical discomfort to me. i really don’t know how to calm myself down about this specific theme it’s brand new and makes me feel really anxious. not trying to look for reassurance but does anyone else understand what i mean??? does anyone have any advice on how to not give into the negative comments??? any suggestions on how to ease this specific anxiety???

"Pure" OCD

ocdonedidily1

Date posted: 23w

Perfectionism OCD and rumination

There’s this one situation that I haven’t stopped thinking about from last night . So basically, I was reading 'The power of Now' which is a book that I love so much and really got me into spirituality. It’s been so helpful for my OCD and rumination but it’s also been pretty triggering for it as of late, so I’ve taken a long break from consistently reading it. The excerpt I read was about abundance and how its not about being bountiful, necessarily in material things but realizing and being grateful for the things that exist in your life now and in doing so, you will open yourself up to more good things. I understood it but I re-read it a lot because I didn't feel confident enough to explain it to someone else. but otherwise I LOVED IT. It made me feel so at peace, I agreed with it, and it gave me hope to start focusing on the good things in my life rather than the bad. So when I went to bed I rehearsed myself explaining it to someone on a podcast and then all these questions started flooding in like “why should I only focus on the good and aren't we supposed to accept the good and bad? Aren’t those the values of Buddha and spirituality” “Ya, we're supposed to accept the good and the bad but why?- so we can feel more good??? And isn't the point of OCD to not label things as good and bad? and why should I focus on the good- so I can feel good? why should I feel good? because I'm worthy of it? why am I worthy of it? because I'm a good person and do good things? well I’ve also done bad things so why shouldn't I consider that. I just don’t understand why I should feel good without it being selfish. And then this went on for like 2 or 3 hours. Like holy shit. I over explain these ideas and concepts that I resonate with to the point where they don't even make sense to me anymore. It becomes very existensial very quick. And I’m not suicidal but these questions make me feel hopeless in society for some reason?? And myself. Like if everything contradicts everything then what’s the point to life? If nothing can be understood or explained in a senseful way, then how do people move forward and make decisions, like AT ALL? There’s never a right or perfect answer and I feel like with any decision I make in regards, I’m doing a compulsion either way. If I don’t answer them, then I’m avoiding it and if I do then I’m checking and seeking reassurance. I’m sorry if this was way too long and over-explained I just need some advice or to know if anyone can relate in any way. Also, I’m sorry if some of those back-to-back questions were triggering.

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Addicted to validation

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