Good morning everyone. I struggle with uncertainty in general and am looking for mantras or ways to respond to anxiety when I feel like I need to know the answer right now. Sometimes the sense of urgency can make it hard to focus on other things aside from the thoughts so I will often engage in a form of reassurance seeking. Going to be starting NOCD therapy this week!
Not 100% sure this is what you’re looking for, so take this with a grain of salt. I struggle with a lot of rumination / mental compulsions — so I like to say “I don’t know” or “I am not certain right now” or “I am going to sit in this uncertainty” and then allow myself to experience my discomfort/feelings/thoughts as they rise and fall (rather then trying to resist the feelings/thoughts, which can make them stronger). This can essentially be an exposure — when I do it, it’s not necessarily always soothing and it can cause my distress to rise in the short term but over time it helps to decrease my distress / disarm my OCD. If you don’t feel confident doing it, then maybe wait to talk to your therapist about doing it. I also try to incorporate self-compassion here as well. For example, saying to myself “I don’t know _____, and this is making me feel _______, which is really hard. And it’s okay that it’s hard. Each person in the world or with OCD struggles with this emotion/difficulty from time to time. Let’s be gentle/kind with myself while I experience this.” Meditation/mindfulness has really helped me here as well. Hope this helps a bit — excited you’re diving into therapy! It can be so helpful!!
@Hobbit I also struggle a lot with mental compulsions and rumination. I also ask for a lot of reassurance, often asking the same question over and over again because it’s hard to accept the answer the first time because I never feel “sure”. These are all helpful strategies! Thank you for sharing 😁
How did you start meditating? Have you had a teacher? Was it hard in the beginning?
@Pluriel @Pluriel I use the Calm app (FYI Kaiser has a deal where members in some areas can get it for free). I don’t have experiences with retreats or working directly with a teacher. The calm app has lots of mindfulness options and meditations. I really like Jeff Warren’s guided meditations. He is delightfully down to earth. I would say that it can be hard to do, especially when I’m in an OCD spiral, but I’ve really let go of the idea of doing it “right.” Even if I sit for ten minutes and just notice that I’m feeling anxious while being repeatedly distracted by all my thoughts/fears, that still is helpful. It’s over time that I’ve noticed the positive impact on my life. Hope that helps! 🙂
I don’t relate to this now but I once did. You make your own certainty in some ways. Here’s an article that may help But, in the mean time you can say ‘ I know this is off because of how awful it feels and I’m safe to leave it alone.’ (Unless there is immediate danger) https://www.madeofmillions.com/articles/mistaken-beliefs-uncertainty-acceptance-ocd/amp
@ListenToTheWind *I know this is ocd
@ListenToTheWind This is a super helpful article! Thank you for sharing 😊
Sending you a big hug, I know exactly the feeling! I just had my first session so am very early in the journey. But I can relate 100 percent. I try to remind myself that I am capable. I can sit in the uncertainty. I’m stronger than I think I am 🙏 Curious to read others’ ideas ❤️
@Anonymous Thank you for sharing 😊
How do you guys cope with uncertainty? Today I was on my phone and then my sister came into my room, and as soon as I saw her I got an intrusive thought and got tense. I don’t want reassurance, I would just like advice on how to reduce the intensity of the thoughts, as we all know we can’t get rid of them
Does anyone have any mantras they repeat when they have an intrusive thought? I need some new ones
how do you guys really get yourself to accept uncertainty? when i watch ocd videos and read articles, i think i’m understanding what they’re trying to say. after all, i’m okay with not knowing if i’m gonna get covid even though that’s much more likely than, say, running someone over with my car, but the idea of never *truly* knowing the answer to one of my themes is what trips me up when the panic is horrendous. and when the panic is that high anyway, the theme feels real enough as it is. so what can i do? what were some strategies you guys did to better accept it?
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