Does anyone else, have this?

@Anonymous Thank you for your support 🥺It’s so hard, like I even have an appointment today, and it’s like I refuse to go. I’m afraid of them finding anything wrong because… you know, if there is something bad, and if there is no treatment, then I’m screwed basically. So I just avoid things out of fear. Though , I feel so alone cause nobody understands like the people around me. So yea, I understand you too, it’s so difficult… just like for me, I have trauma from school, and now i absolutely can not seem to stay there. The thoughts get louder there and it’s taking forever for me to get help I need. 😔

@star☁️💗 yea i’m new to NOCD, but even the fact we’re doing this rn is mind blowing to me. medical ocd is no joke and it’s worse when seeking reassurance over something completely made up in your head ( no symptoms, just the fear ) then it’s the health anxiety and embarrassment mixed together 😭

@Anonymous Yea… I’m embarrassed about it too 😭 I just overthink every little thing that I do, till it sounds illogical. I try explaining why I think this way and I get brushed off like “ that’s crazy”. Ummm yes it is, but that’s why it’s scary too. You have no idea if you have anything and when you get checked out, you just feel scared of the results. I couldn’t even get checked out for something because it felt like they might find something bad. I always seek reassurance secretly, if you know what I mean… like subtle asking, not straight forward but just looking for an answer. It feels so awful like OCD be so bad somedays… it’s even worse when something bad happened to a person you love and now you convince yourself that you played a part in a medical emergency.

@star☁️💗 yes exactly, especially the subtle asking. like droppin a question then waiting 10 min or so and asking another. i literally will convince myself i have jaundice nearly every week. it’s like people don’t understand ive obsessed over this SO much, that yes- to ME, i am yellow. then its wondering why no one cares that something so bad is wrong with you and faulting them🫤

@Anonymous I relate to that sooo much. It’s like magical thinking kind of, like you believe that you may have done something, so a health issue will definitely arise. Honestly , it’s like our minds don’t like to be quiet and want us to question every single thing. 😭 plus it feels more isolating when people think that you’re going crazy and not caring, like you said. Trust me, I definitely know that feeling of just being thought of as being overdramatic or completely gone crazy, by what I say or think. Worse thing is , when they don’t understand OCD and how it works so it’s constant invalidation and loneliness that you just have to bare. 😔 subtle and straight forward reassurance seeking is sooo bad but it feels unstoppable.

@star☁️💗 yesss and sometimes it makes me angry that something that feels so debilitating and takes up every second you’re awake with intrusive thoughts and becomes your whole personality- when saying it’s OCD, that’s “advertised” as “i need shit to be clean and straight” so even giving an explanation to people feels embarrassing cause it’s once again misunderstood. it’s not even about getting over ocd, but hope that one day you’ll have control again, but there’s huge comfort just having others who know exactly what it’s like 🫶🏻🫶🏻

@Anonymous I hope we could have control again 🥺 this is such an isolating experience and I feel put down for struggling. It’s like I’m forced to do exposure every single day even when I’m uncomfortable. I’ve even been told “ I should do more and give my brain more stimulation “, to just get over the thoughts. That’s the most unhelpful information, I’ve ever been taught. So I really hate when people act like it’s no big deal or act like it’s some cutesy illness. OCD clouds my brain sometimes to the point , it makes me cry or get angry. So honestly, I don’t know how to face this because nobody understands. I’m hoping to join some fun places and mental health groups to hopefully make friends and have people who actually understand me. I really hope we get through this 🩷💗

@star☁️💗 idk how this app works entirely yet, but you’re welcome to text me anytime! God knows i get it, and i have a habit of talking too much when an opportunity arises TO talk about it! so we could rant all day if needed 💕 love the people in my life, but no one really gets it

@Anonymous Well, I followed you, idk if there is a text button. I’m having a really hard time, today cause OCD has a new theme for me. I hate it so much and really need someone like you, who really gets me. It is so difficult explaining all the time , to people who don’t understand… :( 💗 i appreciate you tho