- Date posted
- 1y
Pure O (Should I tell my new girlfriend?)
I told my last girlfriend of 16 months I suffer from Pure OCD sexually intrusive thoughts, and she ended our relationship.
I told my last girlfriend of 16 months I suffer from Pure OCD sexually intrusive thoughts, and she ended our relationship.
Sorry that happened. Take any advice on here with a grain of salt. It's up to you -- what do you think? I'd personally want to be with someone who's going to support my mental health. But I might or might not tell them at the start of the relationship or later, depending on the circumstances. But really, it comes down to, what do you think is personally right for you?
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@bekind94 I think that he did the right thing, personally i just decide to tell my bf about my Ocd next week, if he accepts that’s going to be great ! If not i know i’ll be sad but i’ll accept that, don’t have the choice ! if he loves me he should accept all my problems ! If not it’s okay, it’s life we learn.
@bekind94 Yes not everyone will understand our ocd, but if our loved ones don’t who will ?
Look it’s up to you. I have confessed way too many intrusive thoughts to my bf (tho he’s been amazing through it all, it has caused a lot of problems in our relationship because it took a toll on his own mental health) I think that it is okay to let your partner know what you’re going through, you don’t have to tell them details because I believe that can fall into confession. But I believe that if someone is willing to be with you and accept you have a mental illness, that shows they really care. If you don’t feel comfortable with knowing how to word it, maybe look up some articles of “people with sexual ocd, what their partner should know” or something, and show your partner an article on your mental illness, that might be able to better explain it in a way she would understand. Once again, your choice, but I think it’s important for people to know you suffer with a mental illness like ocd even if you don’t disclose details to them of it
Hi all, I’m new here and this is my first post. I was diagnosed with OCD back in March and started therapy, but was only able to complete a few sessions before my therapist had a baby. I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for 11 months and I’ve constantly been thinking about her past. More specifically something she told me that happened while her and I were speaking. In just two days it will be a year since she told me about the fact that she was assaulted by someone she met online. ( we both met online). It took place while we were talking. Originally when she told me, she told me she had sex with a guy she met online she told me she went over to watch a movie and then they had sex. Recently after we discussed it since it was weighing on my mind, she revealed to me that it wasn’t consensual and that she was sexually assaulted/raped. She told me she initially thought it was sex because it’s what she was sued to from her last relationship. She was abused and assaulted a lot by her ex, and this thing was normal for her. She said she didn’t realize how bad everything was until after we had been dating and she saw what true consensual sex was. The problem I have is that my brain knows every detail of what happened but keeps blaming her for her. My brain keeps telling me it was her choice and her fault and it justifies it by saying that she went over knowing it was a possibility he would want sex, so therefore it’s her fault. This has been straining me for so long because I can’t stop thinking about it. Everything seems to trigger a thought about it. I know inside what happened and what led to it, but I constantly think about it possibly being something else. I constantly think about every little detail. It has led me to having thoughts of “maybe I shouldn’t date someone that did this” as it doesn’t match my definition of the “perfect partner”. I have no idea what to do anymore. I obsess over things she had done with her ex in order to be loved by him. Like drinking, smoking weed, etc all things that I am against. I know she doesn’t do this anymore and was coaxed into it, but I’m constantly overwhelmed by thoughts of “she isn’t perfect because of XYZ so I shouldn’t be with her”. I won’t go into any details about the assault out of respect for her. I feel I’m constantly fighting myself and every good day I have gets overshadowed by one bad day :( I cannot see my therapist again until August and it worries me a lot.
Hi all, I would really appreciate some advice on how you told a loved one about having ocd, specifically a significant other. I’ve been with mine for over 5 years, and I just had a recent diagnosis of OCD. To be honest, with the subtype I have, it’s really crippling to deal with, and I have a major worry of my partner not understanding the subtype. I would love to get some advice on how to best approach it and how to provide understanding that I’m still the same person. Thanks!
Anyone have any advice for dating with OCD? Specifically the more taboo themes like POCD, incest ocd zoophilia ocd, harm ocd etc. I’ve never really dated in my life and the thought of approaching these conversations with people not in the ocd community is kind of scary
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