Porn and rocd

I have this constant feeling of needing 100 percent certainty in my relationship of being wanted physically and sexually by him. Plus also reassurance of if he still loves me.. it’s a loop!!!

Anybody else use their lack of sexual history as a way for OCD to use as evidence? I just start remembering all the times I could have had sex but didn’t. I also had a HUGE porn addiction that made it so difficult to function. I remember that I was always afraid of having sex with anyone other than my ex because I was emotionally abused and I felt like if she found out, she would get mad and at the time, that would break me. I’d always overthink about sex and what could happen if It happened at that moment. My mind would fill with questions and I just would end up saying I rather not have any sex. My therapist believed I could have shown signs of OCD early on. I believe that’s what’s happened then and now. I don’t like guys romantically and I love getting excited for a woman. I love that feeling of seeing a pretty girl and getting the chance to know her. It makes my heart so happy. But I would do everything I can to avoid speaking with a guy, even if he was not conventionally attractive. Porn makes me feel like I could turn gay since I watched it so much. I’ve lost interest in watching porn which is a good thing but now ocd is like “oh you don’t get turned on by porn anymore, and those videos had girls in it so that must mean you don’t like girls anymore.” Like how stupid is that. I also saw on Reddit and Quora that people were saying porn can change your attraction/make you lose interest in girls. I know Quora and Reddit are OCD’s best ways at scaring you and these forums are never to be taken seriously, but man does it trigger you. Anyways if you made it this far, thank you. I’m just overthinking a lot today

hey, my boyfriend recently came to me and opened up to me about him thinking he has ROCD. i am trying my absolute hardest to understand it all, and came to the realization that i might have it too. we have been dating for almost 2 years now and we’ve been on such a good streak lately if that’s what you want to call it. the bad times aren’t truthfully bad at all. but i get so anxious when he goes out to the bars without me every weekend. and then he gets anxious because of how i respond too it. so basically im just asking for some tips i guess, because i truthfully do think he is the one and could spend the rest of my life with him. but there has got to be an easy way to get past this.