This is something really weird to share! When I was 12 I was with my dog on my lap and the touch of his paws made me aroused! I was naturally watching TV! Then I thought what if I used him to have sexual pleasure? And then I felt really disgusted by that thought! Like I was an animal pervert but I think it was a pretty irrational thought and totally a thought not a want to do! But now I remembered that moment and I can't stop feeling that I was horrible by having thought about it and asking myself if I had done it would I be nowadays a dog rappist? This scares me! Do you feel that this was a normal thought considering the age and situation or am I a disgusting person?

My OCD has swapped around in the past- primarily focused on HOCD and then I just accepted maybe I was attracted to both men and women, (men primarily, women only sexually occasionally) after I had sex with a girl - I didn’t know at the time it was OCD - and now it has focused on beastiality. I’m terrified. I hate HATE to admit this but when I was younger I let a dog lick my private area, and ever since I can’t stop thinking maybe that was because I wanted it? Even though I know deep down it was just sexual curiosity - the actual act of intimacy and not the animal, but now I get scared. In the past few years I have seen images and checked my groinal response, sometimes I can get really aroused and I feel disgusting. I love animals, I would never want to hurt them in anyway, I don’t know whether I just have a fixation on the idea of having sex that is intense - sort of like a ‘I need you now’ thing - as comes with the term ‘doggy style’ but then this just makes me think maybe it’s all rooted down to animals? I’m so honestly terrified I feel like the government will arrest me based on searches of laws and me trying to figure out if I’m attracted to animals going on forums etc. I once read an erotic literature page and it had a beastiality section, I looked at it and was repulsed but again my groinal response was different. I feel so guilty, but I can’t tell if this is my OCD or if I am actually attracted to animals. I would NEVER have sex with one, the idea repulses me, but somehow I can get aroused by the stories (not particularly the images) and I’m so stressed and upset I don’t know what to do I’m too scared to tell my therapist incase they lock me up for it and it hinders my future jobs :(

i’m in DESPERATE need of help. i cant even handle this, i feel like the shittiest person in the world. I want you guys to be honest but also don’t think of me as the worst person ever. So, i’m so close to being 16 now. When i was younger i guess i was exposed to more sexual things at a young age. i was in like 5th-6th grade i’m pretty sure and seventh maybe but i highly doubt it and my middle school doesn’t start til 7th so i was basically just in elementary school. i hate saying this it literally disgusts me but i have to do it for my own sanity. so, at this age, i touched my neighbors dog and like did other things. it wasn’t like a thing that went on and happened every day, but it happened a few times. i basically just did sexual things with an animal and it’s so gross. i didn’t do like actual sex but it’s still gross. and i remember when i was SO young i like humped my other neighbors dog. i think it’s so horrible to look back into now and i promise i’m not a horrible person and i think that is horrible now, but i cant change the past. i don’t want this to bother me for my whole life and i literally swear i’m not a horrible person i was just young and didn’t know any better i guess. i think of Shane Dawson and how he got canceled for stuff like this but wasn’t he like literally an adult when it happened? i don’t know, i just want to cry so badly. i hate myself. any advice?

I just had an intrusive thought about touching my dogs private area. For some reason I though doing it would make the anxiety go away. I poked it and now I feel like I raped her or something I feel so awful.