- Date posted
- 1y
- Date posted
- 1y
Your correct it won’t end do it for your self wether or not the relationship ends or continues gotta get better now and yes i understand the details part. Me and my girlfriend would drink and I’d end up asking certain things hoping it wasn’t true and when it was it would send me in a downward spiral best thing that helps me it’s praying and forgiveness and understanding we all do stupid shit and things we wish never happened just keep fighting and looking for different perspectives and if you put in the work you’ll be a better person but I’m not completely over it either but I feel much better and am very hopeful so just keep pushing we got this ♥️
- Date posted
- 1y
My story is very embarrassing and full of shame. I’m in a long distance relationship. I ruminate on thoughts of my boyfriend’s ex fiancé whom he has no contact with - that she is prettier than me and better in bed. I know too many details about their relationship due to asking and wanting to know more information and I compare myself to her to see if I am better. The obsession got so bad that I foolishly ended up befriending her on social media, pretending to be a random person on the internet who liked her posts, then got into legal trouble for stalking. Despite what I did, my boyfriend forgave me and wants to continue to be with me. However, I continue to ruminate and compare. I am going on my 4th ERP session through NOCD, but don’t feel too hopeful. I’d rather just end the current relationship, but I know that is not the solution - no relationship is safe from RJOCD unless I treat it head on.
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
Hey! I struggle pretty bad with RJOCD with my current girlfriend. My friends told me she hooked up with a guy about 10 years older than her and it’s been super hard for me to not think about it and ask her about it. When I’m with her and I’m present she makes me so happy and there’s days I don’t care about the past at all. I feel your frustration though, it’s definitely hard. The gathering information and stalking on social media.
- Date posted
- 1y
@anonymous127278 Yeah I haven’t ask questions in a while but what I do know I’m stuck on like what did you do to them or how many times information that you shouldn’t know im struggling bad with that then I struggle with the fact that she told me
- Date posted
- 1y
Anyone here tried ERP for retroactive jealousy? If so how did you get on and did it damage your relationship or sexual desire in any way?
- Date posted
- 50w
@Anonymous https://drmichaeljgreenberg.com/
Related posts
- Date posted
- 20w
I’m new to the app and wanting to know who else experiences this form of ocd. Some background I was a therapist for over 10 years now I am out of the clinical space. So I have background knowledge of ocd but never knew much about relationship ocd. I realized over the last several years with my now fiancé, that I have a hard time just letting go in general, whether that’s an argument or statement or feeling. I want to be able to just accept things at face value and move on (and talk later if my partner is ready as needed). But when conflict arises I can’t disengage till there is a clear resolution. It’s causing serious strife as he can feel trapped and it escalates the argument. I am reading more and this sounds like relationship OCD. Anyone else experience this? Curious on what others have done to work on this for themselves. I do have a therapist but we are not doing work in this area yet as I am realizing this is an actual concern.
- Date posted
- 19w
Currently I have several different OCD fears that pop up throughout the week depending on the situation. I've noticed a commonality between all of them are the fears relating to memory/false memory. Today is the ROCD struggle I've been dealing with. I know OCD has been trying this on me lately because of how much I love my spouse. They are my absolute best friend and she's my world. I value our marriage and friendship more than anything. OCD has latched onto one specific female coworker. And I don't even know why because even if I were single I wouldn't be into her. Even still, OCD makes me think I've cheated on my wife every time I'm alone with this coworker at work. Always starts as a what if, followed by imagery, followed by feelings that I must've actually done something and can't remember it. Usually fearing I've kissed her. It hurts because I know I'd never do that to my wife and I love her so much...the idea of losing her kills me, especially if it were the result of something I did. Just wanted to vent. Feel free to share your experiences or vents as well
- Date posted
- 19w
Hey everyone, First time posting here! Wanted to share my story for some support but also to hopefully make others feel less alone. In short - my ROCD has made such a mess of my personal life. I was in a great relationship until spring of last year, at which point we separated mainly due to my ROCD. I struggled heavily with OCD about 10 years ago (harm based intrusive thoughts, sexual orientation ocd, etc). It took a lot of work but I was able to mostly overcome my struggles and truthfully, hadn’t given ocd much thought since then. I thought I was cured. And then 10 years later I am in a very fulfilling relationship with a girl I really love, but at about the year mark in my relationship things really changed. She wanted to have a conversation about next steps (moving in, marriage, kids, etc) and at that point my brain just went into panic mode and the ocd took over. From that point on, I was constantly scanning for red flags, felt very reserved when it came to any sort of statement or commitment and tended to avoid anything that would indicate I was committed to a long term future. It was not that I didn’t love it was just that my ocd was doing anything to keep me from making a big commitment. It eventually got a point where we had a big conversation about breaking up or staying together and my OCD convinced me that it was safer and that I would do less harm to her if we ended things, which was incredibly devastating to me. At the time I felt like my obsessing over small red flags were normal and that I needed to protect myself. I just had no clue it was ROCD. I spent the next 8 months missing her and kicking myself for my mistakes, and I eventually got the courage to reach out and see if she’d be willing to talk again, which she was. But the problem is, at this point I still didn’t know it was ocd. So when we talked again I was still plagued by ROCD as all the same thoughts and feelings came flooding back. We tried to talk through things but once again I was unable to make any sort of commitment to the future so it went nowhere. Once again, I am feeling very sad and angry at myself for not being able to handle ROCD. I feel like I let it control me twice and has robbed me of a lot of happiness and hurt someone I care very much about. I understand it’s probably not best to just look at ourselves with anger and guilt all the time but it’s hard not to when you feel like you just caused so much harm. Anyone feel like they can relate? Or if anyone is going through something similar I am happy to chat as ROCD can really be tricky. Thanks
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