- Date posted
- 1y
What if it was never OCD
Is anyone else scared to recover because that could mean that it isn’t OCD? 🙃🙂🙃🙂
Is anyone else scared to recover because that could mean that it isn’t OCD? 🙃🙂🙃🙂
That doesn’t mean you don’t have OCD. You will ALWAYS have any mental illness. When you recover? That means it doesn’t affect your life.
Just because you recovered does not mean you never had OCD, you simply recovered from it or know how to deal with it.
@Iwanttobehappy No I absolutely want to recover, sometimes I just worry when I start to feel better, that maybe all of those thoughts were something other than OCD and maybe I’m just a terrible person and I’m just pretending to have OCD to reassure myself
Wouldn't you want to treat it?
I totally understand! My checking and other easy to notice compulsions are happening way less than a couple of years ago. So now my brain is questioning if it actually is OCD that I have..or maybe it's always been something else. Or I'll be thinking that whatever I'm experiencing maybe shouldn't require therapy anymore. Like..maybe I'm just lonely or something. So then I feel wrong for seeking therapy and like I'm wasting my therapist's time.
And if it's because I'm just lonely..I get scared to recover. If I'm recovered, then I for sure won't need therapy. And that means I won't have a therapist that I see weekly, and that would be even more lonely than I am now! Nonsense brain!
I think this is a very common fear with people with OCD. I think many people don’t do ERP because they are scared therapy will reveal the thoughts are true and that they don’t have OCD and have been in denial the whole time. This is a symptom of OCD. It likes to keep us trapped in a cycle of fear and make us miserable x
These past few days I was fine. Minimal intrusive thoughts ,no anxiety etc(to add I'm on medication so maybe it's starting to work although it barely is 2 weeks) and today I got a sudden wave of anxiety and it started latching on some thoughts like" what if I'm in denial and I wanna break up with my bf? And what if erp doesn't work for me because I actually wanna break up with my bf?" But they didn't really stay long usually those thoughts would make me spiral for days or so, now they lasted for some hours. And now I'm trying to trigger myself into being anxious again because if I don't it means I don't have ocd and if I don't have ocd it means I don't love my bf and if I don't love my bf it means I have to break up. Idk if it makes sense but the lack of anxiety makes me wonder if I actually have ocd or not.
so i was on instagram and it came up with other signs of ocd then someone commented this doesn’t mean you have ocd now im stressed that its not ocd background - i had so-ocd for a few years then got treatment for it but am now on the waiting list for further treatment for other stuff but i dont have another theme which makes me feel like its not ocd my day to day life consists of touching the door handle every time you go past it or someone will die, and inability to send emails without re reading loads of times and getting other people to check because im scared i wrote something bad but the what if it’s not ocd thought is triggering me now and i don’t know what do
Does anyone else ever feel like they don’t feel “bad enough” to have OCD, or that they don’t feel “the right way” for it? Or like they’re just saying they have OCD as an excuse? Because i was so much better for like 3 weeks now and now im on my period and i started doubting again. So because of that im scared that i was feeling to good and that my fear is actually true.
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