Melody 25
- Date posted
- 1y
Moral scrupulosity
I don’t understand the concept of using Maybe or maybe not. When having very taboo thoughts. Like I feel it makes my ocd worse. Can someone explain?
NicaNica
- Date posted
- 1y
You live “maybe, maybe not” and not necessarily say it because that can become a compulsion. The more you interact and react to your OCD, the more it acts up because you are signaling to the brain that what it is showing you is in fact, dangerous, and will continually show more of it as a dangerous response. The same goes for avoidance: the more you avoid something the more you are reinforcing the brain to fear that thing, place, or person. That is why you need to face your fears and your OCD to overcome them.
gp gp
- Date posted
- 1y
@Nica Hi Nica - I’m your experience, how would you apply this theory to SOOCD. So if the thought is “I feel like I’m gay” and that’s the obsession. How does this work when it comes to the brain protecting me? Or how does it work to show me it’s dangerous? I’m very stuck.
NicaNica
- Date posted
- 1y
@gp OCD latches on things you care about or that go against your morals so you have to take that into consideration. I suggest working with a specialist because OCD is complex alongside your background and personality and life experiences, but they’ll get to know you and then help you way more with specifics. But you’re just letting the thoughts and feelings be present without fighting or judging them and that’s how you lessen OCD symptoms.
gp gp
- Date posted
- 1y
@Nica Thanks Nica, makes sense. I have a therapy session on Monday. My question to her will be how do I accept the thoughts and feelings as intrusive when they feel real/true? It seems as though once I can acknowledge them as intrusions rather than fact/truth, then I will be able to create that space and get on with my day. I seem to get sucked into believing they are true, and then find it too hard to carry on with my day allowing them to be there. Does that make sense?
NicaNica
- Date posted
- 1y
@gp That will be discussed in therapy but definitely something to bring up and be honest with. I had to do this with POCD and it wasn’t accepting I was a monster, it was just letting the intrusive thoughts be there without fighting them.
gp gp
- Date posted
- 1y
@Nica How on earth did you go about accepting the thoughts despite how real and true they felt to you? Like I get people say “deep down you know” but I find I can’t lean on that. I’m so confused and get smashed by how true the feelings are? How did you overcome that?
NicaNica
- Date posted
- 1y
@gp Because I know it’s OCD and I was suicidal and hit rock bottom after many miserable years of my life. I was angry at everyone and at myself. I hated life. I hated everything in existence. So, do I keep doing what I was doing—which sucked and did nothing for me—or trust my therapist and the process? I trusted my therapist and the various therapies I went through and still do 100% trust my therapist. I’ve now been recovered from all my mental illnesses or 4 years now.
gp gp
- Date posted
- 1y
@Nica Makes sense to me. Congrats. I know you have responded to me many times and others. I want and need to just trust my therapist who tells me this is ocd. And tells me I have to accept the thoughts and do ERP. I get these periods of feeling like I can do it, then it comes crashing down when it feels so real and true. Almost like I feel as if I know the thoughts are true but don’t want them.
NicaNica
- Date posted
- 1y
@gp The moment you let go of the need to control your thoughts, then it will all be easier.
SirSalt SirSalt
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
You dont need to accept the thought or agree with it, you just need to accept that your brain had an intrusive thought
Melody 25Melody 25
- Date posted
- 1y
Like I saw a therapist online saying to use that and I he said that starves the ocd because it hates uncertainty. But I get taboos thoughts about racism and sometimes I get the thought “I’m a racist” and I was thinking how can incorporate the maybe and maybe not if we know that intrusive thoughts go against our values it’s like by using that I’m agreeing to the thought and that makes my ocd worse.
NicaNica
- Date posted
- 1y
@Melody 25 You realize that it’s an intrusive thought and you don’t interact with it. Go about your day.
Related posts
Jabre7
- Date posted
- 18w
Anyone else have a problem with this?
I can be way too hard on myself and beat myself up over the smallest slip up in regards to OCD. Sometimes it can feel like I'm gaslighting myself on what was "so blatantly and obviously a moral atrocity in thought and intent", when 95% of the time I'm not even sure what my own intent with dealing with these thoughts is or why I do what I do. It makes me feel like some shameless beast for "daring to even entertain the thought of something so VILE!!!" When I just get so confused and scared on moral issues, like my mind is pulled down a rabbit hole I can't escape until the tricks are done on me and it's too late, i've accepted such ideas I hate until that hate and trying to not give in convince me "it might not be that bad". It feels like anything, even the most mundane things can trigger this. This cycle happens mainly because I feel like there's "no way to escape committing more 'attrocities' in thought or compulsion anyway"...and these cycles become the basis for more of these incidents. there a way to stop this? There have been multiple times where I called myself the R word, and even knowing it's a slur I still called myself that because "I'm nothing if not deserving of such scorn". Any attempt to stop the madness makes it worse and it's like all this I talked about is so convincing I dare not question it until after the fact. Please help.
CJ_022
- Date posted
- 16w
Scrupulosity
Been having blasphemous intrusive thoughts about God. Then sometimes I’m really struggling and I feel resentful, sometimes even towards God, which I know is not right, I want to have reverence. But it feels like sometimes I think the blasphemous thoughts on purpose because of my anger. I don’t know if this is an OCD issue or an issue of my heart or both. But yeah I don’t know what to do.
It’s Going t...
- Date posted
- 12w
Question about uncertainty
I’ve been getting stuck in my understanding of OCD lately. When I have intrusive thoughts, although I have OCD, I’m not supposed to label them as part of my condition? Instead I just say maybe/maybe not? It feels like it takes the wind out of my sails a bit in recovery? Like having cancer, but when I go to chemo, I’m supposed to say “maybe I have cancer, maybe I don’t.” Would anyone be able to speak to this and increase my insight and understanding? Thank you!
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond