Existential OCD and DPDR

@mbfaraoni25 Thank you. It is the strangest of feelings but know it’s a natural process to feel. It doesn’t always help when your mind comes up with stupid questions which you know will lead you down a rabbit hole and endless googling!

@benjita1 of course! i hear you, the endless googling gets me every time but honestly it helps me to stop googling and just let the thought be a mystery

@RMO2023 It’s Derealisation and Depersonalisation

@klin18 Thank you for your reply. I’m looking forward to starting ERP and getting back to normality/reality!

@davem2 Thank you for your reply. I am sorry to hear the issues you have also had. I was very hesitant about taking the medication at first mainly because of the listed side effects but after speaking to the doctor we agreed I should give them a try. We will get through this 👍🏻

@benjita1 Also, I have been dealing with it for about 3 weeks also. Knowing we are following the same path brings me comfort!

@davem2 Brings me comfort too!

@benjita1 I just got off of the consultation for my therapy to begin and it’s similar to yours. They indicated a September start date. I found a YouTube channel of a woman who went through what we seem to be going through and she seems to have overcome it and found a vibrancy in her life again. I’d love to share her channel with you if you’re interested. Until my therapy starts I’ve been doing a lot of walking, I’m beginning to meditate. I’ve avoided reaching out to people in my life who have very chaotic lives as I’ve found it difficult to conceptualize my life as highly stressful with my underlying existential themes. I’m also going to start supplementing magnesium and vitamin D in my daily diet as I’ve researched that magnesium has calming effects and vitamin D help our body metabolize it more effectively.

@davem2 That’s great news news about your therapy. Please do share the YouTube channel. I have avoided YouTube up until now as I was worried about being overly consumed with information (TikTok has done a good job at that!). I’m really into cycling myself and hope to get back out on the bike tomorrow! Walking is a great activity to do, do you live in the countryside or city? Thank you for all your help and support. It’s much appreciated and I am really pleased that I made the first step of posting my first story on here!

@benjita1 Robin Schindelka is the YouTube channel. Her videos do have triggers so only indulge when you have the energy to do so. I live in a suburb of a large metropolitan area. It’s my pleasure to try and help. Helping has always been a positive outlet for me. I think the biggest step for me so far has been acknowledging that though my thoughts have been scary and overwhelming that the OCD is what is causing me to chronically think about them. Don’t forget to live life throughout all of this. Rest when necessary but don’t let it pull you down to where it can be the only thing you think about.

@benjita1 How are you feeling today?

@davem2 Feeling a bit better today, thank you. How about you?

@benjita1 Honestly last night I was almost felt like I had some segments of normal life where my mind was a little quieter. We will see how today goes. Starting the day is always the hardest part for me.

@benjita1 How ya holding up?

@davem2 Not too bad thank you, on day 8 of the medication but know it’s going to take a few more days to kick in. Trying to keep myself busy the best I can and enjoy the summer holidays with my family. How are you doing? Has your medication arrived yet?

@benjita1 Yes, my medication has arrived and I was able to start therapy early on Monday of last week and have had two sessions so far. I haven’t started my medication yet as I’m a little apprehensive due to some depression from the existential angst and I have slightly higher blood pressure. I live alone so I worry about any adverse reactions a little more since I may not notice a difference internally. I have however lost 20 pounds since July 25th which is fine because I could afford to lose the weight but 20 pounds within a month is far from healthy. I will say I feel like I have had moments of normalcy since we last spoke. Idk if I’m recovering though or if it’s just due to my body and mind getting to exhausted to really think.

@davem2 Well done on starting the therapy, I hope it is going well for you. I know it’s early days but just starting it is a massive start. Completely agree about starting the medication. Some of the side effects are a little concerning and I completely understand what you mean. Hopefully we will both get back to normality soon!

@davem2 How are you doing mate?

@benjita1 I’d say mostly better? Yourself?

@davem2 I still feel disassociated and what not but I haven’t been having as many panic attacks

@davem2 Yeah, I think the medication has taken the edge off things. Can’t wait to start the therapy and get my life back on track.

@benjita1 Have you had any side affects from the meds?

@davem2 I have only really had tiredness and I kind of grind my teeth a bit but other than that nothing else. I have felt almost normal today - first time in ages. Have you started yours yet?

@benjita1 Not yet, a friend of mine is coming to visit next week and I’m gonna prob start while they are around for 4 days so I have some supervision. Just because it urges you not to drive and concerns with depression and possible increased suicidal thoughts.