- Date posted
- 1y
what if my false memories are real
hey so im currently suffering with what i think is pocd and false memory but i just feel like i haven’t heard of anyone else going through exactly what i have which makes me think is it actually false memories or have i done this awful thing before and my brains just trying to block it out ? i’ve recently had to leave my job because of this i was working in a school but was coming home on a night time and going back on my every footstep each day convincing myself i had done some awful things and i really couldn’t take it anymore, im so scared to be by myself incase i convince myself i have done something and when my brain tells me i have i cant help but believe it and the more i go over and over the situation the blurrier it gets which convinces me more something bad has happened and i must just be blocking it out even though deep down i know i have not i think it doesn’t help either that i dont have an ocd diagnosis so i constantly say to myself what if its not ocd and ur just trying to convince urself it is it all feels like a never ending cycle to me and i really cant see a way out right now, how am i ever going to know for definite i didnt do these horrible things ? i also think this all stems from my fear of being away from my family and prison and the fear of prison and being away from my family overtakes the fear of being a horrible person which is the main thing im struggling with today because i am constantly saying to myself what if you dont feel guilty about the thing you think you have done your just more worried about prison does this make sense to anyone has anyone been through something like this 😞