- Username
- Tea and Honey
- Date posted
- 21w ago
Request for increased communication and engagement.
Let’s Talk More
Hello!
Let’s Talk More
Hello!
I feel guilty when i don’t feel guilty, in a sense? I feel like OCD has ruined everything around me , and i started going against my compulsions then when a hiccup happens like i get sick i can’t but feel like it’s because i went against those compulsions. I know walking with God calls for sacrifice, and people will deny a sweet treat here and there or fast from food i just feel guilty that i don’t know if im being called to fast or i’m being undisciplined when i don’t.
@sarah045 I think when we have OCD, it’s a good idea to generally not do the little things that you think you might be called to do (unless it is very clear that you should be doing them). A lot of times, we think God is speaking to us when he is not. When we have OCD, we only know how to live by rules. That’s all we know. And often we are just putting rules on ourselves , but we are thinking that God wants us to do something. The catch comes when we fall into the “what if” trap. We can choose not do the things we thought we might be called to do, but then our brains start worrying “what if” we disobeyed God? Would something bad happen? We can go against our compulsions (like we are supposed to) and then our brains can worry “what if” that caused something bad to happen (like getting sick)? Here’s the thing. We can’t play the “what if” game. You have to go against the compulsions even if bad things happen to happen (and then trust that they weren’t actually CAUSED by your OCD). For example, my friend felt like if she touched a road sign, her dog would die. So her brain was saying, “Don’t touch the sign, don’t touch the sign, don’t touch the sign.” But she went against the compulsion, and took her freedom and touched the sign. Guess what? Her dog did die. (But it wasn’t because of her OCD.). However, this incident strengthened the OCD’S power in her life. The OCD got to say, “See, I told you something bad would happen. You better listen to me next time.” That is why we have to go against the compulsions no matter if what happens is good or bad. This is where trust in God comes in. Don’t feel guilty if refuse to do your compulsions. Instead, you could almost feel guilty for DOING the compulsions, because that means we are not trusting God.
I was actually just thinking about starting another fast because it feels like i’m being called to do so , when your notification popped up! I’m not a stranger to having my fair share of health issues so i am weary about fasting and people say that if i feel called to do something then do it, i feel guilty for overthinking it. OCD has made everything peaceful in my life a nightmare i’m just so scared of everything im scared of actually enjoying anything.
@sarah045 I don’t think you should fast. God wants us to fast in a mentally, emotionally, and spiritually healthy way. When we have OCD, we can’t do that. We are driven by guilt and so on. So I think you should give yourself a break and not fast. It could very easily become a compulsion. If God wants you to fast some time in the future, He can make that clear, and you won’t feel guilty about it. However, I don’t think people with OCD are ready to fast until they have really gone a long way in their OCD healing journey. This is because we make everything into an obligation and a rule instead of doing something should bring us closer to God.
Me too, I thought that anything I could enjoy was bad and god wanted me to sacrifice it. One thing that really helped me was praying to God for what I was afraid of not happening in the morning, so everytime during the day I felt guilty for doing something like having chocolate I would tell myself 'I don't listen to OCD, I trust God has heard my original prayer.' Maybe you could do something like 'I don't listen to OCD, I trust God knows I am trying to do the right thing' to help you through it?
@Preena yes it’s always worth trying and that step of faith, i get sad cause i felt so good in my journey with Jesus and OCD ruined that, i tend to obsess over numbers, so 3 day fast but then i feels right when i say 3 hours it’s odd?? I completely understand about being confused i used to have so much clarity on things now it feels foggy, and most of the time i feel like a horrible person, but i have faith God will see us through this!
@sarah045 Yess I really think God will get us through this! It is extremely tough. There's a really big difference between genuine faith (what you were doing before) and then OCD attacking it and making you feel forced to do things. I think that when we give up things because of OCD (e.g fasting because we feel compelled to do it) then Jesus won't be watching at all and but if we give up things to feel a genuine connection with God then we are actually progressing. I'm not Christian but the same applies :) I really don't think God would punish you for not giving into compulsions as he knows you have OCD. I also know it's easier said than done but I wish you the best with this!! :)
@Preena Yes, I so agree!!!!!
@Lostaway I'm sorry you went through that :( I can't believe that this is a common symptom of OCD I thought I was the only one who felt like I had to give up things. I hope you are doing better now!!
