- Date posted
- 1y ago
Q&A About OCD w/ Me!
I haven’t done a Q&A in a long time, but I finally have a few hours of free time! Please ask any and all questions about OCD and I’ll do my best to answer ❤️
I haven’t done a Q&A in a long time, but I finally have a few hours of free time! Please ask any and all questions about OCD and I’ll do my best to answer ❤️
Not a q but wanted to say I remember you from the day I joined this app and it warms my heart to see ur here i appreciate all you’ve done🥹♥️ your posts always brought me comfort ♥️
@CurlyHairedPoodle Aww thank you! ❤️🌸
Are you one of the therapists on NOCD? Or just a really experienced patient? Or both? 😊 As always, your insight and inspiration is always appreciated.
@Joey_867 I’m not a therapist anywhere; I just do volunteer advocacy work on here and also in person. I am an ongoing patient though I have been subclinical for 4 years now after 6 years of intense therapy for OCD and PTSD specifically. Then I tackled GAD and depression.
@Nica Thank you for sharing. I was diagnosed with GAD and depression 13 years ago - it was blatantly health OCD (in hindsight). Shockingly a psychiatrist missed it. It amazes me how many of us go undiagnosed. Thankfully, it was caught this time around after 10 years of remission. Best 10 years of my life. Everyone listen to Nica!
@Joey_867 I’ve been missing too! Though it was bipolar and schizophrenia 😆 oopsy… it was PTSD from childhood trauma though.
@Nica Misdiagnosed* bad typo
How old are you if you don’t mind me asking? And when would you say your OCD was at its worst?
@Catlove9 I’m in my early 30s. It was bad from 2012-2016. And I had started therapy in 2013 for my issues, so it didn’t take for a while because I was fighting back a lot.
@Nica That’s awesome. I’m 36 and I wish I would have gotten treatment earlier because it’s the worst it’s ever been for me. I appreciate your answer.
@Catlove9 It’s better to seek out treatment now instead of waiting longer! Even if you feel that you waited too long, it’s better than never getting to it.
@Nica Thank you ❤️
Do you have any advice on where to seek therapy if someone doesn't have a lot of money? That would be really helpful:)
@Solar eclipse Nathan Peterson’s OCD course which is a one time fee.
I have no access to any specialists in OCD, as my state unfortunately sucks with accepting/offering free mental healthcare. I'm unsure if I have OCD because I've only just started looking into it, and I don't want to end up falling down a hole of hours and hours of 'research'. But I also feel scared to try coping mechanisms for a label that isn't tied to me because, in my head that makes me a bad person. Even if I'm the only one that knows. (I know that makes no sense 😔) Do you have any advice for for someone trying to tell if they may or may not be experiencing longterm compulsions/rituals that just seem 'normal' now?
@CatWhiskers I suggest looking into Nathan Peterson’s online OCD course so you can get the help you need. It’s a one-time fee and I’ve heard he can help with payment plans. Because you’re so deep in the compulsions and can’t easily differentiate between what is and is t one, I think jumping into a program is the best way to go even if it’s not 1:1 therapy.
@Nica Oh! I'll definitely look into that. I agree, I'm looking for anything that could help me because I am genuinely struggling. Thank you very much for your care and time!
@CatWhiskers No worries! 🤘🏻❤️ you got this!
Have you experienced SO-OCD?
@missbluesky Yes, I have
@Nica My problem is this: I’ve suffered from SOOCD since I was 12. I’m 22 now. It comes and goes in waves, but when it “goes” it’s still in the back of my mind; I just don’t do very noticeable compulsions like come on here or google or scroll on Reddit for hours. I still notice women, I still think about if maybe I am actually a lesbian or actually bisexual, but I don’t have as much anxiety around it. It still bothers me, but it isn’t as bad as it gets when I have a flare up, like I’m having now. These flare ups happen 2 times a year usually and last up to 3 months. I have never done ERP in a committed way— if I do ERP, do you think that will help? Or am I simply too far gone?
@missbluesky Yes, you should absolutely do ERP. You’re not too far gone at all.
@Nica Thank you for your reply. Also, do you think that’s a “normal” OCD cycle?
@Nica Like the periods where it’s not so bad but it’s still there in my mind ?
@missbluesky Intrusive thoughts will always be present; it’s a human thing. You need to learn not to give it any energy. No energy, it doesn’t become an issue.
I had another question. Not sure if you’ll see it. Back in August I went to the concert of my LIFETIME favorite artist. It was when I was still drinking and I got way too drunk. To the point I don’t remember the last hour of the night. Of course I woke up the next day thinking I must have assaulted someone in the bathroom. Well since the concert, I can no longer listen to this artist and I used to listen to him every day. I love his music but listening to him makes me feel immense guilt. Do you have any recommendations on what to do?
@Catlove9 Listen to the artist for self ERP.
@Nica Okay. Thank you, again. And thank you for all you do on here to help others. It’s very meaningful to people like me.
