my body is not in equilibrium and is not 100% and thus i am panicking. it has not gone away and i despise my brain for not letting me just go on with my life. i think this is hell
my stomach hurts but it doesnt hurt and i have a dull headache and im tired even tho i slept enough and i sometimes have hives and i just think of all the people on instagram that are like “dont trust ur doctor” and the effects of long covid and if i have long covid what else it could morph into and i know im ruminating but the thoughts feel valid and they wont stop make them stop god make them stop
Your ocd just wants you to /believe/ that you’re that ill. It will go to the furthest extents to convince you of something that’s frightening and false. Just because something makes you /feel/ like it’s true doesn’t mean it’s actually true, especially if it contradicts what you know. You could say “We’ll cross that bridge if we get there, but for now I’m going to resist the urge to assume.”
@GodsTreasure how do you do that when your body and brain are screaming at you? im genuinely asking i speak but its like a whisper in a tsunami and tornado
@Anonymous Dang, that’s a real way to put it. I mean I used to think I had diabetes because I would swallow too much and too loud. Now I’ve given it time and I don’t consider it anymore. My mind and body used to also scream at me all kinds of lies that only felt real due to negativity bias wired in our systems. It’s like no matter how ludicrous a lie sounds, I will still automatically believe in it because of my unfair prejudice against true reassurance.
@GodsTreasure same here!! ive been convinced i have everything and rn its more if i will develop conditions that can ruin my life/quality of life, which also ruins my quality of life bc im so anxious about it! i have to spray and sanitize whenever i’m with strangers and im trying to make sure it doesnt impact those i love but its so hard bc there are so many germs and ik im at risk of just developing agoraphobia bc i can control whats in my house but even then no i cant bc im in an apartment and air circulation means germs from outside can get in
@GodsTreasure my only true erp session thus far went so poorly and i have had times where i have days long anxiety attacks bc i cannot get myself regulated from this anxiety
@Anonymous “The only thing worse than suffering is the fear of suffering itself” you’re trying so hard to protect yourself from something that should only be afraid of you. Sometimes it’s all about finding the right attitude/perspective.
@GodsTreasure im trying man, i really am. nothing feels like it works for long. ill say mantras and try the “maybe” approach and do the dbt stuff but every time it just keeps coming back worse
@Anonymous Yeah it’s hard. Sometimes it’s all about not trying. Also, negativity bias can make you feel certain about something false. Positivity can make you feel uncertain about something true.
@GodsTreasure ive been doin those gratitude prompts and they havent been the most helpful which sucks :( i feel like im broken
@Anonymous You’re not broken, you’re human. Your brain believes pretty much everything you believe, so that’s why you’re getting mixed signals. Believe in good things even if it doesn’t feel right. Rebel against the chaos.
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