TOCD - Can you relate

Is there anything that those of you who do identify as trans experienced that made you realize you were trans, and it was not anything else. For those of you dealing with TOCD is there anything you feel like you experience that you think says you are trans? For those of you who are trans. I struggle with breast discomfort, such as feeling and being aware of them all day everyday. Feeling the bra, sports bra on my skin. When I look in the mirror I feel like I am not sure if my thoughts say I don’t like them or if it’s my negative thoughts speaking. It’s frustrating and infuriating, and I want to know whether these thoughts will ever go away or if this is inevitable regardless of OCD.

regretfulrain

Date posted: 20w ago

trans guy here! being trans isn’t so much about dysphoria (some trans people don’t have any gender dysphoria) but more about euphoria and how you feel comfortable. there is also no harm in exploring but if you find yourself scared of being trans (for non safety reasons of course) then it isn’t likely because when you envision yourself as a different gender instead of feeling gender euphoria you get anxiety.

diff

Date posted: 20w ago

If they are not bothering you within sensory or gender dysphoric parameters, I think you may have to attempt addressing the awareness of your chest at face value. I experience discomfort with my chest because of various reasons. I do not enjoy having to compact my chest to comfortably exercise. I do not enjoy the sweat/contamination buildup that happens with long term breast-torso contact. But the number one factor is the fact my chest is one of my biggest giveaways to my biological sex. My chest identifies me as female despite my voice & facial hair, and I despise it.

MountainLion

Date posted: 20w ago

Could you explain what you mean by the first part some more. What would it mean for it to bother me within sensory or gender dysphoria parameters? And what would it look like to address the awareness at face value?

diff

Date posted: 20w ago

@Anonymous Sensory: the experience of having breasts irritating you physically. Gender dysphoria: recognizing breasts as something associated with femininity/the female gender and not wanting to identify with those labels. Addressing the awareness is alluding to using ERP to go through the internal dialogue necessary to become comfortable with the compulsion of fixating on your chest. I cannot really inform you much on the subject here as I’m not a professional. This would be something to ask a therapist to guide you through.

MountainLion

Date posted: 20w ago

@diff Thank you

landonw

Date posted: 23w ago

Why Does It Seem So Real?

Lately, I have been able to manage my OCD thoughts kind of. They’re still there but I kind of push them away? I know that pushing them away doesn’t help but it’s been my only way to survive. I get scared often about things like clothes or my voice or how I present myself. I get scared that I want to dress differently or act differently and it scares me. I know for a fact I don’t want boobs or anything like that, but my mind constantly is like “What if?” and it kills me. It has ruined everything for me. Sometimes I can’t even look in the mirror because I get scared that I won’t like what I see. I’ve also been afraid because I find myself relating to many female characters, or I want to act like them. Like Pearl from Steven Universe. I want to be graceful and elegant like her, but I don’t want to be a girl you know? My mind constantly pushes these thoughts of what if and images. Because I am not like most guys. Which I know is okay. It just freaks me out. It makes me question every aspect of my being. I know who I am, but I know that the only way to move forward is to accept that maybe I don’t.. It’s just a lot.

issphra 🫶🏻

Date posted: 17w ago

worried about intrusive thoughts during sex

Hi everyone, I wanted to reach out to see if anyone else has experienced something similar with OCD and intrusive thoughts. I’ve been struggling during moments of intimacy because intrusive thoughts, particularly ones related to POCD, feel so ‘sticky’—like they’re all I can picture. Even though I really want the thoughts to go away, they persist, and I’ve been trying not to avoid intimacy because of them. However, that makes me feel like I’m somehow ‘enjoying’ the thoughts or images, which I really dislike. It’s like my brain is playing this awful trick, and it’s leaving me feeling confused and gross. I guess I’m supposed to not let the thoughts bother me and continue as if nothing’s wrong, but I’m scared that by doing so, I’m almost training myself to get off to them or something. This fear makes it so hard to trust myself in those moments, and it’s been overwhelming. If anyone else has been through this, how do you handle it?

issphra 🫶🏻

Date posted: 10w ago

Help, Meta OCD/POCD?

I’ve been feeling the urge to avoid intimacy or purposefully engage (for reassurance that I won’t give into a compulsion) because of intrusive thoughts and fear that I’ll “check/test” my reactions. My OCD is making me so scared that I’ll purposefully think of a child and try to see if I like it. It’s so complicated but I guess I’m mentally checking if I would mentally check during intimacy. I’ve even envisioned myself checking and it’s making me so nauseous. I know it’s a compulsion like any other but the sound of “touching yourself to the thought of a child” sounds atrocious and vile. I’m terrified I’ll automatically start checking next time I am being intimate. I truly feel so worried. If anyone has gone through something similar, I’d appreciate hearing your experience. Or if anyone has any advice?

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