Books

Does anyone have any tips on how to handle contamination OCD?

Hey, I’ve been trying to grow in my Catholic faith, but my ocd makes it very hard. I read a passage about a saint going through a great ordeal and start panicking that I need to give up everything and be martyred painfully. I seem to always hyperfocus on unhelpful book passages that make me afraid of God and see Him as a tyrant. I admire those who can read others words on faith, but I get suicidal, self harm, or turn away from God because I get sucked in so deep. That’s the obsessive part of ocd. Do you have any tips on how to get past this?

So for as long as I’ve been alive I’ve loved horror/ thriller movies and books. I really only enjoy reading thriller books. Since my harm ocd hit I have slowly started back reading thriller again, but I have to check for triggers before each one I read. There’s been a few books that I was really loving that I had to stop reading because something that would trigger my ocd would come up ( my theme is going crazy becoming dangerous , schizophrenia etc ) so if a character in a book starts hearing voices or something, I get so anxious. I want to be able to read and watch horror / thrillers again. Do I simply need to just continue reading / watching and sit with the anxiety?