shabby123
- Date posted
- 5y
minfoyminfoy
- Date posted
- 5y
( THIS COMMENT MAY BE TRIGGERING) Hey! I’m a lesbian, and sometimes I get really bad intrusive thoughts that I’m straight. I’ve known since I was 8 years old that I was gay, so it’s part of me, it fits and it sits and I identify that way, so with any other theme it will hit a part of you, you don’t identify with. Sometimes I have thought my whole life is a lie and that I’m actually straight, it’s awful because it’s not who you are. This is from a different perspective, it’s not about whether it’s gay, straight or anything, it’s not about being scared you’re gay it’s about having something foreign in you that you aren’t. Hope this helps.
WetandgushyWetandgushy
- Date posted
- 5y
Because its not a part of you. If You don't identify as that label It can be very scary; you might think your identity or partner is wrong as a result of it. Hopefully that clears it up a bit :)
Mod22Mod22
- Date posted
- 5y
It is kind of insensitive, firstly because we were straight our whole lives and then We had Ocd and now we are really going through a lot because that’s not what we want for ourselves it doesn’t align with our sense of self if being gay aligned with it we wouldn’t be worrying about this.
shabby123shabby123
- Date posted
- 5y
It's not insensitive to wonder why. I just don't understand why it would scare someone so much
Mod22Mod22
- Date posted
- 5y
@shabby123 Yeah Well I took it too deep I’m sorry but that’s my reasoning and I feel like all of us mostly feel that way
Mod22Mod22
- Date posted
- 5y
@Mod22 And I feel like it’s the same with most ocd themes as well like POCD and harm ocd
hateocd123hateocd123
- Date posted
- 5y
@shabby123 It's not so much being gay itself that bothers us, it's our whole identity being ripped from our hands.
shabby123shabby123
- Date posted
- 5y
@Mod22 Sorry if I caused any offense that really wasn't my intention x
Ty94Ty94
- Date posted
- 5y
@hateocd123 Loss of control
shabby123shabby123
- Date posted
- 5y
Thanks so much everyone I understand it a lot better. Not actually being gay that bothers you, it's about not feeling yourself and I can see why that is scary. Im on here because I have health ocd. Every ache and pain I Google my symptoms and get myself scared. I've had suicidal ocd where I thought I was out of control of my own body and was going to kill myself against my will. I really do know what it's like to have intrusive thoughts and I am here for every single one of you x
Mod22Mod22
- Date posted
- 5y
I hope you heal too I have on and off health Ocd I understand what you going through Hocd is killing me I don’t even love living I don’t even want to live anymore not saying I wanna commit suicide but I don’t want to live
hateocd123hateocd123
- Date posted
- 5y
@Mod22 I feel exactly the same. I hate being alive, but I don't want to kill myself because I don't want my loved ones to be in pain. I also have no idea what's on the other side so that's enough to scare me away from it in itself.
Related posts
FlavoredTrades
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 22w
Is "homosexual OCD" usually homophobia
If you truly aren''t homophobic you wouldn't be afraid of being gay unless in very specific cases of bisexual cycling, what is the difference?
Ariana ♡
- Date posted
- 20w
Question for queers w sexuality ocd
Is anyone here actually gay and has/had sexuality or religious ocd? I don't have it at all haha I'm a lesbian myself without socd or religious ocd but I'm just curious: what's it like and how did you deal with the whole "biggest fear coming true" thing?
bobby.$
- Date posted
- 13w
I need some advice
So I haven’t been on this app in a while. But I just want advice on how to overcome this. I’m now 18 and I’ve been trying out dating apps. I’m not gonna lie I’m kinda picky when it comes to dating only because I plan on dating to marry…so I take it a bit more seriously. But for some reason it’s so hard to click with people on these dating apps. So my friend was helping me through this dating apps process. I told her that I wasn’t interested in this guy I was texting anymore because of the way he was responding to my messages. And she says maybe you’re gay…this is honestly the sixth time (I’m definitely over exaggeration but this isn’t the first time someone had said this to me) someone has ask/said this. Every time someone says this it literally sends me down this spiral of are they seeing something I’m not seeing. Despite never having a crush on a girl my mind goes down this loop of overthinking. And when I say I don’t want that lifestyle or I don’t really find pleasure in being apart of the lgbtq community my mind is like in denial. I just wanted to have a fun teenage dating experience and now every time I open the app I always think what if I really am gay and I’m just in denial…or what if the reason why I’m not connecting with anyone is because I’m really into girls. Since i’m also religious, my mom wants to go what you’re denying who we are because of your religion. And I tried to reassure myself by saying I would know if that was the case like I would feel deep down who I’m truly attracted to and know that I’m trying to cover it up by dating men. This whole thing is so mentally taxing because I was going through this all throughout my senior year of high school and I’m not going into my freshman year of college so. Like I literally felt so much anxiety next to one of my classmates who was gay and a masculine presenting. I feel like if I would’ve told this to anyone, they’d say of course you’re in denial. But ig reply if you can relate
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