- Date posted
- 5y ago
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Yes! 100%! I’m sorry you’re going through this! COVID-19 has made my symptoms way worse too! I’ve been in my relationship 6 years and for the first 4 years I was so happy and felt so in love but for the last 2 years I’ve truly been feeling out of love with him (even though I do still LOVE him a lot) and have a lot of concerns about our relationship since we’re so different. I also obsess a lot about the attractiveness thing since he’s gained 80 lbs since we started dating. I get so caught up in “am I still attracted to him enough?” I did a lot of research on ROCD to see if I had it but I never thought I did since I felt like all of my concerns were truly valid and not just my brain trying to sabbotage something that was otherwise “great.” I knew we didn’t have a picturesque relationship and therefore I thought it wasn’t ROCD. However last week I finally started ERP with an NOCD therapist and she said I DO have relationship OCD because of how much I obsess about our relationship- regardless of if my concerns are valid or not and that ROCD takes MANY forms. I’ve always obsessed a lot about friendships too, so the ROCD diagnosis actually makes sense. Do you live with your partner? If so I’m sure that’s a huge added challenge- to be stuck at home with them all the time and obsessing about the relationship’s “flaws” or your partner’s “flaws.” I know that’s true for me. We live with his family too so it’s a lot of stress! You’re definitely not alone! I highly recommend the Book mindfulness for OCD because it has a section on ROCD! It’s on Amazon! Best wishes! ?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
It’s crazy how much I can relate to all of this! We’re living separately at the moment which is also a trigger. Physical touch/kissing/hugging helps me feel more in love, and the distance has made me terrified I’m falling out of love bc I can’t get that affection anymore (we haven’t seen each other in over a month). My partner also gained quite a bit of weight due to depression so I can 100 percent relate to the attraction thing! It’s my biggest obsession. Thank you for sharing your experience ❤️❤️❤️ also I highly recommend googling “Sheryl Paul” if you haven’t already: her articles honestly have kept me sane. She’s so gentle and reassuring :)
- Date posted
- 5y ago
We’re also incredibly different (my partner and I). My partner is religious whereas I’m not, and we come from different cultural backgrounds (they’re first generation Chinese) I’ve learned that those differences can help you understand a different way of viewing the world, even if they can cause tension and conflict due to different values. It can always work with mutual respect ❤️❤️❤️
- Date posted
- 5y ago
@flowergirlglow Oh yes I’m sure that would be a huge trigger! I’m so sorry you haven’t been able to see each other this whole time, that would be so hard! I’m sorry you’re dealing with the attraction thing too, it’s so hard. Honestly I think it’s my biggest obsession about our relationship too! It’s like deep down I know I’m still attracted to him but then I look at him yummy and stat obsessing! It sucks! Of course, thanks so much for Sharing yours as well! ?Oh cool I’ll definitely look her up! Thank you! ❤️
- Date posted
- 5y ago
@flowergirlglow Aw yes it’s definitely hard when you’re so different from each other but like you said- so true that those difference can help you ina lot of ways too! Exactly! Thanks for the great reminder! ❤️
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Yes you’re not alone! Mine has been better with structure and working; then this started a month ago and my partner and I are out of work. That being said my rocd really flared up again, with really nothing to distract me. You’re not alone and it’s going to be okay!
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Same ?? you too ❤️❤️ hang in there!
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I do!! My ocd tells me I no longer love my fiance and that I'm just trying to convince myself that I want to stay with him
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I feel this! Stay strong ❤️❤️
- Date posted
- 5y ago
yes!! i really recommend watching Awaken into Love on youtube!!! it helped me a lot
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Omg I love awaken into love sm
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Yes! You are not alone, I identify so much with this. Knowing that are other people going through the same thing helps a lot. Thanks for talking about this!
