Am I disabled?

So I obviously have ocd, more specifically severe (29 out of 32 on CY-BOGS), and it's contamination ocd mainly. I also have autism, were not sure what level but I'm probably mainly level 1 with level 2 traits. I also have combined type adhd, managed (medicated) pmdd which is not even noticeable because of my birth control, and mild/managed GERD, and moderate chronic eczema which ive had my entire life. I've also developed mild to moderate motor tics and a nightmare disorder paired with ocd and adhd fueled insomnia. I feel like I will never live life the way someone else without my conditions will, even if the physical conditions are all managed, besides eczema. My autism and ocd are the ones taking over my life and I am not able to go to school full time, work a full time job (yet), live alone, have children or high maintwnce pets even if I want them, and I'm having great difficulty driving. I have great difficulties communicating when I'm struggling inside so I had to learn sign language with my girlfriend so we can communicate when I'm unable to speak/or at least elaborate how I feel. I also have an auditory processing disorder. Am I disabled? Am I allowed to say I have disabilities and am impaired and disabled? I very much feel disabled but my parents get almost furious when I say something relayed to being disabled. *furious*. Why is that?

Generiname

Date posted: 21h

"I also have autism-" Yes, you are disabled. I call myself disabled because I am autistic.

Ariana ♡

Date posted: 21h

Okay, thank you! I know there's a lot of speculation as to whether speaking and independent autistics are really disabled or not, and I have so much trouble with the new levels theory 😭 I think it's good to have a distinction between two autistic people: one will never will alone or be able to work a job and the other is a CEO. And my parents, especially my dad who my autism came from, says all the time "you are NOT disabled" whenever I mention it or something and I have no idea why or what the point of saying that is. He is autistic but he would never label himself as disabled, and honestly it's hard to know if I would say he's disabled ever, either, and my girlfriend struggles immensely with things like food, hygiene, and school, which I only struggle with mildly, and she would never claim to be disabled. It's very confusing to me 🫠

Generiname

Date posted: 21h

@Ariana ♡ Your father can say what he wants. But that doesn't mean he's right. There is NOTHING wrong with being disabled. It wasn't something you chose, it was something you were born with. ADHD can also be classified as a disability. As can OCD. People like to pretend as if they aren't disabled because of the shame society still projects onto people like us. Just because you're good at masking, does not mean you aren't disabled.

zitizuppa

Date posted: 19h

@Ariana ♡ Yeah some people are really scared of the disability label because they were able to avoid some amount of discrimination by refusing it. These people might think of the label as giving up but really it can be a way of acknowledging and communicating limitations and seeking support. It can be a very personal and emotional topic for some people. I cried so much when I first got disability accommodations for school but they helped me a lot after I had denied needing them for so many years. I would never have been able to graduate without them.

zitizuppa

Date posted: 19h

You are definitely disabled. Your parents get furious because they are ableist. They probably want what’s best for you and care about you, but maybe they don’t want to accept the truth because they think that being disabled is a terrible thing. But if you get good support and therapy, you can still have a really great life, it will just look different than most people’s. Society is extremely discriminatory towards disabled people because there is a tendency encouraged by capitalism to believe that ppl’s value comes from their work. And if they can’t work or need to work less, they are worth less to capitalism and therefore society. Disabled people challenge that every day by just existing and finding themselves and each other valuable, by knowing that our worth comes from the value of human life. Another possibility is that maybe your parents are afraid about the discrimination and suffering you might endure as a disabled person and so are denying the truth for that reason. Or it might be some other reason. It’s hard to say without talking to them. But whatever their reason is, try not to let their baggage bring u down. you’re always going to be better off accepting the truth and going from there. I’d recommend reading some books on disability justice and autism. Good luck on your journey

Ariana ♡

Date posted: 18h

Thank yoy so much! That means a lot to me ♡♡

Ariana ♡

Date posted: 21h

The adhd js not medicated, pmdd is. Sorry for confusion

uncertain_Aly

Date posted: 24w

Does OCD impact your ability to get to work?

