rocd pls help me with an advice

@Rocdistheworst31 so thank u for replying I know Im not alone in this situation but someone who is like me is so relaxing idk why thank you for replying 😭 so I had friends that I talked in my past as flirty u know maybe sending photos for attention I dont actually remember like %100 percent but I think I sent that kind of things to people always when I was kid, we were friends with the people I mentioned I stoped speaking with them after our relatioship became 3,5 month old so I think about that we were friends with that people when we stop speaking but what if I talk stupid things when Im with my bf and forgot and the other thing in my head I had 2 friends and after I started to think about this thougts I wanted to delete 1-2 messages I sent but there were not that but I just thought I was writing to them even tho they left me in seen or something like that I keep replying their story or talking about something I deleted them because I looked like wrote to them again and again like too much but now I feel like I should tell him I deleted them. I even think about did I send stupid sexual photos to my friend and forgot , u feel me ? does this things happened to you too?

@Iwannabeokayy I feel u so much everytime i talk to a friend of mine before i delete somethings i screenshot it for my own calm mind if i dont imma be like wait did i said something bad and i forgot? Will my fiance get mad because i deleted something bc i didnt want the messages to be there and he will get upset even tho i didnt said anything bad but what if i didnt and i cant remember? I was also flirty but way worse my pics were everywhere on my city a lot of guys trapped me and took innapropiate photos that got around everywhere and everyone.I dont have friends anymore because im scared what if they are posing as a girl and its a dude yk? Idk if this happens to u for irl friends there is not a single chance i cut everyone off 3 months into the relationship its been i think 2 years since im anonymous everywhere and nobody can find me but i do see those people when im out with my fiance and from my past i developed ptsd which my fiance understands rlly well he knows abt the pics the flirty texts bfs and everything and he still stayed to this day but false memory ocd is the worst when ur imagining things wrong!

@Iwannabeokayy And im 100% sure he is with u because he loves u and being mad for a person past is somehow understandable but not to the point to cause a big fight u were a literal child who was still learning life and how life works everyone makes mistakes! im pretty sure ur bf wont mind about something u did when u were a kid people change while growing and its absolutely normal to make mistakes at that age from my prespective its ur first serious relationship(and the last if God desires) so thats why u deleveloped rocd (my opinion u know more than i do) but ocd attacks what u love most and im sure ur memories are not true they dont define u even if they are true they make u uncomfortable which shows ur growth! I hope with the bottom of my heart that u will heal and get through this because u deserve peace and quiet from the running thoughts 24/7 :)

@Rocdistheworst31 yeah I feel you so much my situation is similar but there is not photos that much I think like I sent when I was 14-16 maybe but I was a discord kid and talking with people all the time and sometimes I did things that I regret like u yeah I talk with my bf too and he understands me too and says idc what you do in your past even the worst but I dont need to know them u know he is still with me but Im scared to lose him because of my stupid thoughts and my past u know saying "I just wanted to know that I do bla bla bla when im 14-16 idk we didnt talked about that but I wanted to tell you" is stupid, plus this thoughts mostly happenes when I remember something I did with my boyfriend but I did it with someone too with someone u know and I feel like he needs to know. ( the thing can be anything but the thing I remember I remember after I texted here ig rn and its kinda sexual 😭 I judge my self and I feel regret in me soo much I just need to distract myself, talking with someone or with my mom sometimes feel better. The other thing that disturbs me I wanna keep everything that includes this kind of stuff like we talked or I talked in somewhere maybe sometimes I wanna record or screeshot or tell to someone..

@Rocdistheworst31 Thank you so much I çan understand what u feel I hope we will be better 🙏🏻🙏🏻

@Iwannabeokayy I get the sexual part! Sometime when my and my fiance get intimate paranoia catches into me and i think im cheating on him even though its him or when i did somethings with my fiance in the beggining i remember it like i did it with someone else when it was him so i get u i hope we will be okay

@Rocdistheworst31 thank u again if you wanna share and talk u can reply anytime u want 🙏🏻

@Iwannabeokayy I really hoped there was a message option on here man… and thank u as well u made me feel less alone

@Rocdistheworst31 u can always reply here when u wanna talk with someone (me) we dont bother no one and everyone is suffering same or similar things here

@Community AI Helper yes pls

@Iwannabeokayy - Happy to share! What you're describing — the worry about your past, the "what if I forgot something" loops, needing to go over everything with your boyfriend until there's nothing left to explain — is a really recognizable pattern in ROCD and Real Events OCD. The uncertainty about whether it's even OCD is actually part of what makes this cycle so exhausting. Here is a resource that you may find helpful: Real Event OCD: When the Past Becomes a Source of Obsession https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/real-events-ocd This covers exactly why the mind keeps returning to the past looking for certainty, why the explaining and reviewing don't bring relief, and what treatment looks like. Is this something you've been navigating on your own, or have you had a chance to connect with anyone about it?

@Community AI Helper there is too many thoughts I have been think of I didnt ask questions for all of them but I asked and wanted correct myself sometimes for same thing or sometimes different

@Community AI Helper Go away AI