- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
Ultimately, we have to accept the uncertainty, I think that’s the only real way of beating this. You have to become comfortable with not knowing what your sexuality is, because HOCD is rooted in your constant doubt and questioning. If we just accept the thoughts that come through our heads, hopefully one day the anxiety and stress that comes with them will ease. Sexuality is a much more complex idea than just you’re either straight, bi, or gay. Every single human being is a spectrum, and even the most Hetero people will somehow feel attraction to the sam gender, even if it’s just physical admiration. But because we have HOCD, our sexuality is something we constantly put under the spotlight and we are constantly examining. Other people don’t do that, so they just shrug off those thoughts and feelings - whereas we don’t, we think they mean we’re gay! Hope I have helped. I know i’ve given you reassurance but. Oh well?♀️ just try and remember that you need to just become comfortable with yourself and the idea of not knowing?
- Date posted
- 5y
You can be sexually attracted to someone, but not romantically, remember that. Maybe you find somebody „hot“ that doesn’t mean you want to be with them. Many straight girls find other girls „hot“ and want to make out with them. There are even many girls who have sex with other girls but consider themselves „hetero“. I think we should separate sexuality and romantic „love“. Just my opinion. Maybe you get nervous around guys because of your low self-esteem? Because maybe you think you are not good enough, handsome enough to talk to boys? I hope I could help you a little bit
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you, that helped so much ❤️❤️
- Date posted
- 5y
And like I have like guys before and I reply have only had one crush on a girl. But I really just feel like I’m letting my OCD take over. And at the same I have very bad self-esteem, and I wanna date guys. Like whenever I see or talk to a guy I get so nervous, but whenever I talked it a pretty girl I don’t care. I’m so fucking confused. I think my brain fucked with me. And I got so scared because I didn’t want to be lesbian. And I’m religious and I’m just so scared and confused. I have all types of OCD like you name it. And I have a therapist, and I’m getting medication soon. But I just want my mind to be normal.
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you ❤️❤️
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
Sorry long post. Anyone feel like now they’re just in extreme denial. Like when I was little I noticed guys more than girls in movies and was more drawn to them. I remember changing my mindset to switch that. 98%of my life has been straight until recently. I felt drawn to some guys but never thought of it sexually. Always had girl crushes dreams and porn. Now I watch porn and I feel like straight takes longer and then I go and watch gay porn and feel nothing until I tell myself it’s two attractive dudes and love is love and imagine physical sensations and then it hits like suddenly. Like I have to convince myself it’s alright. Then when I try again I can do all that but feel nothing and then straight porn works. Idk if it’s just getting a fix or the first time works with anything or what but it’s confusing. On top of that I’ve felt girl relationships including my wife maybe miss something and a guy maybe matches that feeling that but then I feel like I’d be missing something without a girl or my wife. Idk I’ve had some rough times in life with male figures in my life but idk. I feel like I have to convince myself more and more that I’m straight even more than the first time I dealt with this. Can someone relate? Please
- Date posted
- 17w
I need too know that I'm not insane, really. I am 16 and for the past two weeks, this has been completely ruining my health and happiness. I only recently came out as a lesbian like 3 months ago after a lot of confusion about my attraction since I used to think I liked men. At first, I felt so sure that I liked women, but lately, I've been having these unwanted thoughts about the possibility of liking men. I never used to feel this way, but now, every time I look at a man, my brain obsessively fixates on it. It forces me to imagine kissing him, loving him, things I don’t want, and then tries to convince me that I do. It’s painful. The thought of this fills me with fear and anxiety, leading to panic attacks and breakdowns. I don’t want these thoughts. I hate them with every fiber of my being, but I’m terrified that one day I’ll act on them and somehow like it. I used to think I liked men, but back then, I was in a very unhealthy space in a time of escapism and something deeply parasocial. I’ve only ever liked the attention and validation a man could give me, but these experiences are somehow treated as further proof that I’m "bisexual." I’ve never been in a real relationship with anyone, which makes my brain constantly challenge me—telling me, “You don’t even know what love feels like.” It won’t shut up. It keeps obsessively trying to make me prove that I’m a lesbian, testing my reactions and questioning my certainty. Is this normal?
- Date posted
- 17w
As a lesbian with SO-OCD, I feel so helpless. It's truly exhausting because no one I know understands what I'm going through. The first response is always, "You're just confused" or "You don't have to know yet." But that's not the issue, I do know. I just never see any lesbians with SO-OCD so I feel so invalidated. These thoughts flood my brain constantly, forcing me to analyze my reactions to every man I see. I feel trapped in an endless cycle of "testing" myself, trying to prove that I don't like them. But my brain fights back, telling me I do want to love a man, making it feel real even though don't want it. It's terrifying. At this point, it's hard to even hold onto my identity as a lesbian because I'm so overwhelmed. I don't know if this is what real attraction is supposed to feel like, and that fear eats away at me. The truth is, when I think about being with a man, all I feel is disgust and fear-but my brain twists that into doubt. I hate it. I'm at the point where I'm scared I'm going to have to accept something I don't want because I don't know if this will ever go away. I miss who I was before all this.
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