@Tea and Honey Everything I said is basically what you have told me! I am so grateful for your help
@Preena I am so glad to have met you!! You are going to go through medical school and be an awesome doctor some day!! 😃😃
@Tea and Honey Ah thank you that is so kind!! I don't even think I'd be able to study ike I am right now without your help. I actually have an exam tomorrow which is really scary
@Preena You are going to do great!! Don’t worry about it:):):):):)
Hi! your advice has really helped a lot , even today it helped me nip some of the OCD tactics in the butt
I hear you about being afraid to enjoy anything. This is VERY common with OCD. A lot of people struggle with this. I struggle with a form of this also. Just remind yourself that God DOES want you to enjoy your life. He wants you to eat cookies and watch movies and laugh with your friends. This is the type of life you would want for your children. And this is the type of life that God wants for you.
Big hugs!!! OCD is horrible, but we learn so much along the way. And you are doing the right thing by seeking answers to the pain you are experiencing internally. I am so sorry for all the pain. Sometimes, when we have OCD, we don’t even notice how much pain we are in—but it’s a lot. Big hugs. You got this!!! You are on your journey with God to getting better and better:):) And remember, some of God’s very special saints have had this affliction. So if you have it, maybe it is because there is something special about you. Maybe you have great potential for God, and you are being attacked for it. But that’s okay, because God will use this trial to refine you and build your character. 💙💙💕😀😀
Hi!! This is definitely a better way of communicating :) We have a lot of the same symptoms! I was thinking of fasting too for a few days and I thought god wanted me to go without food and water for 3 days if I got into my dream university and that if I couldn't agree to it I wouldn't go. I think we really have to realise that God wouldn't do the things that OCD is telling us to do! But it is super confusing :(
@Preena Yes!!! God would never tell you to do that. But OCD definitely would!!
Even today it used to take me 3 hours a night to pray before I went to sleep but now I can pray within 5 minutes by thinking 'i promise on my dad's life to finish the prayer within 5 minutes' and this has significantly helped me. I don't know if it is the right thing to do though because it is technically a compulsion! And sometimes my OCD usesit against me e.g 'promise on your dad's life to not watch a show' and then I can't watch it
@Preena That is so good you are only praying for 5 minutes!!! You are making great progress! Don’t worry, you will get the other things sorted out in time too :):)
@Tea and Honey Thank youu!! I really hope you are doing well with your OCD symptoms too!
@Preena Thank you! These days are better than ever. There’s always a few things I struggle with every day though, lol
@Tea and Honey That's good your doing better!! I guess managing it is the most important thing :)
@Preena Yes, it’s a journey. You get better one step at a time. You can’t there all at once 😀😀
so tired lately ocd is a pain
@sarah045 What’s going on?
@Tea and Honey it’s just so bad lately i feel good i have really high highs and my lows are so low i feel like as soon as one thing goes wrong in my life im ready to walk away from everything my relationships my faith, the thoughts against God are so draining i repeat scripture to myself and sometimes it works sometimes it doesn’t , i can’t tell if im having so many thoughts because it’s spiritual warfare or my ocd is just on blast. i just want to be okay i don’t want to doubt Gods goodness
@sarah045 Can you explain more to me about the thoughts? Are you having constant blasphemous thoughts against God? I used to have that. I had those thoughts every second of the day. I didn’t know it was OCD. But now I know what it is. And I know what to do about it. You are not supposed to avoid or fight the thoughts. You are not supposed to stop them. You are supposed to just let them be in your head. Just let them run. I know it is uncomfortable to do that. But it is the path to gaining more freedom. One therapist described it for me like this: Imagine a great big tree next to a river. Sometimes leaves on the tree fall off and flow down the river. The leaves are your thoughts. You watch them fall off and float down the river. But you don’t try to stop them. When you stop trying to fight off the thoughts, you can gain so much of your life back. Then you don’t have to be spending mental energy always trying to stop them or fix them. Is this what is happening to you?