@Catlove9 You’re welcome ☺️
hi. so one big factor of my OCD is rumination. i met a guy who i have a crush on the idea of (idea bc there are red flags). my biggest fear is not finding true love, my ex told me no one else would deal with what i have (my ocd, specifically reassurance seeking and getting overstimulated after intimacy). a few weeks ago, my friends and family all gathered and tried to give me advice that sounded like “you’re shy and you’ll never find someone.” after that, i’ve felt off. i’ve been using an unhealthy coping skill, daydreaming, and i’ve just felt unbalanced. my ocd makes everything feel different sometimes, i can’t explain it. life, myself, almost like being in a dissociated state. has anyone else experienced that? i don’t know how to remain balanced during my off times and i know pms exasperates it all. i take ashwaghanda and omega 3s in a multi vitamin daily. i take them all together in the evening but i’ve missed three days recently and also messed with my rocky sleep schedule because of fun times with friends. i hope these supplements work, because i don’t know if i’d be brave enough for medication. i had a bad reaction on prozac and often am forgetful. i just have been battling my OCD consciously for almost ten years now and unconsciously for longer. i am so tired, as my mental health extends beyond my OCD. i’m in talk therapy with some cbt aspects but i only see her twice a month. i’ve broken down so many times and promised myself id get on track or that certain things would work, but it’s like i am stuck in a circle that gets smaller when i’m able to help myself. i just want to be normal. i want to be able to mess up my sleep schedule to enjoy good times and not suffer horrible consequences or fear that i will be entirely thrown off balance. i don’t want to worry or doubt or feel so dissociative that i squint my eyes for a moment and wonder why i feel so unreal. i will never understand why god has allowed me to go through this. i cannot let it be for nothing but i don’t know how much more to bend and contort my body and brain to get somewhere stable but how lovely it would be if i could. i don’t have much of a schedule right now, i get apathetic and give in with things from time to time. one thing can trigger me and i am back to square one wether in a week or month. any advice, any and all is so helpful. your stories, your thoughts. maybe feeling less alone and knowing what has helped you is exactly what i need right now. thank you 💗
Hi everyone, I’m Cayla. I’m a mom that’s lived with OCD since childhood, but my breaking point came more recently after having my son. I was consumed by terrifying thoughts—What if I hurt him? What if I did something awful without realizing it? I was so afraid of my own mind that I couldn’t be alone with him. The shame and exhaustion were unbearable, and I convinced myself I was broken. In 2024, I finally sought help. ERP therapy at NOCD was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but it saved my life. Even now, I have tough days, but I know I don’t have to be ruled by OCD. When my 12 year old daughter began showing signs of OCD, I felt overwhelmed with guilt. I never wanted her to go through what I had, but I knew what to do. I told her that I have OCD too and made sure she knew it wasn’t her fault—and that she wasn’t alone. One of the hardest parts of this journey was trusting someone else with my daughter’s OCD. I knew how vulnerable it feels to share intrusive thoughts, and I wanted her to feel safe. Her NOCD therapist was able to establish trust and genuine empathy from the start, and that relationship gave her the confidence to face ERP head-on. Seeing her build that trust made me certain she was in the right hands. ERP has helped both of us reclaim our lives, and it is beautiful to see my daughter managing her condition and making visible progress. Parenting with OCD while raising a child with OCD isn’t talked about enough, but I know so many parents are struggling with these same challenges. If you have questions about managing OCD while parenting, helping your child through ERP, or breaking cycles of guilt, drop them below—I’d love to share what I’ve learned. I’ll be answering all of the questions I receive in real-time today 4-5pm ET.
Looking back, my introverted nature and struggles to find belonging in high school may have set the stage for how OCD would later impact my relationships. I had my first relationship in high school, but OCD wasn’t a major factor then. It wasn’t until my longest relationship—six years from age 18 to 24—that OCD really took hold. The relationship itself wasn’t the issue; it was what happened after. When it ended, I became obsessed with confessing past mistakes, convinced I had to be completely transparent. Even when my partner was willing to work past them, I couldn’t let go of the intrusive thoughts, and that obsession landed me in the hospital. From there, my struggle with ROCD (Relationship OCD) fully emerged. For years, every time I tried to move forward in dating, doubts consumed me. I would start seeing someone and feel fine, but then the questions would creep in: Do I really like her? Do I find her attractive? Is she getting on my nerves? What if I’m with the wrong person? I’d break things off, thinking I was following my true feelings. But then I’d question: Was that really how I felt, or was it just OCD? I tried again and again, each time hoping I could “withstand it this time,” only to fall back into the same cycle. The back and forth hurt both me and the person I was with. By the time I realized it was ROCD, the damage had been done, and I still hadn’t built the tools to manage it. Now, at 28, I know I need to approach dating differently. I recently talked to someone from a dating app, and my OCD still showed up—questioning my every move, making me doubt my own decisions. I haven’t yet done ERP specifically for ROCD, but I know that’s my next step. Just like I’ve learned tools for managing my other OCD subtypes, I need a set of strategies for when intrusive doubts hit in relationships. My goal this year is to stop letting uncertainty control me—to learn how to sit with doubt instead of trying to “figure it out.” I want to break the cycle and be able to build something healthy without my OCD sabotaging it. I know I’m not alone in this, and I know healing is possible. I’m hopeful that working with a therapist will help me develop exposures and thought loops to practice. I don’t expect to eliminate doubt entirely—after all, doubt is a part of every relationship—but I want to reach a place where it doesn’t paralyze me. Where I can move forward without constantly questioning whether I should. And where I can be in a relationship without feeling like OCD is pulling the strings. I would appreciate hearing about your experiences with ROCD. Please share your thoughts or any questions in the comments below. I’d love to connect and offer my perspective. Thanks!
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