Often times I find myself spiraling out in the morning about all sorts of things. When I try and catch myself and figure out what I am obsessing over it’s like it goes away. I haven’t moved. I have been sitting frozen on the floor because I can’t go to work because I am behind on work and I hate being late and I hate being messy but I am frequently late and my room is cluttered and full of stuff. I want to be good and move and go to work but I don’t know what is coming today and I hate my job so I know I will get bored and when I have nothing to keep me busy and engaged I like start thinking and taking an inventory of what is going on and then I will feel a sensation and what is the sensation? How did it happen? And I know that I will pick up the bad emotions in the office and get contaminated, I was really worried about things like this as a kid too I cried because I had to touch dirt in kindergarten. I know I am this way and I have been this way for a while but at the same time I think I might just be normal and like I don’t know why I get stuck in thinking like this. Then I begin to doubt that OCD is real because everyone has a brain with wiring and everyone gets stuck in thought sometimes. I feel disabled from whatever this is because I am stuck. I literally cannot move because I don’t know what’s wrong and I know I have to go to work even though I feel like every moment I spend there is making everything worse because other people are so stressed and I get it from them. And I don’t feel ready because I just feel off and something is wrong and I just don’t know what to do because if it’s OCD or not OCD everything anyone knows about me is coming from me and I worry that I am often masking all the thinking I’m doing because thinking all the time is rude and inconsiderate and inconvenient for those around me, but I can’t stop. I just don’t feel right, right now - and I want to know WHY?? Why is everything off all the time? How do I even know that I am not making up the experience of OCD in my head to cover up something really wrong with me and now I am taking on the symptoms of OCD like an actress, because this could be something that I can latch onto as a final hope for explaining why I am stuck. So stuck so deeply and terribly stuck sitting on my floor next to my bed just scrolling to avoid thinking because any time I start thinking I am left with no answers or help or anything just this swirly feeling. I know I am trying, maybe not my best, but as much as I possibly can. I want to be a Special Education Teacher but I have so much so so so much doubt and uncertainty about every decision I make and everything I know that I can’t get there right now. I can’t do anything right now until it feels ok and then I will. It never feels ok. I know I have to be ok not feeling ok about it. I can be unsure and still be ok. I know it’s just my thinking and my body but I just can’t get past this feeling. And then I know that because I can calm myself and be ok even though I spent 2 hours of my life today already feeling stuck and spinning around and around and around in my head - I don’t feel sure about my OCD and I think it’s a bit of a scam made up by people to cultivate pathology around deep human thought because one day I might figure it out and we all think a lot.

finches

Date posted: 18w

anyone with autism + ocd?

so. oh lord. half my ocd symptoms could be autism. (not that im looking for a triple diagnosis including adhd, its just interesting to explore) this little ol rabbit hole started with my friend, who happens to be autistic and passionate about how their own condition works, when they started slowly easing the convo into an autism screening and by the time i realized what he was doing it was “oh my god ur kinda right i might be wrong for denying all this time that i could have autism” always thought my experience with texture/sensory as a toddler (and now) was ocd, because thats mainly what made adults call me ocd, more blatant ocd signs aside (such as touching things “just right”, ordering items etc) wondered why i was like that when theres not even a *direct* link between ocd and sensory issues (not the same as somatic ocd) thought i just happen to be an extremely sensitive person since i was born, now realizing that couldve been a sign of autism, along side many more “quirks” ive always had anyone with autism and ocd that can tell me what their experience is like? what about when u were children? especially if u snuck under the radar until u were older, my parents have said only a few times in the moment that i remind them of an autistic kid but dont think i have it

Order & Symmetry OCD

I_am_kiwi_08

Date posted: 15w

Are we mentally disabled?

I know that sounds a bit harsh, but people with OCD think very differently then everyone else and we do strange things. I used to think OCD was just that we overthink to much and have compulsions to fix it, but its kinda alot more than that i realise. Like peoples lives are legit debilitated from this thing. Thats serious and i dont think others realise that. Mabye im concerned too much idk.

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