@Tea and Honey yes they’re constant , i’m just scared of getting used to them it’s like if i get used to them then i must really feel that way
@sarah045 It looks like you have a belief/fear that if you get used to the thoughts, then you agree with them. It’s time for you to challenge that belief! :) One of the main parts of ERP therapy is learning to let the thoughts go and do whatever they are going to do. It doesn’t matter if you get used to them or not. I would suggest that you practice letting the thoughts run through your head without doing anything with them. This is easiest with a therapist who does ERP. Have you tried ERP therapy yet? Also, I would probably not say Scriptures in your head because it is probably a compulsion (which is something that is done to decrease the anxiety caused by the thoughts). You can’t do anything to mitigate the anxiety caused by the thoughts. You have to let yourself FEEL that anxiety and just let the thoughts run. Don’t try to say Scripture in your head to “fix” the thoughts. That’s an OCD trap. 💙💙💙
@Tea and Honey honestly saying the scripture makes the thoughts louder sometimes it’s so odd
@sarah045 You can’t fight against the thoughts. If you do anything to fight against them (including saying Scripture), that will only make them worse. So you need to practice not fighting them. ERP therapy could make a big difference for you! Nathan Peterson on You Tube is good too, but he has so many videos that it’s a little hard to find the right video that addresses a specific question
@sarah045 I think a lot of religious OCD comes down to the idea of this: “Is God really okay if I ignore the thoughts in my head? Do I really have permission from God to do ERP?” I think when are stuck in religious OCD, we feel like we are serving God by doing the painful effort of trying to follow all the OCD rules and trying to fight off the thoughts. But you need a paradigm switch. It is really important to learn that you are actually serving God by taking steps of faith that go against all the OCD rules and learning to live in the freedom that God provides. I didn’t know truth this for many years. But it has been very important for me to learn that my journey of faith with God is pleasing to God when I go against what the OCD demands. It takes more faith to go against with the OCD wants you to do than it does to simply follow the OCD rules.
@Tea and Honey it’s just so hard because the hard things that God wants us to do like fasting waking up at hours studying i feel like it me genuinely not doing enough or im using OCD as a crutch
@sarah045 God doesn’t want to make your life miserable. I dont think He is going to want you to be fasting right now. You have too many struggles to be in a healthy mindset to fast. If you think you HAVE to fast, that is probably just OCD trying to get you to follow another rule. God does not give rules to his children. Just like a a dad doesn’t make his kids miserable. Instead, God wants to heal you of the rules and the OCD (which is painful and making you miserable). Take a journey of faith. Step away from the things that OCD wants you to do.
@Tea and Honey i just want to be normal
@sarah045 I hear you. Big hugs!! 💙💙💙 Things can get a lot better with the right therapy. Remember that God will use this difficulty in your life to refine your character. You will learn things that you wouldn’t learn otherwise. Your faith will be stronger 💙💙💙
@Tea and Honey have you ever felt so much peace in prayer and as soon as you leave prayer the peace Jesus gives goes away? Jesus is good Jesus is strong in just don’t know who i am anymore i feel like i don’t know myself anymore
@sarah045 Don’t worry. God’s love for you does not change when you stop praying. God’s feelings toward you don’t change when you stop praying. One thing that I have learned is this: When we don’t feel God, it’s okay. It’s just an opportunity for us to grow in faith that He is still with us, even when we don’t feel Him. In fact, sometimes God chooses for us not to feel him because he wants us to live by FAITH. I have experienced this in my own life. I was used to hearing from God almost every day. And I came to a period in my life when I wouldn’t hear from him for weeks and weeks and months. But it’s okay. When I have a long period of time not hearing from Him, I know that He is teaching me to live by his words. And I have to learn to live each day without reassurance. Don’t worry if you feel like you don’t know yourself anymore. When we have OCD, we have our feelings going all over the place. We can feel a separation from reality or a separation from our personality. It’s very normal to feel that way. When you think about it, it makes perfect sense for our brains to do things like that when we deal with the constant mental stress of OCD. In fact, Mark DeJesus has a video about “depersonalization” and “derealization” because this is a normal response to OCD. You are not alone!!! Your symptoms are classic OCD symptoms, including the thoughts against God. I used to think I was the only one who had constant, repetitive, negative thoughts about God. Then I read the book, “Can Christianity Cure Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder” by Ian Osborn. I learned that blasphemous thoughts against God are SUPER common in the OCD community. You are okay!!! Don’t worry if your feelings are worried or detached or don’t make sense. That is all normal. Everything is okay!! Big hugs!! 💙💙💙
Love to hear that. I am here for you if you have more questions. Anything else bothering you?
If anyone has anything they want to talk about, or if you'd like to vent/talk about anything, or if you just want to chat, or anything, I'd love to listen! :) If you need something specific out of a conversation (i.e. you just want me to listen and don't want me to comment or give my opinions or thoughts), let me know and I'd be happy to oblige! And, of course, I'm no therapist. Just thought I'd give that disclaimer. Also, if I respond in a way that seems like the conversation would logically be over but you still want to talk, I'll still be ready to listen! Sometimes I don't have a bunch to comment, but I'll listen for as long as you want to talk! And here's a fire for a fireside chat if you want 🪑🔥🪑🛋 Love you guys!
Does anyone needs to talk about their struggles or just literally anything?
Hello I'm just posting to see if anyone needs to talk about your day or what's bothering you! Feel free to comment
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond