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sometimes when I read all these posts I just start crying 😭😭 I hate that we are all suffering like this… ocd is not for the weak and its so frustrating 😭 Im really tired honestly… my ocd has its good and bad days but im just exhausted by all of it. I cant enjoy simple things because my ocd has to overcomplicate every little thing and create these “signs” as to what I am and what I am not. Ive had ocd for over a year now im a just upset 😭😭😭 I dont want to live like this forever… I have a lot of people who say, “you can talk to me if you want” and its really sweet 💓 but I dont think anyone can understand what I am feeling because even I cant… I dont know what im doing- how im feeling- who I am- or even what my values are 😭 ocd just makes me question everything. I am a 14 year old girl 😭😭😭 how am I supposed to know what to do? Ive talked mom about my ocd a few times and she tries to help but she doesn’t even understand 1/5th of what I go through daily. I appreciate her caring even if its a little but I just want some help 😭😭 I am a bit scared of therapy though. But im willing to try but im not sure if my mom will let me… Ocd just makes me feel so unlovable. I hate it.

Username: Mr.ocdMr.ocd

Date posted: 1y ago

Try your best to get your mom to let you get therapy for your ocd.

Username: yessyessyessyess

Date posted: 1y ago

I’m 28 now and experienced HOCD or SO-OCD when I was 15 and it was so hard. I didn’t know it was OCD and was such a painful experience, I didn’t get diagnosed or knew it was OCD until I was 24. I’m so happy this generation is having more access to mental health resources. And while it’s awful, it’s slightly comforting to know it has a name at such a young age. But one thing is knowing you have it, and another part is living with it. I wish someone would’ve told me when I was 15. You’re not alone, you’re strong, you’re brave! It’ll be hard, but you can do it. I remember thinking my world was over. But looking back at the last 12 years, I’ve accomplished stuff my 15 year old thought would never be able to accomplish. I’m still in the deep of an OCD flare, but I have hope I’ll overcome. Having this community at NOCD has been helpful. I hope you get the help you need, but just want to let you know you’re not alone!

Username: weregonnabeokayweregonnabeokay

Date posted: 1y ago

@yessyess wow this is making me emotional 😭😭😭 I cant even start to imagine how difficult it must have been when you were 15, and mental health wasnt as open 😭💔💔💔 im also sad to see that you’re still heavily dealing with ocd… but hey, you’ve come a long way 😭🫶 but thank you for your words, its really motivating 💓 I also had a question- have you tried therapy? I wanted to know if it actually helps… same with medication… does it help?

Username: yessyessyessyess

Date posted: 1y ago

@weregonnabeokay You got this! I did ERP therapy through NOCD a few years back for a year and was able to reach a semi-normal life. I took Sertraline after my OCD was calm for depression but helped significantly. I actually got back in Sertraline recently on a significantly lower dose and don’t feel as anxious, but rather find myself in the backdoor spike. If you’re comfortable, ask your mom for help especially if insured!

Username: weregonnabeokayweregonnabeokay

Date posted: 1y ago

@yessyess Okay, thank you so much 💓💓

Username: LucyA

Date posted: 25w ago

“I’m not okay mom”

I’ve got ocd (lol obs) and I’ve always had it, and I’ve tried to tell my mom so many times. I’m 17, and for years I’ve had so many horrific (what I call) flare ups. And it sometimes feels like a bingo game w the amount of types I’ve had. Sometimes I really do just wish I could go to my mom and say “mom I’ve got ocd and it’s really bad atm and I just wanna be okay again because I know it’s ocd but I’m sick of it being there can I please please get some help please it’s not okay please get me some help.” The ironic part is she’s a frigging nurse. And she must just be in some kinda denial. I’m just kinda waiting for this part to pass, I’ve made it 17 years w nobody to help me. I’ve only just told my friends what it’s like but I said things that weren’t currently in my flare up. I swear I’m on the verge of being sectioned for psychosis at this point. But I have made it this far- it will go away at some point on its own. But why won’t my mom help me. Why’s she so defensive- (I know why just like “why oh why won’t she. Yk?) but she’s so blinded by no no it’s all okay everything is okay. I’m sat in my room thinking the only way I could make her see- mom I rly am not okay is if I k*//ed myself. Like, then she’ll be like “…ohhh so she wasn’t okaaay” 💀🥹 if any one person could read this, and just type that it’s okay or something not as obs and generic as “it’s okay” but like just something to show someone’s listened. Thanks. I’ll ignore my trust issues, it’s an ocd app we’re all out here struggling but thanks x🤍🤌

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 24w ago

(PLEASE READ) feeling helpless

*PLEASE READ* I’ve been struggling with bad harm intrusive thoughts for a couple years now. They’ll go away for a couple of months then get triggered by something and start all over again. As much as I try to tell myself that I would never act on these thoughts I have a memory from when I was little that I was going to hurt my parents in their sleep and that memory has haunted me till now. Of course I didn’t hurt them but I thought it and I feel so guilty about it today that it makes me sick to my stomach. I love my parents so much and would never want to hurt them or anybody. I just want these thoughts to go away because they don’t line up with my values of who I am. But every time I tell myself that my thoughts are not facts that memory pops up making me feel like an awful person. I feel right now as if I don’t deserve any love from anyone because of these thoughts. I’m a believer of God and I feel as if I don’t deserve his love as well and that he has given up on me. These thoughts have also turned into a new theme of being scared I’m actually crazy and going into a psychosis. I’m just so scared and just want to be normal. As much as I tell myself ocd lies to you these thoughts have really scared me and I haven’t felt like myself in days. I’ve also struggled with health anxiety and intrusive suicidal thoughts. I know seeking reassurance isn’t good but I’m so scared.

Username: hopefulxmess

Date posted: 8w ago

Struggling mama losing hope

I’ve been dealing with a really bad flare up the last 2 weeks and i’ve been dealing with ocd on and off for years. I was finally feeling better today, So of course my ocd decided to bring up an old intrusive thought that was really upsetting and now i’m stuck on it again. The reason why I struggle so much to conquer my ocd is because I developed ocd as postpartum so my ocd targets my kids, the ones that mean everything to me. The intrusive thoughts range from mild to really disturbing. While I know deep down the intrusive thoughts aren’t true or me, the ocd makes it feel SO real and true which makes me feel like I HAVE to disprove the thoughts and with confidence but the ocd won’t let me. It also makes me question analyze and judge everything I do. It’s an endless cycle of pain and I just want to be a mom without ocd telling me i’m a horrible person all day every day. 😪

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