Is anyone's partner forcing them to get over their OCD? I've been dealing with OCD for over 14 years and never really tried to seek out help. I tried CBT a few years ago but didn't really benefit from it so I gave it up after a few months. Fast forward to today, I just got off the phone with my girlfriend who confessed how troubled she is by the severity of my OCD. She's always been accepting of it and even said she found it cute and endearing, but after spending a lot more time together recently she's realized it's a lot more serious than she ever considered. We've talked about having kids for a while now and she just dropped this bomb on me that she doesn't want to a raise a kid in a household that is suffering from a disorder this powerful. While I understand where she's coming from, a part of me does find it a bit unfair that she's asking me to undergo so much change while I would never ask her to do anything comparable. She has so many hesitations about modern medicine and vaccines, and while that bothers me a lot, I don't really mention it because to each their own. But now that I'm being a bit cornered into seeking therapy, I'm now considering bringing all these things up. If I'm willing to seek therapy and get better, why can't she do the same and start trusting medicine a bit more? I'm trusting ERP and CBT, going out on a limb to give therapy one more shot, even seeking out books on hacking my brain to try and get over OCD. How do I go about making her see that if I'm willing to do this for our future family, then she should be willing to start trusting medicine and vaccines as well for the sake of our future kids?

Ella___

Date posted: 5y

Personally, she should understand that you are soing the best you can as well as seeking help to better yourself for her yourself and your future kids. If she’s already showing signs that shes not supportive of it and its bothering her as well as making you feel like your incapable of having a family then I just think its very unfair to you. Yes, you do have to acknowledge how she is feeling but she should also consider how you feel as well you constantly have to battle these things every single day of your life and you do the best you can yet she picks at your flaws but expects you not to pick at hers or express opinion on things shes pro for no you need to talk to her and you both have to express exactly how you feel and work on your relationship from there.

hateocd123

Date posted: 5y

I definitely think that she should be more understanding, and I agree that she should trust modern medicine. I grew up with a father with pretty severe OCD and it was difficult, I understand where she's coming from to a certain extent. If my dad had seeked help we would have had a much more stable household. I'm not trying to beat you up, but getting help is the best thing you can do for yourself and your future family.

Emmaaaahh

Date posted: 5y

I do understand where she is coming from, but forcing you into getting better isn't really the way to go, and making you feel guilty for not being better isn't going to help you one bit to get there. Also, I think that personally if my partner didn't believe in vaccines and modern medicine to a point that they would stop our kid from using it, I would definitely have to talk to them about it before considering having a kid with them. Just explain that just like your OCD may have an impact on the kid, her mindset towards modern medicine may have an impact on the kid as well. It doesnt have to be accusatory, but an open conversation where your feelings are communicated. You have the right to do so. Ultimately, I hope you are able to feel better for you ❤ and I hope your partner is willing to realize that doing so is possible but will take some time and understanding :) If she is not, then you will find someone someday who is, because you deserve to have somebody who is!

Emmaaaahh

Date posted: 5y

I have been in both healthy and unhealthy relationships. In the healthy ones, communication of feelings can still be difficult, but in the end it is helpful and yields good results. If you communicate your feelings and your partner makes you feel bad for that then the relationship probably is simply not for you (I say simply although I know it's not that simple). Always remember to be true to yourself:)

bubbsle

Date posted: 24w

Tips for Anxiety

Hey guys! My boyfriend has said recently that he doesn't know if he's strong enough to continue with our relationship because of my OCD. He wants to see me overcome my symptoms and learn to live a healthy life with OCD, but my anxieties and obsessions are starting to really affect his life. I understand his reasoning, it's hard to see someone you care about struggle with OCD, especially when it starts to affect you too. I'm asking for tips to deal with my compulsions in the relationship. I HAVE to know the answer to things and sometimes that leads into arguments because even with apologies and discussions I can't let things go, even if they genuinely don't matter or are miniscule issues we have. It's a healthy relationship otherwise but I feel horrible because it's impacting him so negatively, that's the absolute last thing I want to happen. I care for him deeply and he cares for me too, so I don't want my OCD to be a reason we break up but I fear it's headed in that direction. I'm starting therapy soon, but until then what are some things I can do to stop my ROCD from impacting him? I know sitting in the guilt and anxiety of not completing my obsessions will help, but I'm wondering if there are other things I can do to maybe remedy some of the damage already done.

PBubblegum

Date posted: 22w

My partner has severe OCD

Hello i got this app hoping to maybe find some support for my partner i thought about reddit but reddit has become a hateful place and i figured this is a safe place. i love my partner more than anything and he’s been struggling with OCD his whole life he has a hard time talking about it with anyone because it’s too painful he’s stated that it’s gotten worse as he’s gotten older His biggest issue right now is overwhelming thoughts of his actions having tragic outcomes and being unable to stop these obsessive thoughts (such as needing to check out door handle 5 times to make sure it’s locked but still panicking that it’s unlocked) he’s not open to one on one therapy or meds although he loves learning and watching informative videos i fear he’s afraid to confront his OCD or just afraid nothing will help i really wanna help him live a stress free and happy life he deserves it would anyone possibly have any ways to naturally help with OCD or recommend any great individuals that could share techniques on managing OCD or helping your partner with OCD? i would very much appreciate it!

Anonymous

Date posted: 18w

Willing to do anything.

What is a common family joke. OCD is hereditary on my father's side. However I also live with complex PTSD, and ADHD. I didn't learn till recently how severe my OCD is and the intensity gets amplified if the though goes to either of the other two. It's a loop I've identified recently... just little too late. I've lived with OCD for years not really addressing it till I see that's the very reason I cause damage to loved ones. I'm married, 33, a vet. My marriage is not in the best place now. I have a son who's 4 and already showing signs of OCD. Currently my marriage is at a point where we are working on ourselves. It's discovered that my wife's issues are reflections of my own. I understand fully now that I am the center of the issues but also the solution. I need help for me. What happens with my relationships depends on me showing that I am better and able to process thoughts and emotions better. Journaling helps alot. Trying to do hobbies or this that and 3rd but. I'm willing to try anything. Things are on a line. I'm open to any and all POV and ideas. I'm not out crying. I'm taking a big step for me. Something 25 years over due. Thank you for reading this. As I tell myself now. You'll best this and be better

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