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Thank you! You’re definitely not alone ?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Yeup ??♀️
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Is ocd a head space? 2 weeks ago it felt like i dropped out of my head and into my body. I am often disconnected from myself but then i was connected to me and also my fiance and it felt so good. But then i started becoming disconnected again and all in my head. I struggeled with rocd but overcame that and now its back again and i dont want this to be my truth!!! Its horrible. I am not that anxious anymore because i know that i dont have to act on those thoughts and feelings and that i have a choice. I wonder sometimes what the true me is. Sometimes i get a mood lift but still feel disconnected from myself and wonder if this is my truth because i dont feel anxious and my mood lifts a little Bit. Its like mood lift= no ocd and bad mood=ocd. Its like i cant think my own thoughts sometime
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Hiiiii, yes I also have rocd. I know mine is ocd because the thoughts torture me. Well I guess I don’t know for sure haha if I did it wouldn’t bug me. Even when I started explaining them to my therapist I started to cry..Covid 19 I’m sure is making everyone’s mental heath worse ? Are you taking any meds? How is the ERP going? I would like to see a NOCD specialist but I live in Canada and it’s just in the US right now.. your not alone anyways
- Date posted
- 5y ago
aww, I’m so sorry ? me too. I don’t have an ocd specialist in my area so I just do regular therapy but I do take meds! I used to take SSRIS for like six years but they made me feel weird so I switched to Lamictal (it’s usually for bipolar but it can be used for ocd) It doesn’t get rid of the thoughts but it does take the edge off the panic so they don’t usually lead to panic attacks anymore ❤️
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Hey, I’m struggling with this too, but I’ve been struggling since my first boyfriend (and maybe before that, but idk) that wasn’t a really good relationship but I loved him so much that I started to feel those thoughts... I was so young back then that I really thought I was going crazy. Then years go by and I buried those feelings by avoiding every serious relationship. Until I met my actual boyfriend. I’ve been two years managing my fears , living happy and enjoying my relation. The past December my company shut down and I lost my job, a few weeks later... I was panicking thinking millions of possibilities of losing him. I’m on therapy but I’m working on my own aswel. I’m not an expert, far from that, but all I can say is that you decide what is true for you doing what you want, not because your mind decide it.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 18w ago
I’ve just recently found out that Relationship OCD is a thing. I feel like I relate but it also feels like relationship trauma. I’m in a fairly new relationship and I keep telling myself that things are going great, we are good, he cares for me, but does he? There’s this unbelievable amount of self doubt that sits in me because of what my ex did to me many months ago. I kept getting told that I do too much, i smother, need constant reassurance, then got told that I don’t care enough, the things I do aren’t enough and that I’m not enough. I feel like I am waiting for the day that I get broken up with because of these “problems” just so I can be proven right at the fact that I should be considered unlovable. I go through this every month around my period because I get so emotional and nervous that I stress over the idea that he doesn’t like me. How does someone continue a relationship with Relationship OCD? How do I explain it?
- Date posted
- 12w ago
For the past 3 months ish I’ve been struggling on and off with this anxiety and fixation over my relationship. To wondering if i still have feelings for an old friend, wondering if i actually love him, wondering if the thoughts are all real and im just trying to cover it up with ocd. It sucks, when im talking to my boyfriend i feel fine. The words i love you and talks about the future come naturally. I can’t imagine myself with anyone but him. But this constant rumination on my relationship is KILLING me and I’m scared it’s going to ruin what i have. It makes me numb and disconnected which therefore makes me believe the thoughts even more. They just feel so real sometimes and it’s so scary like why can i not just enjoy it. We’ve been together for a while so i know there’s periods of like feelings ebb and flowing but this is so much more. It’s just constantly sitting on my chest with anxiety. My compulsions are coming on this app, looking at photos of us and confessing it to him. He’s very understanding and helpful. I love him so much. I just need help / I’m also just starting new meds as well ..
- Date posted
- 12w ago
I'm struggling really hard with relationship obsessions. Do I really love my partner? How can I know? Am I really just faking it? That kind of thing. It's making my life and relationship a lot harder than they need to be. I could use a few helpful coping mechanisms, trying to move away from less helpful ones like chasing reassurance.
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